Nonstop Jokes

28 nonstop jokes and hilarious nonstop puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about nonstop that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Nonstop Short Jokes

Short nonstop jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The nonstop humour may include short continuously jokes also.

  1. Heart-Attacks are overrated I mean your heart works non-stop all of your life, would it kill you if the poor guy took a break for 5 minutes ?
  2. What's the difference between chris brown and a radio station? Radio stations only have 90 minutes of nonstop hits.
  3. I just learned about the nonstop construction on Big Ben right now They really are working around the clock
  4. I went to the doctor because I have been hearing voices nonstop. Apparently they are called children.
  5. Trump is like Hurricane Matthew The media is talking about it nonstop. Nobody knows how bad it's going to be, but you can't help shake your head at the Floridan who ignores the warning.
  6. What's my grandma & my shower have in common? They turn cold again a half hour after nonstop use.
  7. A 4 letter word for "talks nonstop" I keep trying to enter girl, but it doesn't work.
    I think the writers did this wrong.
  8. My necrophiliac friend finally achieved his boyhood ambition. After years of non-stop studying, practice, and dedication, he finally became coroner.
  9. How is it Santa never loses focus making toys nonstop? He only empties his sack once a year....
  10. Recently my neighbours next door kept b**... on the wall non-stop at 3am.... No choice but I had to call the police... it was so loud I almost couldn't hear my music playing.

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Nonstop One Liners

Which nonstop one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with nonstop? I can suggest the ones about never ending and endless.

  1. I've found a great 24-hour Indian restaurant It's my favorite nonstop naan-stop
  2. The furniture store keeps calling me nonstop. All I wanted was a one night stand.
  3. There was once an emo kid who gave nonstop wedgies. We called him a Wedgelord.
  4. What do you call a film that's entirely in stop-motion? Non-stop motion.
  5. Why do women talk non-stop? Because they don't like periods.
  6. What do you call a nun at a trafficlight? Non-stop

Nonstop joke, What do you call a nun at a trafficlight?

Comical Puns & Laughs: Enjoy Fun, Witty Nonstop Jokes with Friends.

What funny jokes about nonstop you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean interrupted jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make nonstop pranks.

A young korean couple are lying in bed...

When the guy starts f**... nonstop.
The girl, unable to take the smell, says, "Stop, that's disgusting!"
"Don't blame me", the guy says. "It's the dog."
"Oh, don't blame him", she says. "He was cooked perfectly."

Gorilla Encounter

Two gay guys are at the Zoo. They come across a gorilla and notice that the male gorilla has a massive e**.... The gay men are fascinated by this.
One of the men just can't bear it any longer, and he reaches into the cage to touch it. The gorilla grabs him, drags him into the cage and mates with him for two hours non-stop, while the zoo attendants helplessly stand by. When he's done, the gorilla throws the man out of the cage.
An ambulance is called and the man is taken away to the hospital.
A few days later, his friend visits him in the hospital and asks, "Are you hurt?"
"AM I HURT?" he shouts. "Wouldn't you be? He hasn't called! He hasn't written!"

A daughter is seemingly possessed by a d**......

Her mother frantically calls their priest, requesting an exorcism. She describes the details "She has been spinning about wildly, climbing on the walls, running on the ceiling.. moving about non-stop!" The priest replies "I don't know what you want me to do. Sounds like she's already exercising plenty!"

A blonde woman showed up to her doctor's office looking disheveled and with bags under her eyes

The doctor told her that she looked exhausted.
The blonde woman replied, I am. Ever since your nurse told me yesterday that I had to come in for a Blood test I have been studying non-stop

An old man goes to the doctor to complain about his problem gas.

"It's non-stop," the man tells his doctor. "I just have this *constant* stream of silent gas pouring out of me. It might shock you to know that it's even been happening since I came into your office."
"OK," replies the doctor. "The first thing I'm going to recommend is a hearing test."

Cats are just as smart/loving as dogs.

Unbeknownst to me my Mom had a s**... and collapsed one morning. Her cat came running up the steps and meowing non-stop. She ran up and down the steps until finally I followed her down to the kitchen. And there, sure enough - her food bowl was empty

My dad's sister is a geriatric nurse.

With Covid her life has been crazy busy over the past year. She has seen far too many patients die. Now that we have the vaccine she's very excited and gets borderline preachy on why we should all get vaccinated. She talks about it non-stop. It's annoying!
It's like she's become Auntie Vaxx!

Two blondes decided

To drive to Disneyland. Those both jumped into the car and started driving. After 13 hours of straight nonstop driving, they see a sign which reads, *** Disneyland - Left ***.
So they turn around and go back home.

Netflix's latest movie.

Netflix have released a powerful new film set in the 18th century about a princess who's cursed by non-stop m**... . The witch who cursed her says she has before the age of 21 to lift the curse by falling in love.
Honestly, it's a fantastic period drama.

I always wanted to become the world's youngest Elvis impersonator. My childhood was nonstop guitar practice voice training and dance class. I went to countless auditions before ever hitting puberty My performance was flawless but every time but every audition ended the same way...

... they looked me right in my face & said sorry kid you don't have the Chops.

Nonstop joke, My necrophiliac friend finally achieved his boyhood ambition.