The Best 35 Nicest Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Nicest jokes. There are some nicest cleverest jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these nicest meanest puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 Funniest Nicest Jokes and Puns

A minister and a lawyer at the pearly gates.

A minister and a lawyer arrived at the pearly gates. Saint Peter greeted both of them and gave them their room assignments.

"Pastor, here are the keys to one of our nicest efficiency units. And for you, sir, (to the lawyer) the keys to our finest penthouse suit."

"This is unfair!" cried the minister.

"Listen," Saint Peter said, "ministers are a dime a dozen up here, but this is the first lawyer we've seen."

A Very Nice Golfer

There are two men playing golf, at the end of the range you can see a funeral procession going by. As the hearse drives by followed by a few cars one man kneels down, takes off his hat and puts it over his heart, and says a prayer.

The man next to him says, "Well that's the nicest thing I've ever seen a golfer do!" The man stands up says "Well it's the least I could do, I was married to her for 35 years..."

Four guys where getting ready to tee off on the 18th hole when a funeral procession started coming down the road...

...one of the men took off his hat and bowed his head. Another said, "Marty, that is the nicest gesture I have ever seen out of you." Marty replies, "It's the least I could do, we where married for 28 years."

My necrophiliac girlfriend told me I was dead to her.

That is the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me.

jokes about nicest

Who's the nicest player in the NFL?

Drew Brees. The guy's a saint.


What is the nicest thing you can do for someone at a gay bar?

Push in their stool

Someone explain this joke to me?

A nice young hillbilly couple decided to get married. Their parents wanted to give them the best wedding ever, so they reserved the nicest hotel in town. Everything was perfect. After the wedding the newlyweds went to the front desk to check in. The desk clerk asked,"Bridal" and the new husband said "Na, I'll just hold her by the ears till she gets used to it".

Nicest joke, Someone explain this joke to me?

Three Roads To Ruin

There are three roads to Ruin - Women, Gambling and Consultants.

Women are the nicest, Gambling is the quickest but Consultants are the surest!

Bob Ross and Mr. Rogers fight for nicest person ever. Who wins?

They both share the trophy

A Mexican man was visiting America.

He wanted to go to a genuine American baseball game so that when he went home, he could tell his family all about it, but when he got there the game was sold out, so he climbed to the top of the flag pole to get a good look.

"What happened?" asked his family.

"Well, America is the nicest place in the world!" he said. "Before the game started, all the people in the stands, and all the players, stood up, looked at me and said, "Jose, can you see?"

YouTube is the nicest company ever...

They just want to even the playing field so their competitors have a chance to catch up to them.

You can explore nicest shittiest reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean nicest cutest dad jokes. There are also nicest puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Mrs. A was my favorite teacher in grade school.

She was by far the nicest of all of the staph at school.

Which country has the nicest children?

Germany.

German children are kinder.

Anyone ever try Canadian Bacon?

I hear it's the nicest bacon around.

Why is BrO3 the nicest compound?

It calls everyone Bromate.

Jose and the Game.

Jose snuck across the border to America from Mexico and wanted to go a baseball game so when he went home, he could tell his family all about it. When he got there, the game was sold out, so he decided to climb to the top of a flag pole to get a better look. When he returned home, his family was anxious to hear about his experience:

"What happened?" asked his family.

"Well, America is the nicest place in the world!!" he said. "Before the game started, all the people in the stands and all the players stood up, looked at me and said, "Jose, can you see?"

Nicest joke, Jose and the Game.

Why does the Native American always get a table at the nicest restaurants?

He has a reservation.

My moral compass is broken...

...so I got an ethical GPS instead. It gives lousy directions but I always end up meeting the nicest people.

Why should you wear your nicest outfit if you're going to be attacked by birds?

Because you'll want to be impeccable.


In Humanistic Physics, there's a term for the nicest possible path a person can take.

The Mean-Free Path.

...^I^apologize^for^nothing...!

Who's the nicest smelling rapper?

50 scent

The nicest thing you can say at a gay bar:

"May I push your stool in?"

He: "You are the nicest, most wonderful, and most beautiful woman, that I ever met!"...

She: "Ah, you only want to get me in your bed."

He: "And you are intelligent as well."

My mom texted me that she found the incest photo of my sister and I.

I was freaking out until I realized she meant nicest.

What are the nicest words you'll ever hear from a sniper?

I'm gonna miss you.

Who is the nicest person in the Hospital?

The Ultrasound man.

Nicest joke, Who is the nicest person in the Hospital?

My wife just said ' its funny how sex is always better on holiday'

I'll be honest it's not the nicest postcard I've ever received

Who's the nicest bloke in a hospital?

The ultra-sound guy.

Let's try being Nicest together this Xmas eve..

Texted one dyslexic cousin to other.


What's the nicest compliment a girl has given you?

Once a girl told me she wouldn't press charges if I stopped talking to her.

When I was younger I'd always get upset when my dad told me to eat veggies, but now I miss veggies

He's was the nicest dog ever.

I've traveled the world and met people from many countries.

From my experience, American kids are some of the nicest, but German children are kinder

Why is E the nicest letter?

Because all the others are naughty.

What do you call the nicest doctor in the hospital?

The ultra sound guy...

Who covers him when he's not available?....

The hip replacement guy


Who was the nicest Russian leader?

>!Ivan The Bearable!<

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the nicest kenyans puns are supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working nicest filthiest piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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