JokoJokes

Ninja Jokes

130 ninja jokes and hilarious ninja puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about ninja that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Make Halloween even more fun with these hilarious Ninja Jokes! Get ready for laughs with jokes about dumb, kid and spy ninjas, even from popular characters like Hanzo and juggalos. Share with friends and family to get the whole party laughing at these silly ninja-themed jokes about villains.

Quick Jump To

Funniest Ninja Short Jokes

Short ninja jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The ninja humour may include short samurai jokes also.

  1. My girlfriend is kind of like a ninja attack.. They're two things I'll never see coming.
    (I've never been so proud of myself for writing a joke)
  2. How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. She just holds it in place, while the world revolves around her. * Beverly Hills ninja edit... rotates to revolves
  3. I met a ninja and asked if he could throw those pointy stars that ninjas have. He said, "shuriken."
  4. The Ninja Turtles went to a weapons store. They all got what they wanted except for Raphael They didn't have his sai's.
  5. I'm like a ninja at the gym Cause you'll never see me there
  6. What did the ninja say when asked if he can kill a man with ninja stars? Shuriken
  7. Ninja Joke Can a viking throw an axe?
    Sure he can.
    Can a cowboy throw a lasso?
    Sure he can.
    Can a ninja throw a spinning blade?
    Shuriken.
  8. What's the difference between a ginger and a ninja? One's a soulless killing machine. The other is a highly trained martial artist.
  9. You're the best ninja I've ever seen! And the worst ninja in general.
  10. Can a ninja throw a star? Shur-he-can!

Share These Ninja Jokes With Friends




Ninja One Liners

Which ninja one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with ninja? I can suggest the ones about warrior and samurai sword.

  1. I once went to visit Japan and I haven't seen a single ninja. Impressive.
  2. How does a nonbinary ninja kill people? They slash Them.
  3. When I went to Japan on vacation, I didn't see a single ninja. Impressive.
  4. How many ninjas does it take to... Where did that lightbulb come from?!
  5. How does a transgender ninja kill people? They/them.
  6. Can the ninja throw his ninja stars? Shurikan
  7. Maybe every nation has ninjas And the Japanese ninjas are just the worst
  8. How do non-binary ninjas kill people? They/them
  9. What do you call a red headed ninja? A Ginja
  10. Can a ninja throw a star? Sure he can.
  11. I went to Japan recently, and did not see a single ninja there. Impressive!
  12. What happens when you make a noise in Ninja Church? The nun chucks you out.
  13. Can a ninja throw a star? Shuriken
  14. What do you get when you cross a hippie with a ninja? Peace and quiet.
  15. What is an office ninja's most deadly weapon? The element of supplies

Ninja Turtle Jokes

Here is a list of funny ninja turtle jokes and even better ninja turtle puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I've just been robbed by a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle Though ironically, he wasn't wearing a mask so I don't know which one he was.
  • Why are the Ninja Turtles on the No-Fly list? Because they are members of an underground Splinter cell.
  • Why was the little boy too scared to reach into his Happy Meal for the Ninja Turtles toy? Last time he did it, he got a Splinter.
  • What do you say to the teenage mutant ninja turtle Raphael when he is holding a miniature version of his weapons? Those are the wrong Sais
  • Why do the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles burn all their bank statements? Because they don't want to have a Shredder in the house.
  • What do you call a ninja turtle with an addiction to pastries? Donutello
  • What do the ninja turtles like to put on their toasts? Donutella
  • What's a Ninja Turtle's favorite equation? A radical equation.
  • I got attacked and mugged by a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle I got Attacked and mugged by a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle.
    Ironically, he wasn't wearing a mask, so I couldn't Idenitfy him.
  • Why don't the enemies of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles just flip them on their backs?
Ninja joke

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about ninja can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of ninja puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Great Ninja Jokes to Share, Laugh and Enjoy with Friends

What funny jokes about ninja you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean panda jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make ninja prank.

tell me your best " i was gonna tell a joke about X but Y"

mine is i was going to tell a joke about Wisconsin but it was too cheesy.
ninja

What does a sick ninja practice?

kung flu

Can a ninja bring a ninja star into the airport?

Shuriken.

Did you hear about the world's greatest ninja...?

Me neither.

Best short jokes?

I need a joke for a meeting we have tomorrow at work but I cant remember any good ones after following this tradition weekly for the last few months.
It must be short with just an opening line and a punchline like this:
**Can a ninja throw a star?**
**Shuriken**
The punchline doesnt have to be one word of course, but it cant be a long joke.
Can anybody remember any good ones?

Hopefully you guys get it.

A man was looking for a person to teach him martial arts, so he goes in to see a supposed ninja to ask for lessons. When he walks in he sees the ninja slicing at a fly with his sword, but not being able to kill it. The man says, "How can you teach me martial arts if you can't even hit a fly!?" The ninja then reply's, "Oh, don't worry, that fly won't be having any children."

Joke from my 7 year old cousin - Why did the ninja go to college?

He wanted to be a ninja-neer.

Can a ninja kill you with a hidden bladed circle of metal?

Shuriken

An Interview with a Master Ninja

When questioned on whether he thought his pupil could win his upcoming training match the Sensei had this to say:
"Shuriken".

What do you call a Russian ninja?

Shneakoff
( I apologise, this is my first ever post so I'm using that as my excuse)

Two Ninjas

What do you call two ninjas named Charlie, stranded outside on a cold night?
Numchucks.

What was the ninja pigs' surprise attack called?

Hambush

Can a ninja kill someone from a distance?

Shuriken!

Chuck Norris once flushed a c**...

Three weeks later the ninja turtles were born

When somebody said I could never be a ninja I replied,

"Shurikan"

The worlds best ninjas comes from Iceland

Anyone actually seen an Icelandic ninja?

A guy goes to a fancy dress party with his girlfriend on his back....

When asked what he has come as he tells everyone, "I'm a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle of course"
"What's that on your back then???"
"Oh, that's Michele he replies"

Can a ninja throw projectile weapons?

Shuriken!

What's a German Ninja drink beer out of?

A clandestein.

What movies teach us.

According to Hollywood movies - 1 out of every 5 Americans work for the CIA .
According to Chinese movie- 1 out of every 5 Chinese is a Kungfu master.
According to Japanese movies- Every 1 out of 5 Japanese is a Ninja.
According to Indian movies - Every hero in a movie is a dancer and a singer.

Did you hear that M. Night Shyamalan is making a new movie about a ninja with a n**... f**...?

You'll never see the twist coming

My 4 year old son just got me with a dad joke I hadn't heard before.

My son was playing with his teenage mutant ninja turtle action figures, and was making them fight each other.
Me: "Where are their weapons? Are they just fighting with their bare hands?"
Son: "No, they are fighting with their turtle hands."
Doesn't have a clue why I was laughing so hard.

My friend was r**... by a teenager mutant ninja turtle.

He wasn't wearing a mask, so we don't know which one did it.

Can a ninja throw any pointy object with lethal accuracy ?

Shuriken

I have conversational ninja skills...

People don't notice when I'm talking.

Two ninjas were having an argument

Two ninjas were arguing over which one was the better ninja.
The first says, "Man, you can't even throw a ninja star."
The second ninja says, "Shuriken."

Two ninjas are training in a field.

One ninja says "I'll bet you can't hit that that target with your throwing star."
The other ninja says "Shur-I-ken."

How does a ninja shop for groceries?

No one knows.

Did you know the ninjas have gotten together and formed a union?

They strike from the shadows.

What are a ninjas favourite type of shoes?

Sneakers!!

"Ninja kills Mime"

Nobody heard about it

How does a ninja say hi?

Hiyah

Why are ninjas such productive people?

Because they carry Shurikans not Shurikants.

What did the claustrophobic ninja do when he fell down a well?

He flipped out

Being caught m**... at ninja school means instant expulsion.

They should never see you coming.

What weapon does a ninja use when he just really don't care..

Nun-Fukks

I realized placing a long umbrella on my back does not make me like a ninja samurai...

But more like a Teletubbies.

A ninja, a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar.

The bartender says, Good to see you two 

What do ninjas drink?

WATAAA!!!

'Teenage Mutant Ninja Rapists'

Coming in April

Can a ninja aim precisely?

surehecan

How do ninjas drink beer?

They shogun it.

What do ninjas drink?

WATAH!!!

When I tell people I'm a ninja, they always ask if I can throw a star. And I always tell them

Shuriken

What's a ninjas favorite drink?

Punch

Why can no one hear a ninja f**...?

Because they're silent but deadly.

I would have graduated from Ninja School

But nobody knew I was in the class

Why was the ninja so good at baking pastries?

Because he had a black belt in martial tarts.

What kind of shoe do ninja wear?

Sneak-ers

A Pirate, Rabbi, Ninja, and Giraffe walk into a bar together.

The bartender looks at all of them and asks out loud, "What is this? A joke?!"

A priest, a nun, a giraffe, a telepathic unicorn, 21 pilots, Pennywise the clown, a ninja and Donald Trump walk into a bar. The bartender, struggling to open the champagne, says

...yeah I don't know how I'm going to pull this one off.

What did the ninja say when he was asked if he could do something?

"Shuriken."

What is a ninjas favorite section at the book store?

Stealth Help

What does a ninja say when someone asks if he can use throwing stars?

Shuriken

A ninja is getting ready to fight a samurai

The ninjas friend asks him "do you really think you can kill him without a sword?"
"Sure-i-can"

How many ninjas does it take to change a light bulb?

I don't know, it was too dark to see.

I don't like ninja jokes

I never see them coming!

Why are ninja farts so dangerous?

Because they are silent but deadly.

Ninja joke, Why are ninja farts so dangerous?

jokes about ninja

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these ninja jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.