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Newfoundland Jokes

19 newfoundland jokes and hilarious newfoundland puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about newfoundland that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Newfoundland Short Jokes

Short newfoundland jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The newfoundland humour may include short coast jokes also.

  1. Did you hear about the new Silence of the Lambs sequel that's set to take place in Newfoundland? It's going to be called Ewes Be Quiet.
  2. Hear about that helicopter that crashed into a Newfoundland cemetery? So far they've recovered over 80 bodies.
  3. Cessna 172 crashes into Newfoundland cemetery. Rescuers have recovered hundreds of dead so far.
  4. Yesterday, a plane crashed in a cemetary in Newfoundland There is already 823 deads, but the number will grow as Newfies keep digging.

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Newfoundland One Liners

Which newfoundland one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with newfoundland? I can suggest the ones about vessel and warship.

  1. What is james bond called in Newfoundland? 007:30
  2. What does the Newfoundland fisherman do on a day off? Net fix and chill
  3. What drink do they serve at the Newfoundland seal hunt? Canadian Club
  4. What do you call a dog cartographer? Newfoundland
  5. How can you tell if a Newfoundlander is gay? He eyes the b'ys.

Newfoundland joke, How can you tell if a Newfoundlander is gay?

Comical Newfoundland Jokes and Gems that Will Get You in Laughter Land

What funny jokes about newfoundland you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean province jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make newfoundland pranks.

Tragedy in Eastern Canada

Canada's Worst Air Disaster occurred earlier today when a Cessna 152, a small two-seater plane, crashed into a cemetery early this morning in central Newfoundland.
Newfie search and rescue workers have recovered 826 bodies so far, and expect that number to climb as searching continues through the evening.

Air tragedy in Newfoundland...

A two-seater single engine Cessna 152 crashed in foggy conditions near the Gander airport, crashing into the nearby cemetery.
Newfie rescue squads have recovered 385 bodies so far, and that number is expected to climb as digging continues.

A man from quebec and a man from Newfoundland meet in a bar....

A man from Quebec and a man from Newfoundland meet in a bar, one of them finds a lamp, he rubs it and a genie comes out, he grants the two with one wish each.
the guy from Quebec says "i want a big, 40 foot wall arround the entire province"
the genie claps his fingers and says "here, done"
the one from Newfoundland aks "is your wall waterproof?"
"uhh yeah?" responded the guy from quebec
"fill her up"

I tried to translate a joke from Canadian

Did you hear about the war between Nova Scotia and Newfoundland?. ? The newfies were throwing grenades the Nova Scotians were pulling the pins and throwing them back

Canada's worst air disaster occurred earlier this morning when a Cessna 152 (a small two-seater plane) crashed into a cemetery in central Newfoundland.

Newfie search and rescue workers have recovered 825 bodies so far, and expect that number to climb as digging continues into the evening.

A man gets pulled over in Newfoundland

The cop looks at his licence, looks at the man, looks at the licence again and looks at the man once more.
Cop - sir, you need to be wearing glasses!
Man - I have contacts.
Cop - sir, I don't care who you know, you need to be wearing glasses!

My 91 year old Canadian Grandmother just told me this joke.

Two Newfoundlanders were driving to Toronto.
They passed a sign that said: Toronto LEFT.
Distraught, they turned around and drove back home.

A man goes to the doctor and tells the doctor

"Please doc you have to help me. Everywhere I touch my self it hurts. If I touch my leg, ow that hurts, if I touch my arm, ow that hurts. If I touch my head ow that hurts.
Doctor looks him over and asks him " Sir where are you from?"
The guys says "I from Newfoundland"
The Doctor says "Son your fingers broken!"

Newfoundland joke, What drink do they serve at the Newfoundland seal hunt?