Nissan Jokes
40 nissan jokes and hilarious nissan puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about nissan that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
From Nissan Altima puns to Nissan Juke jokes, this article has a collection of hilarious jokes about the Nissan brand and its vehicles, such as the Nissan Navara, Nissan Patrol, Nissan Acronym, Nissan Leaf, and more. Read on to enjoy these funny Nissan jokes, and find out if they're better than the jokes about Hyundai, Buick, Mazda, and more.
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Funniest Nissan Short Jokes
Short nissan jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The nissan humour may include short tow jokes also.
- I turned over a brand new leaf today... the folks at the Nissan dealership were not very happy with me.
- Why did the ancient egyptians all love Nissan? Because Nissan Sentra.
My wife says I'm going to Duat for this one.... - My muslim neighbors were fighting over their suzuki and nissan cars. The Ciaz vs sunny problems are getting out of hand.
- What's the difference between an SUV and a car driving the wrong way on a one way street? One's a Nissan Rogue; the other is a rogue Nissan.
- What does an onii-chan drive? A Niisan.
*cue rimshot* - What's a loli's favourite car? A Niisan.
- What car brand is older than you? Nissan
(Nii-san) - What kind of car does the loch Ness monster drive? A Nissan tree fiddy!
- What's the beat car to take your daughter from human traffickers? A Liam Nissan.
- The car makers Nissan are designing a camper van. It's to be called the Nissan Dorma.
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Nissan One Liners
Which nissan one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with nissan? I can suggest the ones about vehicle and dodge.
- What do little sisters love to ride? A nissan.
- What do you call it when two Nissan Cubes get into an accident? A wreck-tangle.
- What's a weebs favorite car? A Nissan
- What does a little sister ride? A Niisan.
- What does a Japanese person say when their older brother crashes their car? Oh, Nissan!
- Should you get a Nissan or a Honda? Altima-tely I'll leave it to your own Accord
- What kind of car does a big brother drive? A Nissan.
- What do you call the world's most badass sedan? A Liam Nissan
- What is another name for a Nissan Cube? A tool box.
- 2% of Japanese have cataracts... The rest drive toyota and Nissan.
- Liam Neeson is making a cameo in the up coming "Cars 3" ...as himself, Liam Nissan.
- I threw up whilst driving on a twisty road... A Nissan Juke had passed me
- What kind of car did Pavarotti drive? A Nissan Dorma.
- What is Darth Vader's favorite Nissan vehicle? The Rogue one.
- What does a Japanese girl ride?? Niisan.
Nissan Truck Jokes
Here is a list of funny nissan truck jokes and even better nissan truck puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Nissan trucks. What, are you expecting there to be a punch line?
- What do you call a car accident between two Nissan pick-up trucks? c**... of the Titans
Nissan Altima Jokes
Here is a list of funny nissan altima jokes and even better nissan altima puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why shouldn't Nissan owners keep antacids in their car? People usually don't respond well to Altima Tums.
Howlingly Hilarious Nissan Jokes for All Ages to Enjoy
What funny jokes about nissan you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean ford jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make nissan pranks.
In celebration of my very first Cake Day, I'm reposting one of my own jokes:
A truck loaded with Worcestershire sauce is driving through Saskatoon, Saskatchewan when it collides with a Nissan Qashqai.
The truck then careens down the road and hits a car from Massachusetts, injuring the two otorhinolaryngologists inside. One of them, suffering from Schistosomiasis, has a myocardial infarction.
A bystander witnesses the entire event and quickly calls to report the accident on his Huawei.
The emergency operator asks the bystander, "What happened?"
"It's hard to say."
A Japanese businessman hails a taxi...
As they go along the highway, a car zooms past by.
"Oooh," exclaims the businessman, "that's a Toyota. Made in Japan, very fast!"
Moments later, another car speeds ahead.
"Ahhhhh," exclaims the businessman again, "a Nissan! Made in Japan too, also very fast!"
Then once more, another car rushes ahead.
"Oooooh," exclaims the businessman, "a Mitsubishi! Made in Japan and very fast again!"
Then they reach their destination.
"Why bill so big?!" complained the Japanese.
"Meter's made in Japan," replied the driver. "Very fast!"
Gambling in Vegas
My friend came back from Las Vegas once. He told me the slot machines are easy to win big at. He went to town in a $20,000 Nissan, left in a $360,000 Porsche.
I thought "nice, I'm going to get in on that." So I left for Vegas in my $30,000 Toyota. Came back in a $800,000 vehicle.
A Greyhound bus.
I've been having trouble meeting girls, so I asked my dad for some advice. He said that if I wanted to break the ice, the next time I go out, I should use this pickup line...
"Ford F-150, Chevy Silverado, Dodge Ram, Toyota Tundra, Nissan Titan, GMC Sierra, Honda Ridgeline..."