Olympic Athletes Jokes
33 olympic athletes jokes and hilarious olympic athletes puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about olympic athletes that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Olympic Athletes Short Jokes
Short olympic athletes jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The olympic athletes humour may include short olympic sports jokes also.
- North Korea is participating in the olympics this year, but they won't win. Because all of their athletes that can run jump or swim are in south korea
- Why do the athletes sweat a lot more at these Olympics than at the last ones? There are no fans. (I'll let myself out)
- Olympics, the new tower of Babel The German Olympian
I met an athlete near the Olympic Park
I asked him "Are you a Pole Vaulter"?
He said "No, I'm German...
and how do you know my name?"
- I met an olympic athlete yesterday... 'Are you a pole vaulter?' I asked.
'No' He replied. 'I'm German, but how did you know my name was Walter?' - My date accused me of lying on my Tinder profile, but what I wrote was absolutely true. I DO have the body of an Olympic athlete. It's buried in the backyard.
- Hear about the first Polish athlete to win an Olympic gold medal? He was so proud, he had it bronzed.
- North Korea athletes... North Korea athletes, who fail to win gold medals in this year's Olympic Games, will have a chance to win gold medals in the next Paralympic Games.
- Why are there so few Mexican athletes in the Olympics? Because most of them who can run, jump or swim are already in the United States.
- A Mexican athlete finally got a medal at the Olympics. The police are still searching for him.
- Which country brought the most competitors to the 2018 Winter Olympics? Brazil. They brought 8 Brazilian athletes.
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Olympic Athletes One Liners
Which olympic athletes one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with olympic athletes? I can suggest the ones about olympic runner and olympic games.
- How many armed men does it take to extort an Olympic athlete? A Brazilian.
- How bad was the Rio 2016 Olympic? None of the North Korean athletes defected.
- Russian athletes in Olympics wont compete under their flag So the tradition continues...
- What do you call a winter Olympic athlete that is being picked on? A Luge-er
- I'm an A-Z expert on Olympics now thanks to Rio! From Athletics to zika!
Share Hilarious Olympic Athletes Jokes and Enjoy Unforgettable Laughter
What funny jokes about olympic athletes you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean olympic gold jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make olympic athletes pranks.
Walter.
I was in the park the other day and saw a guy practising his athletic trials, with a long metal stick for the Olympics. I asked if he was a pole vaulter, and he replied "Nein, I'm German. How did you know my name was Walter?"
At Munich Airport
A young man approaches an Olympic athlete carrying a long pole and asks are you a pole vaulter?
The man clearly annoyed responds no, I'm German, and how did you know my name is Walter?!
Australian Olympic hurdler sees another athlete at the track carrying a long stick and asks him, 'are you a pole vaulter?'
He replies (in an accent) 'No,
actually I'm from Germany
and how did you know my name was Walter?'
Banned From the Para-Olympics
Seven wheelchair athletes have been banned from the Para-Olympics after they tested positive for WD40.
Confusion reigns at the Olympics
A young journalist walked up to a track and field athlete who was warming up for his event to get an interview.
Not entirely sure of the athlete's discipline he asks, "Are you a polevaulter?"
The athlete replied, "Nein, I'm German, but how did you know my name is Walter?"
What did the Russian athlete say when he was stung by a mosquito during the Summer Olympics in Rio de Janeiro?
zika blyat
"I'd like to welcome all the athletes to the Olympic Games"
"I'd also like to welcome the curling teams"
Reporter approaches an athlete at the olympics and asks " are you a pole vaulter?"
Athlete (in German accent) "no I'm not polish, but how did you know my name was Walter?"
Outside of the athletes village at the Olympics I saw a guy walking with a pole vault..
I asked him " are you a pole vaulter ?"
To which he replied "nein, I am German. How did you know my name vas Vaulter?"
Why are Mexicans and Olympic Athletes so similiar?
They both know to sprint at the sound of a gun.
My doctor says I have the resting heart rate of an Olympic athlete,
after they won the 100m.
The hotel gardener.
The was once a gardener who worked in a hotel. One day, he decides to walk in the garden and he spots a 50 pounds watermelon. He continues his walk in the garden to find a tomato as big as a soccer ball. Finding this very strange, he contacts the hotel's director and he takes an appointment with him for the next day.
Tomorrow comes and he meets the hotel's director. As soon as the director finishes his greetings, the gardener says: "Listen boss, I don't care if the hotel shelters the Olympic Games, but please tell the athletes to stop peeing in the garden!
Olympics / opening ceremony jokes
Credit where credit's due - I got these from Sickipedia. I'm brand new here but I gather these would be appreciated...
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I certainly enjoyed the opening ceremony which displayed the history of the early 20th century Britain.
I can't wait until the games are held in Germany.
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So in the Olympic Opening Ceremony, British athletes can walk behind a bloke carrying the Union Jack and everyone cheers...
...But when the BNP do it it's frowned upon.
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My mate asked me: "What is the shortest race in the Olympics?"
After thinking for a few minutes, I came up with an answer:
"Chinese," I replied.
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I'm entering the m**... Tournament in the Olympics this year.
Very stiff competition though.
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As I watched the woman's football today, my wife proudly quipped, "This just shows you how far the Olympics have come, women excelling at men's sports. What do you think this means?"
I don't think "22 blokes are forced to get a take-away tonight" was the answer she was looking for.
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Well done Danny Boyle. Nothing says "London" better than youths setting fire to stuff.
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7 years the London Olympics have been in the making.
Never has it taken so long for a large number of foreigners to enter the country.