Nightstand Jokes
27 nightstand jokes and hilarious nightstand puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about nightstand that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Nightstand Short Jokes
Short nightstand jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The nightstand humour may include short night stand jokes also.
- What does a carpenter do after a one night stand? The second nightstand.
...I'm so sorry. - I always keep a loaded gun on my nightstand in the event of an intruder So I can shoot myself to avoid meeting new people
- I like to keep a gun in my nightstand drawer just in case someone breaks in That way I can shoot myself to avoid social interaction
- Someday I'll open a store that specializes in bedside furniture. The name of the store will be "One" I figure it'll be the only way I'll ever have a "One nightstand."
- Shopping for bedroom furniture while drunk can leave you waking up just having one nightstand.
- I once knew a mexican carpenter who specialised in bedroom furniture, and he always bragged about never sleeping with the same girl twice. Juan Nightstand
- A programmer puts 2 glasses on his nightstand before going to bed, one with water and one without. One in case he wakes up in the middle of the night thirsty, and one in case he's not!
- I made a bold statement by not buying two night-stands for my bedroom. I'm a one night stand kind of man.
- Did you hear about the woman that left her dates house after seeing he had hardly any furniture? She decided she wanted more than one nightstand.
- Got thrown out of the furniture shop I got thrown out of a furniture shop today. I think the girl at the counter misunderstood when I said I wanted one nightstand.
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Nightstand One Liners
Which nightstand one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with nightstand? I can suggest the ones about bedside and standing desk.
- The furniture store keeps calling me back..... But all I wanted was that one nightstand.
- The furniture store won't stop calling me... All I wanted was one nightstand.
- I had one nightstand yesterday.... Thanks to the IKEA sale,today I have two
- A furniture store keeps calling me... All I wanted was one nightstand
- She wanted to sell me a whole bedroom set, but I just wanted one nightstand.
- What did the s**... girl buy at the furniture store? One nightstand.
- What does a f**... by at a furniture store? One Nightstand.
Gather Around for Fun Nightstand Jokes and Laughter with Friends
What funny jokes about nightstand you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean one night stand jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make nightstand pranks.
Headaches
A man and his wife are getting into bed for the night. The man brings a glass of water and a bottle of aspirin to the bedroom and sets it down on his wife's nightstand. She asks him "What's that for?" to which the man replies "That's for your headache." "Headache? I don't have a headache..." The man responds "Well then, looks like we're having s**... tonight!"
My wife and I stopped by the optician's to pick up my new glasses.
Once the optician finished he minor adjustments, my wife looked up at me and said, "Wow, you look amazing! Like Clark Kent!" It made me smile...
We had other errands to run, and the compliments just kept coming; "You look like a movie star! So s**...!" Man, I felt great. In fact this kept up for the rest of the day. I was on cloud nine!
That evening, as we were getting into bed, I took off my new glasses and set them on my nightstand. My wife glanced over at me and said, "Oh. It's you."
Wake-up Call
After a long night of making love, this guy rolls over and was looking around when he noticed a framed picture of another man holding a shotgun on the nightstand. Naturally, he began to worry.
Is this your husband? he asked nervously.
No, silly, she said while nibbling away at his ear.
Well, who IS he then? demanded the bewildered guy.
Calmly, the girl replied, That's me . . . before the surgery
So i brought home a piece of furniture last night...
but it left in the morning without saying a word. It was one nightstand.
My girlfriend said she wanted to experiment more in the bedroom...
I don't know why she got so mad when I put my baking soda and vinegar volcano next to the nightstand.
