The Best 76 Orange Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Orange jokes. There are some orange purple jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these orange orange you glad puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Orange Jokes and Puns

I'm not having much luck with jobs lately.

I couldn't concentrate in the orange juice factory; wasn't suited to be a tailor; the muffler factory was just exhausting; couldn't cut it as barber; didn't have the patience to be a doctor; didn't fit in the shoe factory; pool maintenance was too draining and I just couldn't see any future as a historian.

What rhymes with Orange

No it doesn't

What's orange and sounds like a parrot?

A carrot

Orange joke, What's orange and sounds like a parrot?

A jew and a mexican are talking...

The jew says, "lemme ask you something, are theres jews in mexico?"

The mexican replies "oh yes my friend, plenty of jews...apple jews, orange jews, and tomato jews."

Bag Boy

This guy has been working as a bag boy in a supermarket for five years. One day the supermarket gets new orange juice machines, and the bag boy is really excited and asks the manager if he can work the juice machines.The manager says no. The bagger says, "But I've been working here for five years. Why can't I run the juice machines?" The manager answers, "I'm sorry, son, but baggers can't be juicers."


What did one orange say to the other orange?

Do you speak Mandarin?

What happened when the orange slept with the dirty lemon?

He got lemonaids.

Orange joke, What happened when the orange slept with the dirty lemon?

My friend is getting a new car - a "tangerine" ford focus. Dad drops this one...

Tangerine focus... Isn't that the same as orange concentrate?

What do you call gingers in Auschwitz?

Concentrated Orange Jews

Last night I dreamed the oceans were made of orange soda.

But it was just a Fanta sea.

How did Hitler like his orange juice?

Concentrated.

You can explore orange peeler reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean orange lemon dad jokes. There are also orange puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


What was Hitler's favorite drink?

Orange jews, 100% concentrated

Do you ever put an orange in your beer?

Once in a Blue Moon

Why did the orange stop rolling down the hill?

It ran out of juice.

I shall take my leave now.

Hillary Clinton lost last time to the first African American president, Barack Obama. Why will she lose this one to Donald Trump?

Because orange is the new black.

I've always dreamed of swimming in an ocean of orange soda

Its a fanta-sea of mine

Orange joke, I've always dreamed of swimming in an ocean of orange soda

My friend said to me, what rhymes with orange

I said no, it certainly does not

I Just got fired from the orange juice factory.

They said I could not concentrate

An old man was sitting on a bus. A young man sat down beside him.

He had spiked hair in all different colors: green, red, orange, blue and yellow. The old man Just stared.

Every time the young man looked,the old man was staring. The young man finally said sarcastically, "What's the matter old timer, never done anything wild in your life?"
Without batting an eye, the old man replied, "Got drunk once and had sex with a parrot. I was just wondering if you were my son.


Donald Trump is like a marshmallow...

He's easy to roast, a little orange on top, catches fire easily, and will melt down when he gets under too much heat.

What do Donald Trump and a pumpkin have in common?

They're orange on the outside, hollow on the inside and should be tossed out in early November.

[Offensive] What do you get when you cross a bowl of fruit and the holocaust?

Orange Jews from concentrate

Whata country..

You might remember comedian Yakov Smirnoff. When he first came to the United States from Russia he was not prepared for the incredible variety of instant products available in American grocery stores.

He says, "On my first shopping trip, I saw powdered milk -- you just add water, and you get milk. Then I saw powdered orange juice -- you just add water, and you get orange juice. And then I saw baby powder, and I thought to my self, "What a country!"

Blue Guy lives in the blue house, red guy lives in the red house, purple guy lives in the purple house, orange guy...

Lives in the White House.

A friend of mine asked me, "what rhymes with orange?"

I said, "no, it doesn't".

*Credit to Jimmy Carr.*

**

Why couldn't the apple speak to the orange ?

because he didn't know Mandarin

I miss the days when the Annoying Orange was just a fictional youtube character

And not the President of the United States.

Give a man a fire, he's warm for a day

Teach a man to fire: he'll turn orange, run a reality show based on it, and then take over your country.

If the blue man lives in the blue house, the green man lives in the green house, and the red man lives in the red house, then who lives in the white house?

The orange man

The Beatles all walk into an orange underwater vehicle

Oops, wrong sub

A boy was bagging groceries at a supermarket.

One day the store installed a machine for squeezing fresh orange juice.

Intrigued, the young man asked if he could be allowed to work the machine, but his request was denied.

Said the store manager, "Sorry, kid, but baggers can't be juicers."

How often do I put orange slices in my beer?

Oh, once in a Blue Moon.

There's a way of telling if an orange is male or female…

If it squirts you in your eye without warning, it's a male.

If it's bitter for no apparent reason, it's a female.

I had to quit my job at the Orange Juice factory, it was too distracting there.

I just couldn't concentrate.

What's orange, has a pointy head, and can take someone to the top?

An upvote.

This morning, the doctor told me I was colorblind.

It came completely out of the orange.

I dreamed I drowned in an ocean made of orange soda.

When I woke I realized it was just a Fanta sea.

I once had a dream that I was swimming in an ocean of carbonated orange juice.

Thankfully it was just a fanta sea.

I went to the doctor today. He told me I was colorblind.

I was devastated. That diagnosis really came out of the orange!

Oprah could be the next President.

Black is the new Orange.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away...

An orange a day keeps the plumber away...

Basically if you throw fruit at people they go away.

I looked at the ocean today, and thought it looked completely orange...

And so then I wondered if it was reality or a Fanta sea.

I asked my buddy if he always puts an orange wedge in his beer.

He said, "Ehh not really. Maybe once in a Blue Moon."

A teacher asked her class to use "definitely" in a sentence.

"The sky is definitely blue," said one girl.
"Nice try but the sky can be black or purple or even orange," replied the teacher.
"The grass is definitely green," said a little boy.
"Well... The grass can be brown too."
Little Johnny raised his hand.
"Yes Johnny?"
"Are farts solid?" asked little Johnny.
Finding this an odd question she was slightly shocked, but answered anyway, "No Johnny."
"Well I definitely pooped my pants."

What's the difference between an orange and the Torah?

One can make acidic juice and the other can make Hasidic Jews

(Just made this up today)

I've just been told by my doctor that I'm color blind

It completely came out of the orange

I recently quit my job at the orange juice factory......

I just couldn't concentrate.

I just got diagnosed with color blindness.

I gotta say this diagnosis came out of the orange.

I was walking past a prison the other day, and

I saw a dwarf in an orange jumpsuit shimmying down the side of the building.

I thought to myself, now that's a little con descending.

You know they say orange is the new black

I guess that's why Trump is president

My friend says to me: what rhymes with orange

I say: no it doesn't

I had this horrible nightmare last night!

It was just horrifying, I was on a boat in a lake, when suddenly my boat tipped over! As I fell into the lake I realized it was orange, orange crush infact! Tasted delicious, but after a minute I started sinking, I was going to drown in a lake of orange crush!

That's when I woke up and realized, it was just a fanta-sea

One of my favorite Reagan jokes:

A Soviet Diplomat goes to one of the farms in Russia, and approaches the farmer.

How are the carrots doing? Said the Diplomat.

Oh, the carrots are as big and orange as ever! Replies the farmer.

I see, and how are the beets?

Oh, sir, if Gorbachev saw these beets, he would cry with joy!

And what about the potatoes?

Sir, if we stacked the potatoes, they would be high enough to reach God!

The diplomat stares for a minute. But comrade, we don't believe in god.

Oh, good. Says the farmer. Because there are no potatoes.

Why did the worker get fired from the orange juice factory?

Lack of concentration.

How is Donald Trump like a jack-o-lantern?

They are both orange, round and should be thrown out in early November.

I was asked to describe the last two us presidents in 5 words

Orange is the new black

Two pieces of Road walk into a bar

They order two large beers and talk loudly, they are the toughest pieces of road in the building.

15 minutes later, a small piece of pavement walks through and asks for a small orange juice. When the roads see him, they move into the corner and stay quiet.

The bartender notices this and goes over to them and says I thought you two were the toughest they come, why are you scared of that small, quiet guy? They respond with:

You should be careful with him, He's a Cycle Path

How are Donald Trump and a jack o' lantern alike?

They're both orange on the outside, hollow on the inside and should be thrown out the first week of November.

Even Tim Cook would have been a better president than Donald Trump

But that is comparing apples to orange

I have found that I have been happier since I switched from coffee to orange juice.

My Dr. explained that it's the vitamin C and natural sugars but I really think it's the vodka.

I just got a new cat. I named him Nothing.

Because he's orange and Nothing rhymes with orange.

How often should you put an orange slice in your beer?

Once, in a Blue Moon.

A guy told me, "Nothing rhymes with orange."

So I replied, "No it doesn't."

Q: Why did the blonde stare at the orange juice bottle for 2 hours?

A: Because it said 'concentrate'

What does Michael Jordan and Melania Trump have in common?

The both made a fortune playing with orange balls

I wonder

Do oranges want to be juice or they pressured into it?

Does anyone else remember seeing the Annoying Orange on YouTube?

I sure do.

He was in the white house for four years.

My daugher told me nothing rhymes with orange. I told her she was wrong...

Nothing and orange have completely different sounds

I had a weird dream the other night that I was on a raft in an ocean of orange soda...

Turns out it was just a weird Fanta sea.

I had a dream last night that I was swimming in an ocean of orange soda.

Then I woke up and realized it was just a Fanta sea.

I ordered a beer at a restaurant that was served with an orange slice.

I told the server "i dont always put an orange in my beer, just once in a Blue Moon.

Did you guys hear about that group of people that's overly enthusiastic about orange, powdered beverages?

You know, the Woooooo! Tang! Clan.

What's the loudest color?

YELL-O!

(Orange ya glad I didn't say red?)

Why did the orange lost the race?

Because he run out of juice

I dreamed that I was swimming in an ocean of orange soda

But then I woke up. It was just a fanta sea.

I used to work at an orange juice factory, but I got canned.

They put the squeeze on me because I couldn't concentrate.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the orange orange hair jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working orange orange tan piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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