Obsessive Jokes

Funniest Obsessive Short Jokes

Short obsessive jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The obsessive humour may include short obsessed jokes also.

1. My wife and kids are leaving me because they say I'm obsessed with horse Racing. I'm looking out the window at them now........... and they're off.....
2. A man goes on a date Friend: 'How did your date go?'
   Man: 'I talked too much about my obsession with simplifying fractions'
   Friend: 'That wasn't a very good idea'
   Man: 'Yeah, well hindsight is 1'
3. I broke up with a guy years ago due to his obsession with counting... .... I wonder what he's up to these days.
4. My dad is obsessed with The Beatles and is missing just one of their songs from his record collection. He needs Help.
5. The moon landing was staged The moon landing was staged and it was shot by Stanley Kubrick, the reason it looks so real is because of Kubrick's obsession with filming on location.
6. As a child I was obsessed with the difference between cosine and sine As I got older I realized it was just a phase
7. I just realized my wife left me because of my obsession with simplifying fractions. Oh well, hindsight is 1.
8. My girlfriend left me because of my unhealthy obsession with USSR memorabilia... She said there were too many red flags!
9. Why is everyone obsessed with that new horror movie? Like, i was driving today and this is the third time someone has rolled down their window and yelled to me: Hey! Watch It!
10. I wish my girlfriend wasn't so obsessed about her breast size. Even a trip to the car dealership became embarrassing. She told the guy she wanted something that'll get her from A to B.

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Obsessive One Liners

Which obsessive one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with obsessive? I can suggest the ones about compulsive and paranoid.

1. What might you catch an ABBA-obsessed assassin doing? Halving the time of your life.
2. I'm obsessed with seatbelts They're fastenating.
3. Got dumped because she said I was obsessed with boat puns Canoe believe that?
4. My girlfriend hated my obsession with Japanese food Sushi left me.
5. My therapist keeps telling me that I'm obsessed with vengeance… We'll see about that
6. Why are vampires so obsessed with necks? Because they were raised by a neck romancer.
7. I'm obsessed with my F1 key. I think I need help.
8. On a scale of 1 to 10, how obsessed with the Harry Potter Series am I? 9 3/4
9. I am completely obsessed with collecting magazines. What can I say, I have issues.
10. Pi Day confession: I have an obsession with pi. I know, I know... it's irrational.
11. If my wife thinks I'm obsessed with programming, she's crazy. Endif
12. My religious girlfriend is obsessed with cats. She's a Catholic catholic.
13. What do you call a person obsessed with the powerhouse of the cell? Mitochondriac
14. I'm currently obsessed with the Moon Although I think it's just a phase
15. What does a person obsessed with IKEA suffer from? Stock-home Syndrome

Obsessive Compulsive Jokes

Here is a list of funny obsessive compulsive jokes and even better obsessive compulsive puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Me and my friends from the obsessive compulsive support group are starting a rock cover band. We're calling ourselves OC/DC.
• Obsessive Compulsive... The representative body that supports people who suffer from OCD have petitioned the Government to change the acronym to CDO in alphabetical order the way it should be...
• Did you hear about the insomniac, dyslexic, obsessive compulsive butcher? He used to lay in bed at night worrying about why he constantly weighed a steak.
• Recently I bought a really good book about curing my obsessive compulsive disorder. It's helped me so much. I can't stop reading it.
• I'm starting a weekly meeting at my house for people with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.

Amusing & Witty Obsessive Jokes for Laughter-Filled Fun

What funny jokes about obsessive you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean devoted jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make obsessive pranks.