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Nukes Jokes

30 nukes jokes and hilarious nukes puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about nukes that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Nukes Short Jokes

Short nukes jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The nukes humour may include short nuclear weapons jokes also.

  1. What do Americans and Putin have in common? They'll both be nuking turkey after Thanksgiving.
  2. Trump to bartender: We are going to nuke Pakistan & kill Mia Khalifa Bartender: why mia khalifa?
    Trump to Imaran Khan: see nobody cares about pakistan!
  3. North Korea has finished nuking the South, and there was one man left alive. He was the Seoul survivor.
  4. A guy wants to build a nuke. He goes to a supplier and asks... "How much are the protons?"
    "A dime a dozen, and the neutrons are free of charge."
  5. North korea should be allowed to have nukes Its the first country to be under total control of someone who's a little boy AND a fat man.
  6. How is the United States and frozen food the same? Kim Jong Un doesn't have the technology to nuke either of them.
  7. North Korea wants nuclear weapons so bad, even their leader is a nuke Little boy and Fat Man
  8. Why would the United States ever consider using nukes on North Korea? When we can just send them all our Samsung phones?
  9. Mike Tyson fires a nuke at his maths teacher. It was a weapon of math destruction.
    I'm so sorry.
  10. Kim Jong un would be great at call of duty If team kills counted twords the "nuke" scorestreak

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Nukes One Liners

Which nukes one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with nukes? I can suggest the ones about nuclear missiles and nuclear bomb.

  1. If Kim Jong Un was a girl... Send nukes
  2. Why do you have to nuke siberia twice? The first one is just to break the ice.
  3. Why is Kim Jong UN so bent on nuking the world? He has no Seoul
  4. Nukes What's the next Muslim country that will have nukes?
    France
  5. Where did Sally go after the nukes were dropped? Everywhere.
  6. Why do asians squint all the time? Because nukes are so bright
  7. How do you reheat a cold war? You nuke it.
  8. I messed up while sexting with Kim Jong Un. "Send Nukes"
  9. What did the U.S president say before starting WW3? Nukes... You're fired!
  10. If your garden gets nuked. Does it become a Gnome man's land?
  11. Why does everybody want nukes? Because they level the playing field
  12. What do you call the fallout from an Israeli nuke? Zionizing radiation.
  13. 2016 is on such a high kill streak I'm worried for when it's going to unlock nukes
  14. What is the best weapon to combat cyber terrorism? Galaxy Nuke 7
  15. If I owned a nuke I would name it Dr. W. Because its a W. M.d.

Nukes joke, If I owned a nuke I would name it Dr. W.

Howlingly Hilarious Nukes Jokes for All Ages to Enjoy

What funny jokes about nukes you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean nuclear jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make nukes pranks.

If hillary nukes Russia I can see the headlines now

"Everyone in Moscow commits s**..."

By tightly securing our Nuclear arsenal through human, digital, mechanical and chemical means, we've been able to almost completely eliminate the risk of nuclear warhead explosions due to accidents or hostile attacks, however if these past four years have taught us something ...

... it's that we also need to equip our nukes with child locks.

My dad works on Nukes and told me this today

What dessert was served during the Manhattan Project?
Yellow Cake

If North Korea nukes South Korea...

It will be Seoul-crushing.

What did Kim Jong Un said to Kim yo Jong

SEND NUKES BABE

Nukes joke, What did Kim Jong Un said to Kim yo Jong