onea Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious onea puns

A one-armed eldery man and his wife step into a restaurant in Paris

The man orders a steak while his wife goes for a salad. The waiter sees the man struggle with his steak, as he only has one arm. The waiter feels bad for the man, but doesn't want to ask him if everything is alright because he might embarrase the man. At one point the man leaves the table to go to the bathroom and the waiter approaches the woman.

"Is everything alright?" He asks. The woman tells him that her husband lost his arm in the second world war when he was fighting in Paris. The waiter tells his manager they've got a proper veteran in their restaurant and the manager doesn't think twice. "Everyone that fought for our freedom eats for free!"

The waiter brings them the good news and the couple is much delighted. After dinner the manager and the waiter escort the couple to the door. When holding the door open for the veteran he looks at the manager and says "Vielen dank für die guten abend"


How do you get an one-armed person down a tree

Wave at them


A One-Armed Bear Walks Into a Saloon..

When he enters, the piano player stops playing, the poker players put down their cards, and the room goes silent. The bear stands in the doorway a few seconds, surveying the saloon, before walking to the bar. Whiskey, he says. The bartender slides a shot glass of rotgut down the bar, which the bear snags with his good arm and gulps down. Another, he says. The bear downs the second whiskey, swivels slowly on his barstool to face the room, and announces, ** I'm lookin' fer the man that shot my paw. **


A young woman is sitting on a train

When two old Italian men sit across the aisle from her. She couldn't help but to listen in on their conversation, and she was absolutely appalled by what she heard. One main said to the other, "Emma come-a first. Then I come. Then two asses, they come-a together. I come again. Then the two asses once-a more. Then I come again, and-a pee twice. Finally, I come-a one-a more-a time." The woman could not help but interrupt and say to them, "Heavens! I can't stand you two dirty old men!" And with that she walks away absolutely livid. The man then says to his friend, "And that's-a how you spell Mississippi!"


How does a one-armed man swim?

In circles


A one-armed man was robbed

The robber said "stick it up"


I think this one-armed on a wheelchair is stalking me

He's been circling around my house all week


What was the one-armed pornstars biggest accomplishment?

She single-handedly Jerked off an entire football team


I remember asking the girl i lost my virginity to,if i was her first one

She said no,she had been with another one,a seven and an eight before..


What does a one-armed Guy search?

A Secondhand Shop


What are the most funny Onea jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Onea? Well, here are the best Onea dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Onea pick up lines to share with friends.


Joko Jokes