Nineteen Jokes
10 nineteen jokes and hilarious nineteen puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about nineteen that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Bring a smile to your face with this collection of nineteen jokes about everything from Covid-19 to Epsilon Minus Twentyone. Laugh with friends and family during these trying times with these funny quips!
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Hilarious Nineteen Jokes for a Fun-Filled Night with Friends
What is a good nineteen joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
A bus full of cheerleaders went off a cliff
Miraculously, all twenty of them managed to grab onto the same branch sticking out of the cliffside. There were nineteen beautiful blondes and one brunette. The brunette saw the branch was starting to break, so she made a decision.
"Listen ladies," she said. "As skinny as we are, this branch can't hold all our weight. You're all so beautiful and talented, so I'm going to let go in hopes that it's enough to save your lives. Tell my family I love them."
The blondes were so moved by her selfless sacrifice that they gave her a round of applause.
Parking...
A policeman was patrolling a local parking spot overlooking a golf course. He drove by a car and saw a couple inside with the dome light on. There was a young man in the driver's seat reading a computer magazine and a young lady in the back seat knitting. He stopped to investigate.
He walked up to the driver's window and knocked.
The young man looked up, cranked the window down, and said, "Yes, officer?"
"What are you doing?" the policeman asked.
"What does it look like?" answered the young man. "I'm reading a magazine."
Pointing towards the young lady in the back seat, the officer then asked, "And what is she doing?"
The young man looked over his shoulder and replied, "What does it look like? She's knitting."
"And how old are you?" the officer then asked the young man.
"I'm nineteen," he replied.
"And how old is she?" asked the officer.
.
.
.
The young man looked at his watch and said, "Well, in about twelve minutes she'll be eighteen."
Nineteen blondes go to the cinema...
when the ticket vendor asked why there are so many of them they replied "the film said 18 or over".
I just got a pet raven. I'm going to name him Nineteen.
Corvid Nineteen.
I'm nineteen and won't vote in this upcoming election. Here's why:
I'm Swedish
Einstein, Tesla, Newton, and Pascal are all playing Hide 'N Seek
It is Einstein's turn to be it. So he covers his eyes and slowly counts to 20.
Tesla climbs up a tree, Pascal jumps behind a bush, and Newton stands right where he is and draws a 1m x 1m square around him.
"...eighteen, nineteen, twenty! Ready or not, here I come!" exclaims Einstein. Of course, Newton is the first person he sees so he tags him. "Gotcha, Newton!"
To which Newton responds, "Nope. Pascal!"
A Jewish guy goes into a confession box.
A Jewish guy goes into a confession box.
Father O'Malley, he says, my name is Emil Cohen. I'm seventy-eight years old. Believe it or not, I'm currently involved with a twenty-eight-year-old girl, and also, on the side, her nineteen-year-old sister. We engage in all manner of pleasure, and in my entire life I've never felt better.
My good man, says the priest, I think you've come to the wrong place. Why are you telling me?
And the guy goes: I'm telling everybody!
So I decided to buy nineteen dollars worth of white guilt the other day...
...or as other people call it Twelve Years A s**....
I was thinking about Billy Mays the other day...
I decided he's in heaven partying like it's nineteen ninety-nine ^(plus shipping and handling.)
What's the most ironic movie of the nineteen eighties?
Ferrous Bueller's Day Off
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