Newell Jokes

Following is our collection of difference puns and past one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. Including Newell jokes for adults, dirty world jokes and clean make dad gags for kids.

The Best Newell Puns

Gabe Newell should be president

That way we'd never have WW3.

A woman is at the park with her son when he starts misbehaving.

She looks at him sternly and says "If you don't stop before I count to 3, we're going home!"



2 and a half...

2 and three quarters...

2 and five sevenths...

Just then a man taps her on the shoulder and hands her his business card. Hi I work for Gabe Newell, co-founder of Valve, and we're looking for a new Vice President. I think you're just what we're looking for. Call me on Monday and we'll talk.

I don't know if Gabe Newell would be a very good president.

But at least there won't be a world war 3.

Why would Gabe Newell be a good president?

Because then World War 3 would never happen

I vote Gabe Newell for president.

There will never be a World War 3.

Why doesn't Gabe Newell play basketball?

Because he can't make 3's

Why should we elect Gabe Newell as President of the United States?

So there won't be a World War III.

The American people should elect Gabe Newell president in 2020.

That way we can be 100% certain the President of the United States will not start World War III.

Gabe Newell should be the World President

He will prevent World War 3.

Gabe Newell and Bill Gates should get together.

Not only would there be some epic games, they could comfort each other's inability to count.

Why doesn't Gabe Newell have kids?

He can't get to 3rd base

Why would Gabe Newell be a better world leader than Hitler?

There'd be no World War 3.

Why should we make Gabe Newell president?

There won't be any World War 3.


Gabe Newell is an anti-vaxer

he doesn't let his creations get to 3

There is an abundance of elect jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 14 funniest jokes and newell puns. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any toddler witze you can hear about newell.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

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