Old Mama Jokes
41 old mama jokes and hilarious old mama puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about old mama that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Old Mama Short Jokes
Short old mama jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The old mama humour may include short old momma jokes also.
- What do your mom and yo mama jokes have in common? They're both getting old but are still enjoyed by many.
- Yo mama.. is so old that Steven Spielberg used her as a dinosaur consultant in Jurassic Park
- Yo mama so old.. when she was young the hottest boygroup was Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John.
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Old Mama One Liners
Which old mama one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with old mama? I can suggest the ones about old mom and old grandma.
- Yo mama so old, She remembers the first repost.
- Yo mama so thirsty She climbed Mt. Dew.
-- my 9 year old - Yo Mama so OLD She met Gary Oldman when he was Gary Numan.
\-MPL - Yo momma's so old, Jurassic Park brought back memories.
- Your mama so old She watched the Flintstones live
- Yo mama so old... In school, history was called present.
- Yo' Mama is like a television: even an old man can turn her on.
- yo mamma so old, that on her birth certificate says 'EXPIRED' on it.
- Yo mama so old... Her phone number is 1
- Yo' Mama is so old, she calls her waterbed the Dead Sea.
- YO momma is so old, I slit her t**... and dust came out!
- Yo momma's so s**..., she cooks Indian curry with Old Spice.
- Yo Mama so old, She knew Ye back when he was Kanye
Laughter Old Mama Jokes for Everyone for Fun and Frivolity
What funny jokes about old mama you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean old granny jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make old mama pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Yo momma's so old, they had to take her t**... to the natural history museum to find out what period it came from.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Yo momma's so smelly, an old blind g**... walking by asked her, "Yo, how much for the shrimp platter?"
Three sons left home, went out on their own and prospered.
Getting back together, they discussed the gifts they were able to give their elderly Mother.
The first said, "I built a big house for our Mother."
The second said, "I sent her a Mercedes with a driver."
The third smiled and said, "I've got you both beat. You remember how Mom enjoyed reading the Bible? And you know she can't see very well any more. I sent her a remarkable parrot that recites the entire Bible. It took Elders in the church 12 years to teach him. He's one of a kind. Mama just has to name the chapter and verse, and the parrot recites it."
Soon thereafter, Mom sent out her letters of thanks, "Milton," she wrote one son, "the house you built is so huge. I live in only one room, but I have to clean the whole house."
"Gerald," she wrote to another, "I am too old to travel any more. My eyesight isn't what it used to be. I stay most of the time at home, so I rarely use the Mercedes. And the driver is so rude!"
"Dearest Donald," she wrote to her third son, "you have the good sense to know what your Mother likes. The chicken was delicious!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Your mamma so old that her first Christmas was the first Christmas when Jusse said his first words you a h**....
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
At my friend's house, her dad told us these jokes called "Mama mama jokes." I expected old fashioned "Yo' mama" jokes. I got these.
Mama, Mama, I don't like little brother!
Shut up and eat what you're told.
Mama, Mama, I don't want to go to Hawaii!
Shut up and keep swimming.
Mama, Mama, I don't like going in circles!
Shut up or I'll nail your other foot to the floor!
Honestly, I'm scarred.
An old married couple are driving down the road.
They run over a mama skunk and the wife insists that they go back and pick up the baby skunk.
She says to her husband, "The poor thing is freezing."
"Put him between your legs and warm him up." is the husband's reply.
"But what about the smell?" she asks.
The husband says, "Just hold his little nose and he should be fine."
A banjo asked a fiddle to marry him. "Don't frett," he said. "Just duet and we'll live in harmony until the end of time."
Ten months later, the fiddle started to tip the scales. Her belly was noticeably bowed and before you could say concerto, out popped a minor.
Daddy banjo went to the Hyundai dealer and traded in his old Accent for a brand new Sonata. After just a month, mama fiddle lost her key at the bar and had a break down when she couldn't find it. Apparently it really struck a chord with daddy banjo because for the first time ever, he took a harsh tone with mama fiddle. He drove her home, lost his tempo, strung her up by the neck, and beat her.
Domestic violins.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A guy walks into a psychiatric ward to visit his old man.
As he sits down in the recreation room with his dad, he spots a schizophrenic kid standing on the table.
The kid starts targeting each person in the room, busting out the freshest, most incredible 'yo mama' jokes he's ever heard; true originality at its best.
"That's incredible," he says to his old man, "That kid's got an insane dis ability!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My four-year old just said,
My four year old just said,
"Mama, stop making posts pretending you ever got laid."
I didn't know my dog was this observant.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Look guys... We're too old for yo mama jokes. Let's just keep the moms out of this...
And I'll keep *this* out of yo mama...
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Yo mama jokes have been used thousands of times by thousands of people and are starting to get old
Sorta like yo mama
Advice
A doctor was walking down the street one day when he noticed coming towards him one of his 85 year old patients with a very beautiful, well-built young lady on his arm.
He was looking the happiest he had ever seen him.
When the old guy noticed the doctor he went up to him and said, "Well Doc. I took your advice and look at me."
Puzzled, the doctor asked what the advice was.
"You told me to get a hot Mama and be very cheerful," he replied.
"Oh no. I told you that you had got a heart murmur and to be very careful."
