Northern Southern Jokes
9 northern southern jokes and hilarious northern southern puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about northern southern that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Silly & Ridiculous Northern Southern Jokes to Spread Joy & Laughter
What is a good northern southern joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
What's the difference between a northern fairy tale and a southern fairy tale?
A northern fairy tale begins, Once upon a time, …
A southern fairy tale begins, Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit…!
Once I was walking along the Golden Gate Bridge
Once I was walking along the Golden Gate Bridge and I saw this guy about to jump.
I said, "Don't jump."
He said, "Nobody loves me."
I said, "God loves you. Are you a Christian or a Jew?"
He said, "A Christian."
I said, "Me too! Protestant or Catholic?"
He said, "Protestant."
I said, "Me too! What denomination?"
He said, "Baptist."
I said, "Me too! Northern Baptist or Southern Baptist?"
He said, "Northern Baptist."
I said, "Me too! Northern Conservative Baptist or Northern Liberal Baptist?"
He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist."
I said, "Me too! Northern Conservative Baptist, Great Lakes Conference, or Northern Conservative Baptist, Eastern Conference?"
He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist, Great Lakes Conference."
I said, "Me too! Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Conference, Council of 1879, or Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Conference, Council of 1912."
He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Conference, Council of 1912."
I said, "Die, heretic!" And I pushed him off.
--Emo Philips
Did you know that dogs chase their tails clockwise in the southern hemisphere and counter-clockwise in the northern hemisphere?
It's called the Corgi-olis Effect.
Switch Operator
This guy was applying for a job as a switch operator on the railroad. The engineer was conducting the interview. "What would you do if the Northern Express was heading north on Track 1 and the Southern Central was heading south on Track 1?" The guy thought. "Well, I'd call my brother." The engineer just sat there for a second. "Why on Earth would you call your brother?" "He's never seen a train wreck before."
What did the southern side of the tree say to the northern side when it died?
I'm sorry for your moss
I made this up and I apologise. It's awful.
What is the difference between northern and southern zoos?
Southern zoos have a description of the animals along with a recipe.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
There are subtle differences in the Northern and Southern Dialect
Northern Euphemism for *long d**...*
>My pp is PARTY SIZE
Southern Euphemism for *long d**...*
>My pp is FAMILY SIZE
As a Southerner, this is one of my favorite jokes...
Two men were sitting next to each other at a bar. They struck up a conversation, and it was found out that one man was from the North, and the other was from the South. The Southern man asks the Northern man what his diet usually consists of. The Northerner says, 'Well, the usual things really. Pizza, spaghetti, salads, eggs, etc.'
'Oh, wow that sounds great,' says the Southerner.
'Why, what do you usually eat?' asks the Northerner.
'Everything you eat, just deep-fried.'
Once I saw this guy on a bridge about to jump. I said, "Don't do it!"
Once I saw this guy on a bridge about to jump. I said, "Don't do it!"
He said, "Nobody loves me."
I said, "God loves you. Do you believe in God?"
He said, "Yes."
I said, "Are you a Christian or a Jew?"
He said, "A Christian."
I said, "Me, too! Protestant or Catholic?"
He said, "Protestant."
I said, "Me, too! What franchise?"
He said, "Baptist."
I said, "Me, too! Northern Baptist or Southern Baptist?"
He said, "Northern Baptist."
I said, "Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist or Northern Liberal Baptist?"
He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist."
I said, "Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region, or Northern Conservative Baptist Eastern Region?" He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region."
I said, "Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1879, or Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912?"
He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912."
I said, "Die, heretic!" And I pushed him over.
- Emo Philips
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