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Notes Jokes

131 notes jokes and hilarious notes puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about notes that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

This article contains funny and entertaining lunch notes, music notes, sticky notes, cliff notes, and lotus notes jokes. Learn how to surprise your loved ones with a joke written on a handwritten note! Explore the probability of making someone smile, regardless of the type of note!

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Funniest Notes Short Jokes

Short notes jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The notes humour may include short remarks jokes also.

  1. My wife left a note on the fridge saying, "This isn't working, goodbye." I opened the refrigerator and it works just fine. Weird.
  2. Security officer: If you find a USB outside, don't bring it into the office Me (taking notes): Note to self: Only bring international bees into the office
  3. What's the difference between a rock guitarist and a jazz guitarist? A rock guitarist plays 4 notes in front of 1000 people, while a jazz guitarist plays 1000 notes in front of 4 people.
  4. Darth Vader: Luke, I know what you're getting for Christmas. Luke: How?
    Darth Vader: I felt your presents.
  5. Where do naughty rays of light go? Prism
    (Note: I made this joke up. Sorry if this little note refracts from the humour.)
  6. Why did the Muslim take his Note 7 onto an airplane? Do I really have to answer that? Who doesn't bring their phone with them when they travel?
  7. Somebody actually complimented me on my parking today. They left a note on the windscreen. It said, "Parking fine", so that was nice.
  8. Don't drink water while studying... Why?
    Because chemistry says that concentration decreases while adding water.
    Note: My first attempt. Thanks.
  9. The new Call of Duty just got released in Iraq They call it the Sims
    Note: this technically a repost
  10. I have a Muslim friend with a Note 7... It only gets awkward when he shouts "Allahu Akbar" when plugging it in.

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Notes One Liners

Which notes one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with notes? I can suggest the ones about memo and comments.

  1. What's a pirate's favorite musical note? The High Cs
  2. i got complimented on my driving earlier they left a note on the car saying parking fine
  3. A note to the mods 🎵
  4. Britain should have written a break up note "It's not EU, it's me"
  5. Someone complimented my parking today! They left a little note that said "parking fine".
  6. I just tried out the Samsung Gear-VR with my Note 7. It was mind-blowing.
  7. What type of writing makes the most money? Ransom notes.
  8. LPT for College: Laminate your notes so your tears roll off of them.
  9. What has a ring but no fingers? The former owner of a Note 7
  10. What has one finger and is very demanding? A ransom note.
  11. What do you call an accordionist who can play more than three notes? A prodigy.
  12. Samsung have done well with the Galaxy Note 7 Sales are blowing up!
  13. What type of writing is the most profitable? A ransom note.
  14. What is Michael Bay's favorite phone? Note 7
  15. Why do cows make terrible accordion players? Because they always milk the notes.

Sticky Notes Jokes

Here is a list of funny sticky notes jokes and even better sticky notes puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What is the worst way to find out you just came into money? via sticky notes
  • The sticky note kept insisting to go on vacation with me. I put him on board.
  • how do you catch a bugler? with a sticky note.
  • What did the e**... novel author get from his editor? Sticky notes.
    What did he get from his publisher?
    A hard copy.
  • Did you hear about the journalists who m**... on his papers? He just got a room full of sticky notes
  • What happened to the journalist that m**... all over his desk? He now has a room full of sticky notes

Lunch Notes Jokes

Here is a list of funny lunch notes jokes and even better lunch notes puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • When I was a kid I used to find sweet notes in my lunch at school But that stopped after they fired the cafeteria worker
  • My dad gave me $20 for lunch today I don't know why, a $5 note tastes the same.
  • How do you know Google is a man? It won't let you finish a sentence without offering a suggestion.
    (Note: might be a repost or not but was stolen from the lunch table so is still a repost)

Music Notes Jokes

Here is a list of funny music notes jokes and even better music notes puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Why did the accordion player go to hell? He tried to outplay the devil in a musical duel, but lost by one too many polka notes.
  • What did the music thief do in college? Take notes.
  • A thief was expelled from music school. It was a bit unfair, all he was doing was taking notes.
  • Why did the music note drop out of college? Because it couldn't pick a major
  • What is the priest's favorite musical note? A minor.
  • I got in trouble in school today I was caught passing notes in music class.
  • What's the difference between puberty and musical notes? Not too much. Tenors can't seem to hit either.
  • Listening to music can be dangerous... Some of the notes are sharp.
  • When a mine shaft collapses it's known to make a specific musical tone when the air rushes through the tunnels. What note is it? A flat miner
  • What's Kevin Spacey's favourite musical note? A minor
Notes joke, What's Kevin Spacey's favourite musical note?

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about notes can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of notes puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Giggle-Inducing Notes Jokes for Joyful Times with Friends

What funny jokes about notes you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean marks jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make notes prank.

A teacher notices that a student is not writing notes in his class

Teacher: "Why are you not writing down notes?"
Student: "I broke my glasses, I can't see the board"
Teacher: "How did you break your glasses?"
Student: "Yesterday, while kissing"
Teacher, curiously: "What!? How?"
Student: "She closed her legs"

Why don't Junior League debutantes engage in group s**...?

Too many thank you notes to write afterwards.

A Frenchman, an Englishman and a Soviet Russian

are admiring a painting of Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden. The Frenchman says, "They must be French, they're n**... and they're eating fruit."
The Englishman replies with, "Clearly they're English. Observe how politely the man is offering the woman the fruit."
The Russian then notes, "They are Russian of course. They have nothing to wear, nothing to eat, and they think they are in paradise."

Why didn't the WASP participate in the o**...?

They didn't want to write that many thank you notes.

A guy meets a h**... in a bar

She says to him, "this is your lucky night. I've got a special going, for $300 i'll do absolutely anything you can think of but the catch is you have to be able to say it in 3 words or less."
The guy replies, "thats a great deal" then slowly lays out 3 &100 dollar notes and says "Paint... My... House."

Why don't debutantes like group s**...?

Too many Thank You notes to write.

I've spent the last hour m**... on the couch.

This psychiatrist seems to be taking a lot of notes.

What's the difference between a pun and a copy of Cliff's Notes?

A pun is a play on words, while Cliff's notes are a word on plays

A tour bus is traveling through Nevada...

it briefly passes by the Bunny Ranch in Carson City.
The guide notes, "We are now passing the largest house of legal prostitution in America"
A man in the back shouts, "WHY?!?"

The Three Professors

Three professors are arguing over who is the best at teaching.
The first professor boasts, "I teach so well, my students never ask any questions. This proves they understand me immediately!"
The second professor responds, "Nonsense! I teach so well, my students never ask questions OR take notes. It's clear they remember the lesson instantly!"
The third professor grins and says, "You're both amateurs. I teach so well, my students don't even have to show up to class!"

So why don't Southern Belles attend o**... any more?

Too many thank-you notes to write

I lost 500 pounds and for some reason people want photos.

I mean it was nothing unusual really, just ten £50 notes!

A depressed man was sitting at a bar.

From across the room, a beautiful p**... saw this man and began to approach him. "Hey honey, are you looking to get lucky?", she asked. To which the depressed man replied "Yes". She then announced that for $300 she would do anything he wanted, provided he could say it in three words. The depressed man agreed to this and slapped three $100 notes on the counter and with each slap he said "Paint. My. House".

Jesus, Moses, and Muhammad are fishing on a boat

As Jesus winds down the fishing lesson, he notes the time. He bids them farewell, and walks across the lake home.
After a while, Moses decided he wasn't very good at fishing, so he parted the lake and went home.
Being the last one left, Muhammed ██████████ █████ ████████████████ ██████████ ███████████████ ███████

Where does N.W.A get their notes on the scattering of photons off of electrons?

Straight Outta Compton

A man has an appointment with a urologist.

The man is sitting on the examination table when the Urologist walks in. The urologist glances at the man's medical history, makes a few notes and then says: "Look, I hate to break it to you, but you have to stop m**...."
The man frowns and says, "Why, Doc?"
The urologist responds: "So I can examine you."

I was watching the film, 'A Perfect m**...,' with my wife

She told me she was getting scared.
"Is it the storyline?" I asked.
"Not really," she replied. "Stop taking notes."

A musician walks into a bar...

... He takes some notes and leaves.

The introduction of Yoga Pants have been found to be the cause of a 0.65 drop in the GPA of Males.

I dont have significant data to back this up, But i have some notes from college that show causation.

A priest, a minister, and a rabbi...

...decide to have a friendly competition to see who is the best at their job. To make things interesting, they agree to see who is best at converting the bears in the local woods. A week passes, and they get together to compare notes.
The priest says, "I was walking through the woods and came upon a patch of berries where there was a bear, gathering berries. I walked up to the bear and I gave him the Holy Communion, and thus converted the bear".
The minister goes, "I too was walking through the woods, and came across a stream. There was a bear in the stream, catching fish. So I waded out to him, and baptized the bear right there, and so converting him."
The priest and minster look over to the rabbi, and this guy is in rough shape. He is in total traction, with a full body cast, cuts and scrapes on his face and hands.
"Oy," the rabbi says, "In retrospect, I shouldn't have led with the circumcision."

Some guy scared me after class and I dropped all my notes

He scared me sheet-less.

Why can't dwarfs sing?

Because they can't reach the high notes.
Bonus: how does dwarves communicate?
Smalltalk.

Why don't Southern girls engage in o**...?

Too many thank-you notes.

Why don't Canadians have many o**...?

Too many thank-you notes.

Roosevelt, Churchill and Stalin are taking a coffee break in Yalta...

Churchill takes out a small black notebook and starts writing something down.
"Taking notes?", Roosevelt asks.
"No," Churchill says, "I heard a new political joke about myself this morning. I collect all jokes about myself. I already have over 100 in this notebook."
"How funny," Stalin says. "I collect all jokes about myself too."
"Oh, really?" Churchill says. "So how many have you got?"
"Three prison camps so far."

An intern is "spanking it" in the laboratory.

A scientist walks into the lab and catches the intern. He is in shock. "What on Earth are you doing?" he asks. The intern does not stop. He takes notes with his other hand and watches the hydrogen ionize. The scientist comes to the conclusion that the intern and the hydrogen are meant for each other; they are both in the excited state.

This afternoon I just relaxed on the couch and m**....

The psychiatrist took a lot of notes.

How do the chinese name their children?

They take a metal bucket (larger for boys, smaller for girls), and roll it down a set of stairs, then take notes of the sounds it makes.

My new band decided to name ourselves after Samsung..

We're the exploding notes.

An old soviet joke.

In a prison, two inmates are comparing notes. What did they arrest you for? asks the first. Was it a political or common crime? Of course it was political. I'm a plumber. They summoned me to the district Party committee to fix the sewage pipes. I looked and said, 'Hey, the entire system needs to be replaced.' So they gave me seven years.

I've made a list of seven notes on how to get to the front page

If you follow the first 6 it will get you a few hundred upvotes but with Note 7 it will blow up

Government - 'Um, we're having big issues with tax evasion. People are stashing away notes with large denominations.'

Modi: 'Have you tried turning them off and and on again?'

How do you make a t**... sound like a French Horn?

Stick your hand in the bell and play a lot of wrong notes.

I know there is something that I need to hang my notes on wall.

Just can't quite pin down on what it is.

Traffic wardens are so nice in my area...

they always leave notes on my car like 'Parking fine'.

The pun-ishment of notes

When notes get in treble, bass-ically they get put behind bars. The alto-nate punishment is to push them off a clef and hope they land flat on sharp objects.

A cop shows up to a gory car wreck (long)

A cop shows up to a gory car wreck and immediately sees several body parts lying around. He takes out his pen and pad to make some notes for his report.
"Left arm - found in ditch"
"Left leg - found in ditch"
~~"Head - found in bulavard~~
~~"Head - found in boulavard~~
*kick*
"Head - found in ditch"

I saw a Norse god discreetly playing 49Hz notes on a piano in space...

I thought to myself: "What a low G low G low key low key Loki."

What's the best way to sneak cheat notes into an exam without getting caught?

Memorise them.

Therapist: do u blame yourself for your parents divorce

Me: not really
Therapist [quietly while reading through notes]: you probably should

A group of amateur bank robbers plan their first heist, but only have post-it notes to work with.

Should be easy enough to pull off.

The wardens at my University were always so nice.

They always leave little notes on my car complimenting me, like, "parking fine".

I hate when songs are just a bunch high notes and whistles

It makes me high key upset

It recently came out that ISIS was developing a bomb disguised as a laptop battery to take on airplanes

They must have been taking Notes from Samsung

A Bass Teacher is excited about getting a new, young student.

The kid is comes in for his first lesson and learns all the notes on the E string.
Next week he comes in and the instructor shows him all of the notes on the A string.
The third week comes, the teacher is waiting, but the kid never shows up. Annoyed, he calls him to see where he is.
The kid picks up and says,
"Oh, sorry man, I got a gig..."

How does a T-Rex take notes?

Shorthand.

Why don't rich WASPy women participate in o**...?

Too many thank you notes to write.

I left three notes scattered around the house for my girlfriend.

I left three notes scattered around the house for my girlfriend. They say Will You and Me That will keep her busy whilst I watch football on TV.

Where do musical notes go surfing?

On sound waves.

I invented a machine that makes money out of thin air.

Even though I programmed it to produce coins, it only spits out notes...
It makes no cents.

Henry David! Why are you taking so long organizing your notes?

I just want to be Thoreau.

Why should you always write love notes in Latin?

It's a Romance language

A bass player joke.

A dad gets his son a bass and lessons for his birthday. When the son comes home from his first lesson dad asks, " what did you learn at your first bass lesson son?"
"Well dad, I learned the first 1..2..3..4...5 notes on the E string!"
"That's great son!"
The next week rolls around.
"What did you learn at your second bass lesson son?"
"Well dad, I learned the first 1..2..3..4..5 notes on the A string!"
"That's great son!"
The next week rolls around.
"What did you learn at your third bass lesson son?"
"I blew it off I had a gig."

Merry 4th of July! The difference between Uncle Sam and Santa Claus is...

Santa Claus gives notes with his presents... Uncle Sam takes note of your presence.

Did you guys hear about all the students that got banned from the Samsung stores

They got caught taking notes

If only whitney houston could hit a baseball pitch as well as she could hit notes and pitch her voice.

She would have had the world's best hAND EYYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEIIIIIIIEEEEEIIIIIIIIIII coordination.

A teenager gets a bass guitar and a month of lessons for his birthday

After he comes home from his first lesson, his mother asks:
What did you learn in your first lesson?
I learned all the notes on the E string!
The next week he comes home and mom asks:
What did you learn this week?
I learned all the notes on the A string!
After the third week the son returns home rather late and his mother asks again:
What did you learn this week?
I couldn't make it, I had a gig

I do embrace change.

But I rather prefer notes.

When I compose songs on my piano, I play multiple notes at once to make my songs longer.

They're extension chords.

My doctor was having trouble writing notes in my chart.

He kept scribbling, frowning, shaking the pen.
I said "Hey, doc! That's not a pen, it's a thermometer!"
He shouted "My God! Do you know what this means?"
"Dear God, what?"
"Some a**...'s got my fountain pen!"

What's the difference between a university student and a mycologist?

The mycologist actually takes notes when mold starts growing in his dirty dishes.

X Æ A-12 not even gonna have any birthday parties...

Elon's just gonna release the patch notes

An irate man was playing the fiddle

He was playing a bunch of mad notes

Marcel Marceau and Charlie Chaplin were booked to perform at a benefit.

Naturally since they were both silent performers, their acts relied purely on physical humor. The night of the performance they were backstage comparing notes and discovered they had planned to do almost the same bits: man stuck in box; man pulling rope; man walking against the wind; etc.
I guess it just goes to show, great mimes think alike.

Did you know they made a movie about a notepad that lost its notes?

It was called Finding Memo

Uber driver came to return woman's lost purse

Woman : Thanks but..it is so weird because I remember it containing only a single 100$ note, but now there are ten 10$ notes inside it. How's that possible?
Man: Yeah because everytime I had gone to return someone's wallet or purse, they said they don't have any change to reward me.

During a zoom band class the teacher asked a student to name different notes. As he was reading them he stopped suddenly and said, "I forgot what note this is"

A bandmate put an F in the chat.

Trump and his family are traveling in a plane.

Trump decides to drop a 100 dollar note from the plane. His wife asks what he is doing. His reply is I want to make an American happy
His wife replies back Why don't you drop ten 10 dollar notes and make ten Americans happy?
Their daughter gives a suggestion Why don't you drop hundred 1 dollar notes and make hundred Americans happy?
The pilot overhears their conversation and gives his own suggestion on the matter.
Why don't you three drop yourselves from the plane and make all Americans happy?

A biologist, a physicist, and a chemist go to the beach

A biologist, a physicist, and a chemist go to the beach for the first time.
The biologist is amazed at the birds, the seaweed, the fish. He goes in the water for a closer look. Pretty soon the water is over his head. He drowns.
The physicist is mesmerized by the waves. The amplitude. The periodicity. The reflections. He goes in the water for a closer look. Pretty soon the water is over his head. He drowns.
The chemist is sitting on the beach making notes in his lab book. He writes, "Biologists and physicists are soluble in water"

A biologist, a physicist, and a chemist go to the beach.

A biologist, a physicist, and a chemist go to the beach for the first time.
The biologist is amazed at the birds, the seaweed, the fish. He goes into the water for a closer look. Pretty soon the water is over his head. He drowns.
The physicist is mesmerized by the waves. The amplitude. The periodicity. The reflections. He goes into the water for a closer look. Pretty soon the water is aslo over his head. He drowns.
The chemist is sitting on the beach making notes in his lab book.
He writes, "Biologists and physicists are soluble in water."

Calculus walks into a bar.

He sits down and orders a pint. The barman notices him scribbling some notes on a napkin and asks what he's writing.
Calculus replies, "Oh this... I'm just working on a new formula..."
"I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to ask you to leave." says the barman, "I can't let you drink and derive".

Notes joke, Calculus walks into a bar.

jokes about notes

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these notes jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.