Onearmed Jokes
32 onearmed jokes and hilarious onearmed puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about onearmed that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Onearmed Short Jokes
Short onearmed jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The onearmed humour may include short cliff jokes also.
- New job I recently got a new job assisting a one-armed typist with capital letters. It was shift work
- I've got a new job. I'm helping out a one-armed typist whenever she needs to type a capital letter. It's shift work
- I had a job once. It entailed helping a one-armed typist do capital letters.
It was shift work. - I've just gotten a part-time job helping a one-armed man type capital letters... It's shift work.
- I just got a job typing capital letters for a one-armed secretary She's really nice, but I can't stand the shift work.
- I used to have a part time job helping a one-armed typist write capital letters It was shift work.
- Pick up line for a one-armed gym rat. I go two tickets to the gun show, you want the extra?
- Hey did you hear about this new Netflix series? About a one-armed chef who creates food that tastes like it's already old and outdated. I think it's called "The Hand Made Stale"
- I think this one-armed on a wheelchair is stalking me He's been circling around my house all week
- What's the worst part about shaking a one-armed man? You know that's his m**... hand
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Onearmed One Liners
Which onearmed one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with onearmed? I can suggest the ones about tree and monkey.
- Have you heard about the one-armed super hero? He single handedly stops crime.
- How do you get an one-armed person down a tree Wave at them
- Did you hear about the one-armed man that robbed the bank? He did it single-handedly.
- How do you get a one-armed dumb guy out of a tree? Wave to him.
- What is the easiest way to get a one-armed monkey hanging from a tree to fall? You wave.
- One summer, I worked as an assistant to an one-armed typist. It was shift work.
- Saw a really hot one-armed girl today She was definitely an amputease.
- A one-armed man was robbed The robber said "stick it up"
- How does a one-armed man swim? In circles
- What do you do when you stumble upon a one-armed Polish man stuck in a tree? You wave!
- TIFU by insulting a one-armed foreigner visiting my town. I called him a tourist.
- What does a one-armed Guy search? A Secondhand Shop

Gather Around for Heartwarming Onearmed Jokes and Uplifting Humor
What funny jokes about onearmed you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean balls jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make onearmed pranks.
A one-armed eldery man and his wife step into a restaurant in Paris
The man orders a steak while his wife goes for a salad. The waiter sees the man struggle with his steak, as he only has one arm. The waiter feels bad for the man, but doesn't want to ask him if everything is alright because he might embarrase the man. At one point the man leaves the table to go to the bathroom and the waiter approaches the woman.
"Is everything alright?" He asks. The woman tells him that her husband lost his arm in the second world war when he was fighting in Paris. The waiter tells his manager they've got a proper veteran in their restaurant and the manager doesn't think twice. "Everyone that fought for our freedom eats for free!"
The waiter brings them the good news and the couple is much delighted. After dinner the manager and the waiter e**... the couple to the door. When holding the door open for the veteran he looks at the manager and says "Vielen dank für die guten abend"
