The Best 44 Opinions Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Opinions jokes. There are some opinions ideas jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these opinions frank opinion puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 Funniest Opinions Jokes and Puns

They say there's no opinions in science

But I've seen people get real heated over thermochemistry

And they really melt down when you bring up nuclear engineering

Have you seen how twisted people get when it comes to DNA?

Cartography is the worst, people are just all over the map

You should see how hormonal people get about endocrinology

You can really feel the pressure in the room when someone brings up hydraulics.

Today I got bored and went to a seafood restaurant... [OC- would like opinions]

Just for the halibut.

I asked my wife what women really want and she said "attentive lovers"...

...actually she might have said "A tent of lovers", I don't really listen to her needs and opinions.

opinions are like birthdays..

everybody has one & I only know yours because of Facebook.

jokes about opinions

Great minds think alike...

That's why we have so many opinions in America

"Mr. Obama, how exactly does someone impeach a president?" "The american people have made their decision. To suggest we impeach a president before he's had a chance is an outrage! Regardless of your opinions and the flawed system we're under the election was held fair and square...

...Now would you *please* stop asking that, Mr. Trump?"

Some people don't like vegetable puns...

but I don't carrot all about their opinions.

Opinions joke, Some people don't like vegetable puns...

I was talking to a mathematician the other day about fractions

it was fair to say, our opinions were divided

Opinions are like penises

You should be ashamed of yours.

When talking about opinions on border control, Remember:

Lefty loosey
Righty tighty

Pi is very important .....

Without it our opinions would just be onions. :(

You can explore opinions topics reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean opinions opinionated dad jokes. There are also opinions puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

Some people look down on others because they have differing opinions.

Those kind of people are idiots though.

An international conference was being held..

In which USA, North Korea, Europe and Africa were taking part.

The judge said,"I would like to hear your opinions about shortage of food in the rest of the world, if you have any questions, please feel free to ask us".

African president asked, "What is food?".

Europe asked, "What is Short?".

USA asked, "What is the rest of the world?".

North Korea asked, "What is Opinion?".

There are two kinds of people I hate the most...

1. People who want other people's approval for their opinions

2. Karma whores

Upvote if you agree

Political opinions are like dicks....

Sometimes they lean left, sometimes they lean right, and nobody likes it when your crazy uncle whips his out at Thanksgiving dinner.

Opinions are like mixtapes

I don't want to hear them.

Opinions joke, Opinions are like mixtapes

My best friend wrote a book about biased opinions.

It's incredible.

Opinions are like penises,

the only one I care about is my own.

Why do astronauts always have the best opinions?

Because they always have the greatest perspective

Opinions are like sheets.

You should only change yours if it'll get you laid.

Opinions are like mixtapes

I don't like to listen yours

"There is no such thing as 'people'. There are only individuals with their own unique opinions and sentiments"

That's what I've noticed people like to hear these days.

I hate it when people publicly express their opinions needlessly, just seeking attention when nobody cares.

But that's just my opinion.

I recently had a heated debate with a mathematician about fractions

It's fair to say that our opinions were divided

What starts with an "O" ends with "nion" and sometimes makes you cry?


Why can't sunglasses have political opinions?

Because they're so polarizing

Opinions joke, Why can't sunglasses have political opinions?

You know what they say about opinions?

Take away the 3.14159265359 and you have onions

What starts with O, and ends with -nions and makes people cry?


I never put my unpopular opinions on Reddit.

I guess you could say I'm a Karma Chameleon.

Hey, I wanted to recommend this book to you full of terrible opinions from the least-informed people you can imagine.

Thanks, but I already Reddit.

I want people's opinions to help me decide something...

I've just received an automated phone call saying I've won either Β£250 cash or 2 tickets for an Elvis Presley tribute concert. Should I press 1 for the money or 2 for the show?

Friends are like opinions

I don't know why I have them, but there's no way in hell I'm gonna change them

I asked Reddit to letter-grade my looks. Their opinions were wildly different.

I was in tiers.

Why do zombies like opinions?

Because they just want a piece of mind

What is common between Reddit and China?

They both don't like opinions.

China and reddit's societies are similar

Opinions aren't allowed

What starts with O, ends with N I O N S, and makes Americans cry?


On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from his mother. The note read….

"The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents."

My roommates have very strong opinions about lemons

One says lemons are the worst type of citrus.

One says lemons are the absolute best.

Both call them "sublime."

Assholes are like opinions....

I wish my wife cared more about mine.

Opinions are like assholes

I can't get enough of my darling wife's.

Can I tell banana jokes on this sub?

Because opinions on those jokes are pretty *split*. I don't know if they'll ap*peal* to everyone.

Acids have a lot of bad opinions...

They are definitely not based!

As an immigration officer, I may not always agree with your opinions.

But…I can see where you are coming from.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the opinions beliefs puns are supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working opinions feedback piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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