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Old Coin Jokes

23 old coin jokes and hilarious old coin puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about old coin that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Old Coin Short Jokes

Short old coin jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The old coin humour may include short gold coins jokes also.

  1. While digging a hole today I found a bunch of old gold coins. I ran in to tell my wife.
    Then I remembered why I was digging a hole.
  2. I collect coins and old paper money. For our anniversary, my wife surprised me with a $1,000 bill! Unfortunately, it was from Fendi, for a pair of shoes.
  3. I found an old coin for my collection but can't identify it... ...seriously! I can't make heads, or tails of it!
  4. I was digging up our garden when I found a box full of old rare coins. I was really excited so I ran inside to tell my wife about it. Then I remembered why I was digging up our garden.
  5. Can we start a national walkout for old people who try to pay for things with the exact amount of coins? I've been waiting for change for too long.
  6. So I was digging a hole in my backyard when I found... these really old gold coins so I ran into my house to tell my wife about them, then I remembered why I was digging the hole...
  7. I think my new black neighbours are pretty poor.... you should have heard the fuss they made when their 2 year old kid swallowed a 10 pence coin earlier.
  8. Like changing coins - I always desired to change my 60 old years wife to three 20 years girls!
  9. What kind of coin works at The cheesecake Factory. A penny.
    Heard from a friend's 10-year-old son.

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Old Coin One Liners

Which old coin one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with old coin? I can suggest the ones about dollar coins and copper penny.

  1. I went metal detecting in Germany hoping to find an old coin. I missed the mark though.
  2. What do you call someone who hoards old English coins? A guinea pig
  3. What is it called when the British compare their old coins? A farthing contest..
  4. Caught my 2 year old son chewing on a £1 coin. He has expensive taste.
  5. I found a strange old coin with the faces worn away... I can't make heads or tails of it.

Old Coin Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.

What funny jokes about old coin you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean old but gold jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make old coin pranks.

A stranger gave me a really old metal box...

He said it was supposed to contain gold coins, but the lock and the hinges were so rusty which made it very hard to open. I tried a hammer and a crowbar, but the box just won't budge.
So, I'm thinking of trying to open this box with a stick of dynamite, as a last resort. I'll update you guys later if it works or not.

A man is digging in his garden…

When out of nowhere he finds very old coins that are worth a fortune. He gets so excited he runs into his house to tell the p**... he hired and then he remembered why he was digging in the first place.

The Three Paddies Meet a Wizard

p**... Englishman, p**... Scotsman and p**... Irishman are walking in the woods when they stumble across an old s**... wizard down on his luck. "Wishes for a tenner!" shouts the wizard. "I'll give you anything you like, but I'm sick and tired of making knobs bigger, so don't ask!"
Without wasting a second, p**... Englishman hands the wizard a ten pound note. "I want my wife to be ten times more adventurous in bed."
The s**... wizard nods. "Uxor non inhibitoris! An easy one! It is done!"
p**... Scotsman counts out nine pound coins and two 50 pence pieces. "My wife and I are happy enough, but I'm terrified of becoming a grandfather before I'm 50. I'd be obliged if you could fix it so my teenage daughters can't get pregnant before they're 25."
The s**... wizard nods. "Filiae non fertilismus! Very wise! It is done!"
The s**... wizard turns to p**... Irishman, who has his hands planted firmly in his pockets and looks ready to move on. "No wish for you?"
"I'll save my tenner," says p**... Irishman, with a grin. "These boys have me covered!"

Elderly Woman and Her Cat

An elderly woman sitting on her porch, petting her beloved cat. A genie walks up her sidewalk. "Ma'am, you have lived a happy and simple life, I wish to grant you three wishes."
The woman smiles, "Oh, I have to think, well, I would like to be 18 again." The genie nods his head and she transforms into her 18 years old self. "I would like lots of money!" she wishes. He nods again and piles of gold and coins pile all beside her. The woman stops, "My cat here has been loyal and sweet, could you turn him into a young, handsome man?" The genie nods his head a third time and disappears. Turning around she sees a young man, fit, gorgeous and perfect.
"Why hello" she says coyly. He looks at her, "Don't look at me, you had me neutered."