The Best 33 Nuke Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Nuke jokes. There are some nuke reheat jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these nuke korea puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 Funniest Nuke Jokes and Puns

What's the difference between Japanese people and their food?

Americans eat the food after they nuke it.

How do you reheat a cold war?

You nuke it.

Mike Tyson fires a nuke at his maths teacher.

It was a weapon of math destruction.
I'm so sorry.

Two nuclear explosions occur next to each other.

"You're way too close to me" says nuke #1. "I'm Feynman" says the other.

Doomsday device

A doomsday device that will send a nuke to every country on the planet has been developed.

They call it an abombanation.

Let me tell you something I about this Iran nuke deal...


I ran so far away,

I just ran,

I ran all night and day,

I couldn't get away.

Why were the people hurrying to nuke the United States?

They were Rushin.

Nuke joke, Why were the people hurrying to nuke the United States?

What do a nuke, Huldreich Zeingli, and diet pills have in common?

They are implements of MASS DESTRUCTION!

Why do you have to nuke siberia twice?

The first one is just to break the ice.

The prime minister of Japan finally decides to enact revenge on the US for Hiroshima & Nagasaki.

He decides to nuke the rednecks and he calls it: Operation Fried Okra-homa

Why do the Japaneese have squinty eyes?

Do you have any idea how bright a nuke is?

You can explore nuke missles reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean nuke destruction dad jokes. There are also nuke puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

What is the best weapon to combat cyber terrorism?

Galaxy Nuke 7

How is the United States and frozen food the same?

Kim Jong Un doesn't have the technology to nuke either of them.


What's the next Muslim country that will have nukes?

If an African country developes a nuke

will it be called the N-Bomb.

What happens when a nuke falls on your city?

Your life flashes before your eyes.

Nuke joke, What happens when a nuke falls on your city?

North Korea wants nuclear weapons so bad, even their leader is a nuke

Little boy and Fat Man

What happens when you nuke a communist?

Nothing, he turns into gamma rays and keeps being a nuisance.

What do you get if you are nuked by North Korea?

Radi-Asian Poisoning

Why are hot pokets afraid of Kim Jong Un?

Because he likes to Nuke em!

Kim Jong un would be great at call of duty

If team kills counted twords the "nuke" scorestreak

Kim Jung Un called Xi Jinping at 3:30 in the morning.

Xi: Why are you calling at *this* time?

Kim: I am going to test a nuke.

Xi: Okay, when are you going to do this?

Kim: 10.

Xi: 10 what? In 10 months? 10 weeks? 10 days?

Kim: 9.

What do you call the fallout from an Israeli nuke?

Zionizing radiation.

What did Kim Jong Un say after a nuclear war with China?

"when I said nuke the Chinese, I was talking about the left overs!"

What's the difference a bag of popcorn and Japan?

You only have to nuke a bag of popcorn once

A guy wants to build a nuke. He goes to a supplier and asks...

"How much are the protons?"

"A dime a dozen, and the neutrons are free of charge."

Nuke joke, A guy wants to build a nuke. He goes to a supplier and asks...

What would happen if France launched a nuke at you?

Nothing, nothing the French make work on launch \^Ubisoft

What do you get when you nuke a cat?


If I owned a nuke I would name it Dr. W.

Because its a W. M.d.

My worst joke ever told

What do you call the fallout of a cheese nuke? Debrie.

Trump to bartender: We are going to nuke Pakistan & kill Mia Khalifa

Bartender: why mia khalifa?

Trump to Imaran Khan: see nobody cares about Pakistan!

What did the Big Boy Atomic Bomb say to the Nuclear Bomb when they met?

Nuke, I am your father.

Why does everybody want nukes?

Because they level the playing field

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the nuke nuclear jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working nuke wmd piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes