Ocd Jokes
73 ocd jokes and hilarious ocd puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about ocd that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Ocd Short Jokes
Short ocd jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The ocd humour may include short kleptomania jokes also.
- If I had a penny for every time someone said they think I have OCD... I'd have 1,526 pennies.
- I have CDO... It's like OCD but all the letters are in alphabetical order...as they should be.
- How many people with OCD does it take to change a light bulb? Seven. It *has* to be seven.
- My wife said she was leaving me today because he couldn't handle my OCD any more… I said, "Close the door 5 times on your way out."
- My wife has this weird OCD where she arranges the dinner plates by the year they were bought. It's an extremely rare dish order.
- My ex girlfriend wasn't able to handle my OCD I told her to close the door five times on her way out.
- It's hard dating with OCD... ...every time my girlfriend gets turned on, I have to turn her off again.
- My friend's OCD is really killing his luck with women As soon as he turns them on, he has to turn them off.
- I just found out that a gay friend of mine is OCD He was the last person I expected to get upset about something not being straight.
- My wife makes excuses for stuff by saying she's OCD. Nobody cares if you're a rapper, Margaret.
Share These Ocd Jokes With Friends
Ocd One Liners
Which ocd one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with ocd? I can suggest the ones about paranoia and bowel.
- My fat friend told me I have OCD. I told him he had OBCD.
- It's hard to date a guy with OCD... Every time I get turned on he turns me off again.
- I'm starting a group for people who have OCD. We meet 10 times a day.
- I have ocd so whenever someone say "tho" I always respond with "ugh"
- I have CDO It's like OCD but in alphabetical order, as it should be.
- The worst thing about O.C.D. is that the O should come after the C.D.
- I suffer from CDO. It's OCD with the letters in the correct order.
- I have CDO It's like OCD but in alphabetical order
- My psychiatrist wrote on my evaluation form that I have ocd. I had to correct it to OCD.
- My wife accused me of having OCD I soon put her in her place!
- I talked back to my OCD mother... she was very quick to put me in my place.
- I have OCD and ADHD... So everything has to be just right, but only for a little while.
- People say I have ocd. OCD*.
- If I had a penny every time someone said I had OCD... I'd have 3791 pennies.
- "I'm just trying to get off on the right foot" \- Foot fetishist with OCD
Comedy Ocd Jokes to Make Your Friends Giggle
What funny jokes about ocd you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean compulsive jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make ocd pranks.
I have OCD which severely affects my s**... life.
Every time a girl gets turned on, I turn them off again.
OCD
A Stanford Medical research group advertised for participants
in a study of obsessive-compulsive disorder. They were
looking for therapy clients who had been diagnosed with this
disorder. The response was gratifying; they got 300 responses
the day after the ad came out.
All from the same person.
I just moved in to a new flat with two girls...
I just moved in to a new flat with two girls, it's been a bit of a nightmare to be honest. The first one has really bad OCD, whenever she goes in to a room she has to turn the light switch on and off 17 times. That's nothing compared to the other one, she's got epilepsy
I'm OCD about cleaning up.
There's never any dirty dishes in the sink, the floors are spotless, all the surfaces are wiped down. I even do this if I'm visiting somewhere. If I see a fingerprint or a footprint I just have to take care of it. It makes me a GREAT roommate... but a TERRIBLE crime scene investigator.
My wife is finding it really difficult to live with my OCD
Every time she gets turned on, I have to turn her off again.
My wife said she couldn't deal with my OCD anymore.
I said fine, open and close the door five times and leave.
Obsessive Compulsive...
The representative body that supports people who suffer from OCD have petitioned the Government to change the acronym to CDO in alphabetical order the way it should be...
Why doesn't the guy with OCD ever get laid?
Because when he turns his girlfriend on he has to turn her off again three times.
I asked my doctor if I have OCD because of my compulsive cleaning.
Apparently cleaning your browser history does not count.
What is the first rule of OCD club?
To have a second rule so there is an even number of rules.
A mild OCD Joke
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What's three times worse than OCD?
OCD, OCD, OCD.
Wait the last time didn't feel right.
OCD, OCD, OCD.
Wait, the second time didn't feel right.
OCD, OCD, OCD.
Wait...
There's this guy with OCD who likes to collect containers.
Unfortunately for him, they're always ajar.
OCD
My little cousin has been diagnosed with an unusual case of OCD where all he does all day is organise dinner plates by the year they were made,
It's an extremely rare dish-order........
What does a person with OCD bring out in the bedroom when they tell their partner to bend over?
A protractor.
I have 6 mental illnesses
Schizophrenia, OCD, ADHD, dislexia, anxiety, and hypochondria.
My 8-year-old's newest joke: What did the one-legged man with OCD say when he opened the closet?
Hi, jean!
It's difficult to date someone with OCD
Every time you're turned on, they turn you off again.
it's difficult to date when you have OCD.
Every time my girlfriend gets turned on, I turn her off again.I
(Jimmy Carr)
Who brings Purell and wet wipes to all the good little OCD girls and boys?
Sani Claus.
I wrote the perfect joke about OCD...
as soon as I get the punchline to have the same number of letters as the set-up, I'll post it for you guys.
What's the worst thing about dating someone with OCD?
Once they've turn you on, they have to turn you off again.
Why do people with OCD like Family Feud?
Because it's always black and white.
Never date someone with OCD.
Every time you get turned on, they'll turn you off again.
I have CDO
That's like OCD, but sorted by alphabet,
AS ALL THINGS SHOULD BE
Life is fairly hard for my wife, being married to someone with OCD.
Every Time she gets turned on, I turn her off again.
I just picked up a fascinating new book on OCD.
I literally can't stop reading it.
OCD
Does anyone else find it really frustrating that "OCD" isn't in alphabetical order?
My friend has OCD and says he doesn't like white girls.
Maybe because they can't even
Doctor, i have CDO
Doctor: what's that?
Patient: OCD, but mine is too severe that I put it in alphabetical order
Someone asked me if I had OCD. So I told them...
I have CDO — it's like OCD, except in alphabetical order.
I have CDO.
It's like OCD, but alphabetical... The way it's supposed to be.
My friend has OCD and cleans everything all the time
It is anything but disorder.
This guy with OCD hosted a massive house party.
Things didn't get pretty messy.
