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Numbness Jokes

81 numbness jokes and hilarious numbness puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about numbness that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Numbness Short Jokes

Short numbness jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The numbness humour may include short jokes also.

  1. 1 and 2 went out for a walk in the snow. 1's hands got so cold that they went numb.
    2's hands and feet both got cold, so he was even number.
  2. There's so many bad puns on this sub' it's making me just feel numb, and don't talk about the math ones.. ..they make me feel even number.
  3. Reading all these jokes makes me go numb... But reading mathematics-related jokes makes me go number
  4. There are so many bad puns in this sub it making me numb. But the worst are the math ones. They make me even number.
  5. Did you hear about the guru who refused to let the dentist use Novocain to numb his mouth? The guru said he wanted to transcend dental medication
  6. Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he felt crumby. - my 4 y.o. daughter
  7. A dad joke joke Most dad jokes make me a little numb, except math dad jokes, they usually make me a little number. :)
  8. Tonight I'm planning to watch the movie where Jim Carrey and Jeff Daniels play two math students Numb and Number
  9. Reading all of these dad jokes make me numb. But math jokes... make me number.
  10. What song does skin start to sing after being tattooed for a while? "I've become so numb! I can't feel you there!"

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Numbness One Liners

Which numbness one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with numbness? I can suggest the ones about and .

  1. Puns make me numb Mathematical puns makes me number
  2. English puns make me numb. But Math puns make me number.
  3. Studying History makes you numb but studying mathematics makes you number.
  4. Most of the puns on this sub make me numb But math puns make me number.
  5. Science puns make me numb But math puns make me number.
  6. Most puns make me feel numb. But mathematics puns make me feel.... ........number
  7. While most puns make me numb... Math puns make me number
  8. All of my classes make me numb... But math class makes me number.
  9. While most puns make me feel numb, Math puns always makes me feel number.
  10. Most puns make me feel numb, but math puns make me feel number.
  11. A few puns make me numb But math puns make me number
  12. Maths make me feel numb But divisibility by 2 makes me even number.
  13. Most puns make me feel numb Except mathematics jokes. They make me feel number.
  14. English puns make me feel numb, But math puns make me feel number.
  15. Puns make me numb Math jokes make me number

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about numbness can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of numbness puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Numbness Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.

What funny jokes about numbness you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make numbness prank.

A woman goes to the gynecologist for the first time and is awfully nervous.
When the doctor comes into the examining room, he notices immediately that she's very tense.
"Listen, dear. I know this must be scary for you. Do you want me to give you some thing to numb you down there?"
The girl doesn't say anything, but just nods her head yes.
So the doctor removes her underwear, puts his mouth in her c**....
"Numb, numb, numb, numb, numb..."

Billy, learned at school that everybody has secrets.
So, he decided to take advantage of it.
One day, as he came home from school, he went in front of his mother and told her: "Mommy, mommy! I know everything!"
His mom, obviously scared to death: "Here, take a 100 euros and say NOTHING to your father about it, okay?"
"Okay mommy!" says Billy and leaves the room with a big smile on his face.
When his dad came from work, he did the same to him as well: "Daddy, daddy! I found out everything!"
Numb, his father puts his hand on his pocket: "Here, take a 100 euros and say NOTHING to your mother, okay?"
"Okay!" says Billy with a bigger smile on his face.
The next morning, on his way to school, he sees the Postman.
He thought he could try it to him too: "Mr. Focker, I know everything!"
The Postman, the minute he heard it, fell on his knees and wide opened his arms: "Then, come... Come closer... My son!"

A Girls First Time

As you lie back your muscles tighten. You put him off for a while searching for an excuse, but he refuses to be swayed as he approaches you.
He asks if you're afraid and you shake your head bravely. He has had more experience, but it's the first time his finger has found the right place.
He probes deeply and you shiver; your body tenses; but he's gentle like he promised he'd be.
He looks deeply within your eyes and tells you to trust him-he's done this many times before.
His cool smile relaxes you and you open wider to give him more room for an easy entrance. You begin to plead and beg him to hurry, but he slowly takes his time, wanting to cause you as little pain as possible.
As he presses closer, going deeper, you feel the tissue give way; pain surges throughout your body and you feel the slight trickle of blood as he continues. He looks at you concerned and asks you if it's too painful.
Your eyes are filled with tears but you shake your head and nod for him to go on. He begins going in and out with skill but you are now too numb to feel him within you. After a few moments, you feel something bursting within you and he pulls it out of you, you lay panting, glad to have it over. He looks at you and smiling warmly, tells you, with a chuckle; that you have been his most stubborn yet most rewarding experience.
You smile and thank your dentist. After all, it was your first time to have a tooth pulled.

So three men are stranded in the jungle...

A tribe of cannibals captures them. The chief says he will grant them one last thing before they are eaten. The first man asks for a woman to pleasure him. So the chief brings one of his daughters to pleasure the man. Then the tribe skins him, eats him, and uses his skin for a canoe. The second man asks for a drink to numb his mind before they eat him. So the chief brings him their strongest drink and he passes out drunk. Then the tribe skins him, eats him, and uses his skin to make a canoe. The third man asks for a fork before they eat him. The chief is confused but brings him a fork. The man starts stabbing himself all over and yells "YOURE NOT MAKING A CANOE OUT OF ME!"

A woman meets her friend in heaven

She says Marge!! I didn't know you died! What Happened?"
"I froze to death"
"Oh my God! Was it horrible?"
"Not really I guess...I got real cold, got the shivers, then went numb. I just drifted off. But what about you? I didn't know you died"
"Yeah.crazy thing. I knew my husband was cheating, so I came home early to catch him. He was just sitting there watching TV...but I knew she was there. I ran through all the bedrooms, looked in the closets, under the beds, ran up to the attic...checked the basement...and I had a heart attack!!"
Marge sighs..." Too bad you didn't check the freezer first. We'd both still be alive."

How did you die?

Two men waiting at the Pearly Gates strike up a conversation. 'How'd you die?'
the first man asks the second.
'I froze to death,' says the second.
'That's awful,' says the first man. 'How does it feel to freeze to death?'
'It's very uncomfortable at first', says the second man. 'You get the shakes,
and you get pains in all your fingers and toes. But eventually, it's a very calm
way to go. You get numb and you kind of drift off, as if you're sleeping. How
about you, how did you die?' 'I had a heart attack,' says the first man.
'You
see, I knew my wife was cheating on me, so one day I showed up at home
unexpectedly. I ran up to the bedroom, and found her alone, knitting. I ran down
to the basement, but no one was hiding there, either. I ran up to the second
floor, but no one was hiding there either. I ran as fast as I could to the
attic, and just as I got there, I had a massive heart attack and died.'
The
second man shakes his head. 'That's so ironic,' he says. 'What do you mean?'
asks the first man. 'If you had only stopped to look in the freezer, we'd both
still be alive.'

My kinda Dr.

a woman goes to a new gynocologist for the first time, for her annual pap smear. as the dr.is getting everything ready, and the woman is in the usual position, the dr. explains that there will be some discomfort. he then asks if she would like to numb the area first so she is more comfortable. she tells the dr. *yes please* and he then proceeds to bury his face between her legs and says...num num numnum...

If Only You Had Looked

Two men waiting at the Pearly Gates strike up a conversation.
"How'd you die?" the first man asks the second.
"I froze to death," says the second.
"That's awful," says the first man. "How does it feel to freeze to death?"
"It's very uncomfortable at first," says the second man. "You get the shakes, and you get pains in all your fingers and toes. But eventually, it's a very calm way to go. You get numb and you kind of drift off, as if you're sleeping. How about you, how did you die?"
"I had a heart attack," says the first man. "You see, I knew my wife was cheating on me, so one day I showed up at home unexpectedly. I ran up to the bedroom, and found her alone, knitting. I rushed down to the basement, but no one was hiding there. I ran up to the second floor, but found no one there either. I went as fast as I could to the attic, and just as I got there, I had a massive heart attack and died."
The second man shakes his head. "That's so ironic," he says.
"What do you mean?" asks the first man.
"If you had only stopped to look in the freezer, we'd both be still alive."

A clinic was trialling a new, cheap way to numb a patient for surgery.

The new method involved blunt force trauma to the patient's head.
The strategy was such a success that people would line up around the block to receive the new anaesthetic.
A man asked the doctor what the line was for.
The doctor replied "that's the punchline."

A young teenaged girl has her first trip to the gynecologist...

She gets taken to the examination room and the nurse tells her to s**... down, put the gown on, sit in the chair and put her legs in the stirrups. The girl is a bit overwhelmed, but she complies.
A few minutes later, the doctor comes in, takes a quick glance at the girl's chart and then sits down on his stool, rolls up between the girl's legs, sticks his head under her gown and starts poking around. At this point he realizes the girl's legs are shaking tremendously, so he peeks out from under the gown to see the girl's face turning eight shades of red and covered in sweat.
He quickly grabs her chart again to read it completely, then says, "Oh goodness! Is this your first time at a gynecologist's?"
She nods and quietly replies, "Yes."
The doctor then says, "Well, if you think it'll make you feel better, I'd be happy to numb you first."
The girl shrugs her shoulders and says, "Okay."
So the doctor puts his head back down deep between her legs, shakes his head and goes:
"NUM NUM NUM NUM NUM NUM NUM...."

A man goes to the dentist for a root canal

The dentist asked him if he wanted has or novocaine to numb it.
The man says "Neither. I've only said ouch twice in my life."
Intrigued, the dentist asks him about it.
"Well," days the man, "Once I was out hiking and nature called. So I stepped off the trail and squatted over a log to do my business and set my nuts square in the middle of a bear trap. That was the first time I ever said ouch."
"Sounds horrible," the dentist exclaimed. "When was the second time?"
"As soon as I reached the end of the chain."

I went to my new male Gynecologist and he said to spread my legs so that he could numb it down there. So he went down and went

numnumnumnumnumnum

A gynecologist is preparing to leave for the day...

when his nurse stops him.
"Doctor, we just had a walk-in, would you mind seeing her?"
The doctor steps into the exam room to find the most staggeringly gorgeous woman he has ever seen. After staring for several seconds he collects himself and asks her to please lie back, saying, "Before I begin, I need to numb the area."
The patient looks slightly puzzled, but nods and settles back onto the exam table.
The doctor lowers his face between the patient's legs.
NUM NUM NUM NUM NUM

So I bought cinnamon spray to numb my wife's mouth for s**... purposes. It doesn't work very well.

She woke up anyways.

What do you get if you put morphine on your toast?

Crumfortably Numb!

First time at the gynecologist

It's a girl's first time at the gynecologist. She's up in the
stirrups, and she's very nervous.
The gynecologist says, "You're scared, aren't you?"
She says, "Yes. It's my first time at the gynecologist."
He says, "Would you like me to numb you down there?"
She says, "Please."
He goes (sticking nose in her lap), "Num, num, num, num..."

I just bought a pack of super cheap beer and listened to Pink Floyd.

I have become affordably numb.

The Anesthesiologist has become

Comfortably numb.

Lost my girlfriend due to religion

I'm pretty much numb to beheadings at this point.

There was once a man named Devin

Who thought his home was heaven
He was having some fun
But his hands felt numb
Bush did 9/11

Cold weather makes my hands go numb.

After the temperatures get extremely low, they're just numbers.

A conversation between a psychologist and an anaesthetist was described as .....

..... mind numbing.

7 ate 9

7: "I feel numb now"
6: "And I am a little number"

A woman visits the gynaecologist for the first time...

Her legs are up in the stirrups and she looks very uncomfortable. The doctor says, "You look nervous. Would you like me to numb you down there before the exam?"
She looks relieved and says "Yes, please."
So, the doctor puts his head between her legs and goes num, num, num.

Looks like Chester Bennington's neck

Has a New Divide.
But in the End he's a little Numb.

What did the dentist say to the tooth that wasn't getting numb?

You've got some nerve, punk!

What do you get when you go to a dentist?

Uncomfortably numb

Did you hear the bad joke about the frontal lobotomist?

Frankly, it was mind-numbingly bad.

what does the ominous anesthesiologist say when walking in to see a patient?

NUMB NUMB NUMB NUMB (in the tune of Beethoven's 5th symphony)

A truck loaded with thousands of copies of Roget's Thesaurus crashed as it left a New York publishing house last Thursday.

According to the Associated Press,
witnesses were stunned, startled, aghast, taken aback, stupefied,
confused, punchy, shocked, rattled, paralyzed, dazed, bewildered,
mixed up, surprised, awed, dumbfounded, flabbergasted,
astounded, amazed, confounded, astonished, boggled, 
overwhelmed, horrified, numbed, and perplexed.

A lady goes to a gynecologist for a routine exam

She gets into the gown and positions herself into the stirrups. When the doctor comes in, he tells her that the exam may be painful and asked if she would like to be numbed. Afraid of the pain, she replies, please. The doctor says okay, this will just take a minute . The doctor puts on his gloves, lifts up her gown, begins to put his head between her legs and goes numb numb numb numb...

If you are afraid of gaining weight

then just take a shot of liquor before dinner. Alcohol can numb your sense of fear.

why did the clown wake up with a numb right arm?

he slept on it funny.

I once met an anesthesiologist for a brain surgeon.

They said the pay was great, but the work was mind numbing.

I gave my parrot Lidocaine....

The doctor says his days are numb bird.

One large woodland creature that can't feel pain, four large woodland creatures that can't feel pain, three large woodland creatures that can't feel pain, seven large woodland creatures that can't feel pain.

I know there is a joke here somewhere, but it seems like just a bunch of random numb bears to me.

Two guys lighting up a joint.

After an hour the one is high and the other feels like a seven.
Why?
>!Because the one feels numb and the other feels number.!<
There was also another guy with them who smoked way more that day. >!He felt like an eight. You could say he felt even number.!<

A skydiving instructor tells his student, "After jumping off the plane, count to ten and pull your parachute."

"W-w-what w-w-was th-th-that n-n-numb-b-ber ag-g-gain?"
"Two."

Seven ate six

After seven ate six, it thought to itself, "After I ate nine my mouth felt numb, but this time it's even number".

This guy had a magic door

This guy had a magic door in his house. Whenever he wanted he could open the door and step into a magic world where he was the only human in. Since he was alone in this magic world he was like the king and he could do whatever he wanted to. There was no wife to throw chores at him, no kids nagging and fighting, no dog he needs to take on a walk - no one. He was alone to do as he pleases for as long as he wanted to until his legs get numb and he has to flush down the water and get back to reality.

A truck loaded with thousands of copies of Roget's Thesaurus crashed yesterday

A truck loaded with thousands of copies of Roget's Thesaurus crashed yesterday losing its entire load. Witnesses were stunned, startled, aghast, taken aback, stupefied, confused, shocked, rattled, paralyses, dazed, bewildered, mixed up, surprised, awed, dumbfounded, nonplussed, flabbergasted, astounded, amazed, confounded, astonished, overwhelmed, horrified, numbed, speechless, and perplexed.

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these numbness jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.