Newell Jokes

Humoristic puns and funny pick up lines

Gabe Newell should be president

That way we'd never have WW3.

A woman is at the park with her son when he starts misbehaving.

She looks at him sternly and says "If you don't stop before I count to 3, we're going home!"



2 and a half...

2 and three quarters...

2 and five sevenths...

Just then a man taps her on the shoulder and hands her his business card. Hi I work for Gabe Newell, co-founder of Valve, and we're looking for a new Vice President. I think you're just what we're looking for. Call me on Monday and we'll talk.

I don't know if Gabe Newell would be a very good president.

But at least there won't be a world war 3.

Why would Gabe Newell be a good president?

Because then World War 3 would never happen

I vote Gabe Newell for president.

There will never be a World War 3.

Why doesn't Gabe Newell play basketball?

Because he can't make 3's

Why should we elect Gabe Newell as President of the United States?

So there won't be a World War III.

The American people should elect Gabe Newell president in 2020.

That way we can be 100% certain the President of the United States will not start World War III.

Gabe Newell should be the World President

He will prevent World War 3.

Gabe Newell and Bill Gates should get together.

Not only would there be some epic games, they could comfort each other's inability to count.

Why doesn't Gabe Newell have kids?

He can't get to 3rd base

Why would Gabe Newell be a better world leader than Hitler?

There'd be no World War 3.

Why should we make Gabe Newell president?

There won't be any World War 3.


What are the funniest newell jokes of all time?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking about Newell? Well, here are the best Newell puns to laugh out loud. Crazy and funny Newell pick up lines to share with friends.


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