Noodles Jokes
113 noodles jokes and hilarious noodles puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about noodles that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Do you have a taste for laughter? Check out these hilarious jokes about all things noodles. From ramen noodles to maggi noodles and wonton, you'll be in for a good time. Read through puns and other humor revolving around chopsticks, impasta and more!
Funniest Noodles Short Jokes
Short noodles jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The noodles humour may include short noodle soup jokes also.
- My lesbian sister told me that most girls are like spaghetti noodles Straight until you get them wet.
- My sister bet me a thousand dollars that I could not build a car out of noodles. You should have seen the look on her face as I drove pasta!
- What do you call someone who steals noodles from the rich and gives them to the poor? Ramen hood
- What's the difference between a woman and a bowl of ramen noodles? A bowl of ramen noodles is actually ready in 5 minutes.
- Two cannibals are lunching. One of them says: "I don't like my mother-in-law."
The other one: "Then just have the noodles." - Opening a new restaurant, focusing on gourmet noodles and spaghetti. We're also going to offer free delivery. We're calling it Send Noods
- I'm so broke, I went to check my account balance at the ATM... And it printed me out a coupon for Ramen Noodles
- Did you guys hear about the ramen noodles without flavor packet? You can't buy them anymore though, they ran out of stock.
- Did you hear about the priest who gave his congregation noodles instead of wafers for communion? He was a Ramen Catholic.
- What do you call a gluten free noodle? An impasta
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Noodles One Liners
Which noodles one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with noodles? I can suggest the ones about ramen noodle and spaghetti.
- What do you call a fake noodle? An ImPASTA!
- Where do poor noodles live? The spaghetto.
- I like my women like I like my ramen noodles Hot, cheap, and Asian
- Dear Lord, thank you for these noodles Ramen.
- How much does 2000 pounds of Chinese noodles weigh? Won Ton
- What do noodles say when they finish praying? Ramen
- What's a cannibal's favorite kind of noodle? Rawmen
- What do you call a noodle in disguise? An impasta!
- What do you call a noodle pretending to be someone else An impasta
- I don't always count the number of pasta I eat... when I do, I use Roman noodles
- Don't eat royal sausage in vietnamese noodle soup Trust me, it's the Pho King Wurst
- What do you call a superhero who's made out of instant noodles? Ra-man.
- What do cannibals on a budget eat? Raw Men noodles
- What do girls and noodles have in common? They both wiggle when you eat them.
- Why are women and noodles alike? They both wriggle when you eat them.
Ramen Noodles Jokes
Here is a list of funny ramen noodles jokes and even better ramen noodles puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What does a noodle say after praying? Ramen
- I just checked my account balance at the ATM It printed me a coupon for ramen noodles
- How do you end a prayer to the Noodle God? Ramen.
- Contest Emcee: Congratulations! You just won a lifetime supply of Ramen Noodles! Me: Can I just take the $20 instead?
- What only lasts 40 seconds for men and leaves them hot and sweaty? A bowl of Ramen Noodles
- How do noodles end their prayers? Ramen.
- What do you call a guy who steals noodles from the rich to give to the poor? Ramen Hood.
- Did you hear that Eminem was opening a noodle restaurant in Tokyo? He *is* very good at ramen.
- How long does it take a tweaker to go shopping? An hour 5 minutes for the Ramen noodles and foil. 55 minutes to fix the squeaky shopping cart wheel.
- The biggest instant noodle company in Japan just went out of business People are calling it the Fall of the Ramen Empire
Hilarious Noodles Jokes that Bring Laughter with Friends
What funny jokes about noodles you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean pasta jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make noodles pranks.
If fresh noodles are noodles, what are expired noodles called?
Oldles.
What does a poor Hindu college student eat?
Brahmin Noodles
What do you call a woman who sells s**... for noodles?
A Pasta-tute!
What did Karl Marx put on his noodles?
Communist Manipesto
What do you call a h**... who likes noodles?
A Pastatute
A woman is at a café orders the soup de jour, which happens to be alphabet soup that day. But when it arrives it just has ordinary noodles...
She says to the waiter, "Hey, I thought this was supposed to be alphabet soup."
The waiter replies, "It's in *cursive* ma'am."
An Indonesian lady offers an Australian guy a plate of noodles
An Indonesian lady wants to offer some noodles to an Australian guy. However, she isn't a good speaker of English. Despite the shortcomings, she goes for it anyway.
"Hey mister! Do you want mee? Still hot you know!"
^^^mee=noodles
What do you call a man who steals large vats of Chinese noodles?
A megalomeiniac.
What do you call a black widow trapped in a bowl of noodles?
Natasha Ramenoff
I can't find this joke.
No, that was not a setup for a joke, I can't remember the original joke that goes something like
"I'm as straight as an uncooked noodle."
"Well even noodles get curvy when things get s**...," or whatever.
I can't find it and I'm frustrated.
Please help. If anybody finds it I'll reply a joke to them.
What kind of noodles do they eat in the hood?
Spaghetto.
What do you call a Muslim ganglord with a penchant for Noodles?
Ramendon
What do cats and dogs have in common
Both taste great with noodles
What's the opposite of drunken noodles?
Soba noodles!
My superpower is to turn into noodles, but it doesn't work when I'm drunk.
I can only do it when I'm soba.
Why did the Udon noodles stop drinking?
They wanted to be Soba...
I heard that a few days ago and wanted to share it.
Why did the noodle hide from the other noodles?
Because he was Alfredo pasta!
Are instant noodles male or female?
Male. Cause they get ready in a couple of minutes.
What does a depressing internet story and Ramen noodles have in common?
They're both sad pasta.
Two cannibals are sitting around eating dinner. One begins to complain to the other, "You know, I really don't like my mother in law."
"Then just eat the noodles."
What do you call noodles that aren't spaghetti?
Impastas
What do you say when somebody cuts in front of you in line for Vietnamese noodles?
Hey, pho queue, dude
I tried to teach my grandma how to eat noodles with chopsticks
She accidentally made a sweater.
said to my wife...
I can make a car out of noodles.
NO YOU CAN'T she said.
...should've seen her face when I drove pasta.
What font does a beef noodle stall use?
Times Niurou Mian
(Niurou Mian = beef noodles in Chinese)
What do you call renters who eat a lot of noodles and ask little of their landlord?
Low mein tenants.
How much do noodles cost?
How much do noodles cost? About a penne.
What do Jamaicans eat when they're on a budget?
Jahmon noodles
Shouldn't we call cup ramen noodles "sodium bowls" now?
Na...
My girlfriend left me because of my love of noodles.
I'd best spaghetti on with my life
What did the sauce cook text to the hot girl working in his kitchen?
Send noodles.
What's the difference between a fake s**... addict and someone who uses fake names to get free noodles?
One's a pseudo-nymphomaniac, the other's a pseudonym-pho-maniac!
How much did those noodles weigh?
Won Ton!
There are 3 people on a roof.
They are Asian, American, and Mexican. They each throw off one thing they have the most of. The Asian throws noodles, Mexicans throw off tacos, and the American throws off the Mexican.
A guy was checking out at a supermarket with an attractive young clerk.
She scanned the frozen dinners, the beer, the ramen noodles and kept giving him eyes in between each scan.
As she scanned the condoms she looks and him and says, "Single huh?"
He replies, "yea, how'd you know?"
She says, "Because you're ugly."
How are women and noodles similar?
They both wiggle when you eat them (:
Two cannibals are sitting around the fire...
Two cannibals are sitting around the fire.
The first one says, I really don't like your mother-in-law.
The other one says, It's ok... just eat the noodles...
What do girls and noodles have in common?
They both wiggle when you eat them.
Bonus: by u/kismetpink They're straight until I get them wet
Bonus by u/Shaded_Trees: They both go limp after being warmed up
I lived off p**... noodles and canned soup for two years.
Now I miss that level of luxury.
What did the Italian chef say on Tinder?
SEND NOODLES
What's the heaviest noodle in the world?
Wanton Noodles.
What do you call noodles cooked with roofies?
Forgetti Spaghetti
I just made these really easy noodles...
I suppose you could call them 'lo main-tenance
How did the mayor of Chicago learn to cook noodles?
With the Ramen Manual
I don't care for much Chinese food, but when I see a big plate of egg noodles I go nuts
I'm kind of a Lo meiniac
What's the heaviest food?
Wonton noodles
This morning I wrote a note on my container of spaghetti that read "Marios noodles" and left my lunch in the fridge...
At lunch, I see Luigi eating my Spaghetti!
I say, "Hey, didn't you see the note?" Those noodles were mine! you owe me a dollar!"
Outraged, Luigi stood and pointed at the crumpled up note. "No a pasta fee!"
What's the most n**... food?
Noodles.
What do you call the place where bad noodles live?
The Spaghetto
What do you call noodles who can't remember anything?
Forgetti
I'd like to apologize for wasting your time with these terrible jokes, just trying to get pasta really boring morning.
I hope my internet points don't take a hit too, that would cost me a pretty penne.
What's a noodles favorite dance move?
A rigaturni!!
Me: I reckon if we got a dog we should call it Noodles.
Wife: That's silly, we eat noodles.
Me: If this recession gets bad enough, yes, we would.
I saw someone eating noodles with some chicken on it.
It was the best hen thai I've ever seen.
What does a Spanish person call spilled noodles?
A derramen.
What do you call it when the chicken overpowers the noodles?
Soup d'etat.
What do you get when you add pool noodles to a hot tub?
Spa-ghetti
I was boiling some noodles until the p**... suddenly began to float.
Needless to say, it was soup rising.
What do you call the fear of Vietnamese soup noodles?
pho-bia
Why are Chinese noodles so easy to love?
Because they are 'Lo Mein-tenance'!
Last night I had a dream I was eating noodles
But when I woke up I couldn't find my earphones
Why are uncooked noodles a cannibal's favorite food?
Because they love rawmen.
What did Yoda say when he saw Luke struggling to eat noodles?
Use the fork Luke!
Two cannibals are eating dinner. One says to the other "I hate my mother in law"
The other cannibal replies "Well, then just eat the noodles"
