Nose Jokes

Funniest Nose Short Jokes

Short nose jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The nose humour may include short noose jokes also.

1. My daughter just got me good… I said, Did you know you can always see your own nose and your brain just ignores it? She said yeah because it NOSE it's there
2. Everyone knows about Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer.. But few know about Harold the Brown Nose Reindeer.
   He was as strong as the rest, and could fly as high..he just couldn't stop as fast.
3. Why can't a nose be 30.48 centimeters? Because then it would be .3048 Meters.
   Some jokes just don't translate well.
4. I swear to god if my girlfriend calls me immature one more time... She's never getting her nose back.
5. My five year old just told me this one... Why did the snowman go to the vegetable garden?
   So he could go pick his nose.
6. What do you get when you pick a pig's nose? Hamboogers
   My 8 year old told me this one, i told him it was snot funny.
7. Everybody knows Rudolph the Red Nose leads Santa's sled team... ...but few know that Bruno the Brown Nose is the second in line.
   He can run as fast as Rudolph, but he isn't as quick to stop.
8. Having a big nose isn't a good enough excuse to not wear a mask. Take me for example. I still wear underwear.
9. I met my girlfriend in 2020. She has pretty eyes. I haven't seen her mouth and nose yet, but her eyes are pretty.
10. Why can't a nose be 12 inches Coz then it would be a foot
    Yea I'm an expert at dad jokes but am not dat funny

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Nose One Liners

Which nose one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with nose? I can suggest the ones about forehead and booger.

1. What do a dog and a nearsighted gynecologist have in common? A wet nose.
2. What do you call someone with no body and just a nose ? Nobody knows
3. I store drugs right under my nose Don't believe me? Check my stash
4. Why can't a nose be twelve inches long? Because then it would be a foot.
5. What goes 'boooooo' 'boooooo'? A cow with a stuffy nose...
6. My sister said I'm being immature. I guess she isn't getting her nose back
7. What was the snowman doing in the carrot section of the grocery store? Picking his nose
8. Told my friend his nose was runny He said it's not
9. Never kiss your hunny when her nose is runny you may think it's funny but it's snot
10. If you think having a runny nose is fun... Well, it snot
11. Why do gorillas have big noses? Because they have big fingers.
12. What do you find in an empty nose? Fingerprints.
13. My grandpa said he was built upside down He said his nose runs and his feet smell.
14. Why did the smiley emoji :-) drop the nose :) ??? It was too negative.
15. Why didn't the viper viper nose? Because the adder adder 'andkerchief.

Running Nose Jokes

Here is a list of funny running nose jokes and even better running nose puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• A Jew wakes up with morning wood and runs right into a wall. What does he say? Ouch, my nose!
• You know if you smell feet and your nose is running Then you just might be upside down
• It's allergy season. If my nose keeps running, I'm going to have to buy it new shoes.
• Noses are meant to smell and feet are meant to run, but irl… Noses run and feet smell instead… they switch rolls
  Sadly
• What did the snot say to the nose? I gotta run.
• I was born upside down My nose runs and my feet smell
• My brother was born backwards... His nose runs and his feet smell.
• I wouldn't say I never exercise... Occasionally, my nose runs.
• My daughter said her nose is running. So I made a finish line by the door.
• My nose is tired It has been running all day

Picking Nose Jokes

Here is a list of funny picking nose jokes and even better picking nose puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• I saw a disgusting thing at the grocery today. A snowman rummaging through the carrots?! I mean picking your nose in public? Come on.
• I can't believe some people pick their nose! I was born with mine..
• Plastic surgeons are the only people that actually . . . encourage you to pick your nose.
• Did you ever hear about the guy who could see the future when he picked his nose? His name was Nostrildamus.
• You can pick your nose, and you can pick your friends, but you can't pick your nose's friends.
• People make fun of my nose sometimes, But if God gave me my choice of all the noses on earth, I would pick my nose before I picked anyone else's.
• One of the first things they want you to do before getting plastic surgery is.... Pick your nose.
• A joke told to me by a doctor in a hospital elevator What are the three rules of proctology?
  >!1) Don't shake hands!<
  >!2) No finger foods!<
  >!3) Don't pick your nose!<
• What's the one body part you can choose to have? You can pick your nose.
• "My GF said picking my nose is disgusting", a man told his friend. "So what?" his friend replied. The guy answered "Now I have to do it myself"

Nose Picking Jokes

Here is a list of funny nose picking jokes and even better nose picking puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• If someone asked me to choose my favorite body part... I'd pick my nose.
• What's red, smells, and is often picked in the garden? I don't know either, but my teacher got very angry when I said nose.
• There are 2 kinds of people in the world: (1) People that pick their nose. (2) Liars.
• My son was picking his nose earlier.. I told him to make up his mind and choose one.
• Don't pick your nose and eat it, it may look tasty... But it's snot.
• What do get when a ghost picks his nose? Boooooogers!
• My 7 year old neice told me this joke today What do you do when your nose goes on strike?
  Pick it!
• You could say that I've been blessed with green fingers Or you could say I pick my nose far too much.
• A small part of me really enjoys picking my nose... Can always rely on that trusty pinky finger.
• Defrosting a freezer is like picking your nose It's so satisfying when you manage to pull out an exceptionally large chunk!

Picking Your Nose Jokes

Here is a list of funny picking your nose jokes and even better picking your nose puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• How did Michael Jackson pick his nose? Out of a catalog.
  Heheee!!!
• Life is like picking your nose... Always try to get the most out of it...
• My girlfriend said she's disgusted that I pick my nose so much. I just blew it, didn't I?
• What's the best thing about being Mr. Potato Head? You get to pick your nose.
• Why don't other animals besides people pick their noses? Because they can't.
• What did the Ghost find when he picked his nose? Booooogers
• You know she loves you when she picks your nose. How much is determined by whether she gives it to you or eats it herself.
• Why was frosty in the produce aisle? Picking his nose.
• Why was the snowman in the produce section? He was picking his nose
• Why do horses have big nostrils? Cause they pick their nose with the huffs

Big Nose Jokes

Here is a list of funny big nose jokes and even better big nose puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• A big nose isn't an excuse for not wearing a mask I wear pants you know...
• My girl friend wanted a nose job... So I tried. But her nostrils weren't big enough.
• I don't understand people who say they cannot wear masks because of their big nose I wear my underwear everyday and don't complain
• Is there a correlation between the size of a nose and the sense of smell? Because I read somewhere that back in World War II people with big noses smelled gas much more often.
• Why do Dutch people have big noses? Because air is free.
  ### Bonus joke:
  * How was copper wire invented?
  Two Dutchmen found a penny at the same time.
• When they were handing out noses... I thought they said "roses" so I asked for a big, red one.
• I heard that, on opposite day, Pinocchio's nose actually works the other way around. Big if true.
• One big nose said to the other big nose...."Um I think something is dripping out of you..." And the nose replied, "NO it is snot"!!
• The nose drops „Big smeller" – let´s have a blow-out.
• What has a big nose and no teeth? My mother in-law.

Great Nose Jokes to Share, Laugh and Enjoy with Friends

What funny jokes about nose you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean snort jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make nose pranks.