oils Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious oils puns

Hit by a fastball

A man walks into his kitchen with his hands between his legs
and a pained expression on his face.
"what happened darling?" says his wife.
"I got hit with a fastball at practice" he replies.
"Oh you poor man, come here and i'll massage it better".
So she pulls out his penis and begins to massage with various scented oils.
"how's that my darling, are you feeling better?"
The man examines his bruised finger and says:
"That's great darling, but I still think i'll lose the nail."


Sting has launched his own range of aromatherapy oils.

They're a massage in a bottle


I have now survived 21,364 days and 13 hours without using essential oils or eating kale.

Thank you for your prayers and support during these trying times.


Did you hear about the chef who never understood how animal-based oils help the cooking process? For him....

The Lard works in mysterious ways!


So I ran out of soap a few days ago...

It feels like the most American thing I've ever done: lessening my dependence on foreign oils.


Is America in some kind of pyramid scheme?

'Cause they sure as hell love oils.


My wife got me some essential oils to rub into my beard.

I'm just not sure I need them.


Essential Oils found to help with Polio

They are effective in cases of polio to lubricate the seal between between the one's neck, and the iron lung.


I dumped my kids toys in a bowl full of essential oils

I made Toypourri


Essential oils are bullshit.

I've drank three bottles and now I have a headache AND diarrhea.


What are the most funny Oils jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Oils? Well, here are the best Oils dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Oils pick up lines to share with friends.


Joko Jokes