JokoJokes

Neglect Jokes

21 neglect jokes and hilarious neglect puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about neglect that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Quick Jump To

Funniest Neglect Short Jokes

Short neglect jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The neglect humour may include short ignorance jokes also.

  1. My baby daughter said her first word today! She said Neglect!
    Or something like that at least. I don't remember, I wasn't really paying attention.
  2. Having a cat is just like having a girlfriend ... They both
    * wail and moan when you neglect to feed them
    * bite and scratch when you try to pet them
    * keep escaping from the basement
  3. Is it ok to ignore dumplings in my Chinese takeout? Or will I be charged with wonton neglect?
  4. Jesus Christ, 12 years old, steps out of his home but neglects to close the door behind him. Mary: Hold on, son! Were you born in a barn?
  5. Check your emails more often Turns out my DNA ancestry results came back 100% Nigerian and I've been neglecting my royal prince cousin for years
  6. When the coroner's report came back, it stated my nine month old son had died due to neglect… Nothing to do with me though, I was at the bar at the time…
  7. Tyson Chicken Factory Farm Caught On Hidden Camera Torturing And Neglecting Animals I guess they were caught choking the chicken?
  8. My wife said I was a neglectful father. So I told my kid I would take him to a summer camp. Now I get a free ride back to guatemala and my wife can take it up with Trump from now on.
  9. CHRISTMAS BONUS Boss: Who said that just because I tried to kiss you at last month's Christmas party, you could neglect to do your work around here?
    Secretary: My lawyer.
  10. Sigmund Freud in a slam battle: "Yo' mamma's so neglectful, you struggle to maintain relationships with women because they view you as overly attached and clingy."

Share These Neglect Jokes With Friends




Neglect One Liners

Which neglect one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with neglect? I can suggest the ones about ignore and careless.

  1. My wife said that our son feels neglected. I didn't even know we had a son.
  2. What happens when you neglect to pay your exorcist? You get repossessed.
  3. Why are all engineers atheist? They neglect the higher order.
  4. You can't tell me I neglect my children. Nobody else knows where they are either.
  5. Why do engineers make horrible parents? Because they're taught to neglect everything.
  6. Why did the Republican neglect his dog? He was afraid it would become well socialized.
  7. My wife said that our son feels neglected. "Who?" I asked.
  8. Dude ...like...homeless neglected dogs totally ruined that Sarah McLachlan song for me.
  9. What do you call a man on your porch? Mat. I neglected to mention he has no arms or legs.
  10. Why'd the air resistance committed s**...? Because he's always being neglected

Neglect joke, Why'd the air resistance committed s**...?

Charming Humor Neglect Jokes with Loads of Fun

What funny jokes about neglect you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean poverty jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make neglect pranks.

After 30 years of marriage...

After 30 years of marriage a husband and wife came for counseling. When asked what the problem was, the wife went into a tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the years they had been married. On and on she went: Neglect, lack of intimacy, emptiness, loneliness, feeling unloved and unlovable, and entire laundry list of unmet needs she had endured.
Finally, after allowing this for a sufficient length of time, the therapist got up, walked around the desk and after asking the wife to stand, he embraced and kissed her long and passionately as her husband watched - with a raised eyebrow.
The woman shut up and quietly sat down as though in a daze.
The therapist turned to the husband and said, "This is what your wife needs at least 3 times a week. Can you do this?
"Well, I can drop her off here on Mondays and Wednesdays, but on Fridays, I fish."

Neglecting to use a blinker while driving is a lot like i**... immigration.

You can't come over here if you can't do it legally.

Me: Dad, to be frank your years of neglect towards us has left us scarred for life and incapable of developing sincere and loving relationships

Dad: ...
Me: ...
Dad: HI FRANK!!!

Neglect joke, Me: Dad, to be frank your years of neglect towards us has left us scarred for life and incapable of