No Arms And Legs Jokes
28 no arms and legs jokes and hilarious no arms and legs puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about no arms and legs that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest No Arms And Legs Short Jokes
Short no arms and legs jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The no arms and legs humour may include short no arms no legs jokes also.
- A man wakes up in the hospital after a serious accident He shouts "Doctor, Doctor I can't feel my legs!"
The Doctor replies, "I know, we amputated your arms." - Did you hear what happened to the guy whose left arm and left leg got chopped off? He's dead.
- I'd like to thank my legs for supporting me My arms for always being by my side and my fingers... I could always count on them.
- Awwww If you watch Jaws backwards it is a heartwarming story about a shark who gives arms & legs to disabled people.
- Q. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A. Anything you want, there's nothing he can do about it.
- I would like to thank my arms For always being by my side
I would like to thank my legs for always supporting me
And I would like to thank my fingers because I can always count on them - Shout out to my arms for always being by my side... & my legs for being there every step of the way
- A guy wakes up in hospital after surgery and complains he can't feel his legs "I know" said the doctor.
"We had to amputate your arms" - A man wakes up in a hospital bed and yells Doctor! Doctor! I can't feel my legs! The doctor replies I know, I amputated your arms.
- I saw a guy at an ATM with no arms, and a peg leg He asked if I would help him check his balance... so I pushed him over
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No Arms And Legs One Liners
Which no arms and legs one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with no arms and legs? I can suggest the ones about no legs no arms and no arm no leg.
- I just flew in from Chernobyl And boy are my arms leg.
- What has 4 legs and 1 arm? A pitbull coming from the childrens play ground
- What do you call a man with no arms and no legs who's lost at sea? Bob.
- What do you call a man with no arms and no legs lying in front of your door? Matt.
- What has 4 legs and 1 arm? A happy pitbull
- Vader has a pretty sweet suit. It must have cost at least an arm and a leg.
- What is brown and has got four legs and an arm? A Rottweiler on a children's playground.
- I have 3 eyes, 5 legs and 6 arms, what am I ? A liar
- What do you call a man with no arms and no legs stuffed in your mailbox? Bill.
- How much does a red lightsaber cost? An arm and a leg
^^ - I have 2 heads, 5 arms, 372 legs, and 6684324 eyes. What am I? A liar
- I have 600 legs, 30 arms, a pair of wings, and 1000 eyes. What am I? A liar.
- What do you call the boy with no legs and no arms? Names.
- What has four legs and one arm? A pitbull terrier in a childrens' playground
- What do you call a pirate with 2 arms, 2 legs and 2 eyes? A beginner

Experience Instant Grins & Giggles with Playful No Arms And Legs Jokes
What funny jokes about no arms and legs you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean no limbs jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make no arms and legs pranks.
What do you call a p**... with no arms and legs?
A cash and carry
What do you call a guy with no arms and legs who's swimming?
Bob
What do you call a man with no arms and legs
Floating in a lake?
Bob.
Sitting at your doorstep?
Matt.
What do you call a h**... with no arms and legs?
A night crawler.
What do you call a kid with no arms and legs playing baseball?
2^nd base.
What do you call a man with no arms and legs that falls into a body of water?
Bob.
What do you call a guy with no arms and legs?
Matt
What did the kid with no arms and legs get for christmas?
...Nothing, because he was jewish.
What do you call a man with no arms and legs who rides on a woman's shoulder?
Percy
How many possibilities does a man with no arms and legs have?
Limbitless
A woman who had been married twice and divorced twice was fed up.
A woman who had been married twice and divorced twice was fed up. Her
first husband beat her, and her second husband ran away with another
woman. Plus, she couldn't find a new lover who could satisfy her
s**..., so she put an ad in the classifieds:
Wanted: A good looking, single guy who won't beat me, won't leave me,
and is good in bed.
About a week later, her doorbell rings. She opens the door to find a
man with no arms and legs on her front porch.
"I'm here about your ad," he says.
"You must be mistaken," she says.
"Let me explain," he says. "I can't beat you, I don't have any arms.
And I can't run away because I don't have any legs."
"But," she asks, "How do I know you're good in bed?"
"I rang the doorbell, didn't I?"
A lady on the beach
There was a lady lying on the beach one day who had no arms and legs. Whenever a handsome fellow would walk by her though she would start crying, and eventually one stopped and asked her "what is wrong?"
She replied with "Since I have no limbs, nobody has ever hugged me before."
The man feeling bad picks her up and gives her a long and very satisfying hug. As he sets her down and starts to leave, she starts crying again. So he asks her again "Lady, what is wrong?"
She replied with "Since I have no limbs nobody has ever kissed me before."
The man then kisses her very romantically and loving. Though as soon as he gets up and leaves she starts to cry again, and he asks her "Lady, what is wrong now?"
She replies "I have never been s**... before."
So the man picks her up and carries her into the ocean and tosses her as far as he can. Then he says "Well, you are now."
Woman with no arms and legs.
heres mine a man goes down to a beach and is just walking and sees this woman with no arms and legs crying. The man asks her whats wrong. She replies "ive never been hugged before." So the man gives her a hug and walks away. The next day the man is walking on the beach and sees the same woman crying. Once again the man asks her whats wrong. She says "ive never been kissed before". The man kisses her then walks away. The next day he goes to the beach and sees the lady yet again still crying. "What now?" The man says. The lady replies "well, ive never been s**... before." The man gets so mad he picks up the lady and throws her in the water and yells, "there, now your s**...!" and walks away.

