New Testament Jokes
15 new testament jokes and hilarious new testament puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about new testament that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest New Testament Short Jokes
Short new testament jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The new testament humour may include short christian bible jokes also.
- My Sunday School teacher is so old... .. when the New Testament came out she said "I don't care for the new curriculum."
- What do you get if you combine the old testament, the new testament and Swiss cheese? The Holey Bible.
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New Testament One Liners
Which new testament one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with new testament? I can suggest the ones about old testament and bible.
- Who says sequels don't work? Look at the fanbase of the New Testament!
- Why don't Jews believe in the New Testament? They're not buying it
- What was Jesus's first text message? NEW TESTAMENT WHO DIS?
- Why don't Jews read the New Testament? Because there's no prophet
Charming Humor New Testament Jokes with Loads of Fun
What funny jokes about new testament you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean testament jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make new testament pranks.
A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning....
The wife claims, "You should do it, because you get up first and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee."
The husband says, "You are in charge of cooking around here so you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee."
The wife replied, "No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should make the coffee."
The husband replied, "I can't believe that; show me!"
So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says..........
"HEBREWS"
A crying jewish man goes to the synagogue
He stumbles to the floor and just lies there, sobbing and crying.
Suddenly he hears a voice from above: "What's wrong my child?".
"Oh", cries the man, "it is horrible. My son got baptized."
"Happened to me too", says the voice. "In the end I had to write a New Testament".
PS: Translation of a German joke, I hope it still works in English.
Morris had died. His lawyer is standing before the family and reads out Morris' Last Will and Testament.
Morris had died. His lawyer is standing before the family and reads out Morris' Last Will and Testament.
"To my dear wife Esther, I leave the house, 150 acres of land, and 1 million dollars.
To my son Barry, I leave my Big Lexus and the new Jaguar.
To my daughter Shirley, I leave my yacht and $250,000.
And to my brother-in-law Aaron, who always insisted that health is better than wealth, I leave my treadmill."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How do we know that god is jewish?
Well, when his son became a christian he issued a new testament.
Coffee Dilemma
A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning.
The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee".
The husband said, " You are in charge of the cooking around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee."
Wife replies, "No you should do it, and besides it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee."
Husband replies, " I can't believe that, show me."
So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and shows him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says:
"HEBREWS"
