Native Jokes
174 native jokes and hilarious native puns to laugh out loud. Read ethnic jokes about native that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Looking for a laugh? Check out our collection of native jokes. From clever one-liners to funny stories, we've got something for everyone.
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Funniest Native Short Jokes
Short native jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The native humour may include short indigenous jokes also.
- How can you tell if a Redditor isn't a native English speaker? They'll inform you after three paragraphs of professional English.
- How do you know a redditor is not a native english speaker? They'll apologize for potential mistakes after 10 paragraphs of perfect english
- Did you know Vegetarian is a Native American word? It means Lousy Hunter
I am Native American and this joke has been told to me a couple of times. Thought I'd share. - Why do native Americans hate April? Because April showers bring May flowers and Mayflowers bring white people
- A Native American, Pirate, and Frenchman walk into a bar. The bartender walks over and says, "Gentlemen, hau, arrrrrrr, oui, today?"
- For all you non-native English speakers out there... "Read" is pronounced like "lead", while "read" is pronounced like "lead".
- I was viewing a house being sold by a native american i asked him if it came with running water,
He said 'no, get your own wife' - A dear friend of mine passed away this week. This was one of his jokes: What do you call half of a thousand native American insomniacs? The Indian nap-less 500.
- I once went to a Native American restaurant but was turned away. They told me it was reservation only.
- Why are Native Americans the most successfull strippers? Because when they dance, they make it rain.
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Native One Liners
Which native one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with native? I can suggest the ones about natural and original.
- Why do Native Americans hate snow? Because it's white and settles on their land.
- Why did the Native American sleep in the hotel lobby? He didn't have a reservation.
- What's that black stuff between an elephants toes? Slow Natives.
- Why don't native Americans like snow? Because it's white and all over their land.
- Why do Native Americans hate snow? It's white and on their land
- Why didn't the native Americans go out to dinner? They lost their reservations.
- Why do natives hate snow Because its white and it settles on their land.
- What does a Native American Biologist live in? ATP
- What is the brown sticky stuff between an elephant's toes? Slow natives.
- Never be racist towards Native Americans. They will Sioux you.
- How do you invite a Native Alaskan to your home? You Eskimover!
- Why was the Native American so tired? Because he'd been up all night building ATP.
- I couldn't get past first base with the native girl she had her reservations
- Why were Natives in America First? ...Because they had reservations.
- I was speaking to an African child in her native language. We just clicked.
Native American Jokes
Here is a list of funny native american jokes and even better native american puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why does the Native American always get a table at the nicest restaurants? He has a reservation.
- Give a man some corn, he eats for a day. Teach a man to grow corn, he kills you and steals your land!
- Why don't Native Americans like to do rain dances in April anymore? April showers bring Mayflowers.
- Why do native Americans hate the snow? ...because it is white and settles all over their land.
- Did you hear about that Native American who drank ten cups of tea one night? They found him dead the next day in his teepee
- Did you hear about the Native American who drank 1000 glasses of tea? He drown in his tea pee.
- Did you hear about the native American who tried to beat the world record for drinking the most tea? The next day he was found dead in his tea pee
- Hear about the Native American who died from drinking too much tea before bed? He drowned in his teepee.
- Advice from an old native American hunter: Never go hunting for buffalo with a dull spear, it is pointless.
- What is it called when you're having second thoughts about booking a room at a Native American casino? A reservation reservation reservation.
Native American Name Jokes
Here is a list of funny native american name jokes and even better native american name puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What's Donald Trump's Native American name? Talking Bull
- My wife's native american name is "3 horses" nag nag nag
- The native american boy asked his father why... His brother was named dancing cloud.
it because when he was conceived a cloud danced by, said the father. Do you understand now, broken rubber? - I met a Native American fan of Styx the other day. We talked for a bit, and he had to leave. I realized I didn't know his name. So I asked, and he told me he was called "Tecumsehlaway".
- What is Elizabeth Warren's Native American name? Lying Female Dog.
- What was the name of the Native American weather reporter? Apache Cloud.
- Have you heard the name of the native american that became a yoga instructor? Yogi bear
- I met a blind man who was half asian and half native american His name was Rong Time No See
- What is Michael Jackson's Native American name? Dances with Gloves.
- What was the name of the big gay Native American? Squatting Bear.
Native Indian Jokes
Here is a list of funny native indian jokes and even better native indian puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What do you call 500 Native Americans with no apples? The Indian Apple-less 500.
- What do you call a Native American with psoriasis? Apache Indian
- Vegetarian is an ancient Native Indian word meaning "bad hunter".
- Two Native Indians in a canoe and two Dutchman in a restaurant... Who tips first?
- Back in the days Columbus was trying to find India and now Native Americans are called Indians. Hundreds of years later: an American tries to fix his printer. This is Vikram, how may I help you?
- A Native dude asked me, "Do you know what my indian name is at the bar?" "Running Tab"
- A handless Native Indian waved at me today Didn't think that was possible, but he did some Hao
- What do you call gay s**... between the founder of Scientology and a Native American? The Indian in the Hubbard.
- What do you call several hundred Native Americans without n**...? The Indian Nippleless 500
- What do you call an elderly native American p**...? Its an old Indian trick,
Native Speakers Jokes
Here is a list of funny native speakers jokes and even better native speakers puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- How do you know someone with excellent English isn't a native speaker? They apologize for their bad English.
(Inspired by seeing an example on this sub.) - How do French women hold their liquor? By the ears.
Works best if you are a native English speaker. - A co worker accuses a wife of treating her husband "like a dog" The wife was a not a native English speaker. So she responded "That is not true! I love dogs!"
- What's easier to get, aids or lung cancer? Depends what you smoke.
(Not native speaker, sorry if it doesn't make sense) - As a non-native speaker, I have to say, sorry about the bad English That I'm about to get in replies from the native born speakers.
- Why did the blind, non-native English speaker fall in the well? He couldn't see that good.
- I can't use, contain, or denote expressions that are natural to a native English speaker. I'm completely idiomatic.
- I just met some horrible racist Mexicans Every time I try to talk to these native speakers, all they say to me is K, K, K?
- So my coworker is not a native english speaker... This morning he walked up to me and asked what is with all the news story on Donald Trump contracting aids from Russian agents...
- Hey Guys! First time posting here.
I'm not a native speaker so apologies if I made a mistake.
Also on phone, so pardon the format.
Second time reposting here.
Comedy Native Jokes to Make Your Friends Giggle
What funny jokes about native you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean primitive jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make native pranks.
Dirtiest, raunchiest, most racist joke you've got:
I'll start -
What do you do when you see a half dead native man crawling across your lawn?
Stop laughing and reload
Two Native Americans
Unwittingly walk into a gay bar and sit
down to order a pitcher of beer. As they're sitting there
s**... back on their ale, a gay guy walks up and says,
"How would you boys like a b**...?"
The one Indian stands up and decks the guy, knocking him
unconscious. He then sits back down and finishes his beer.
His buddy looks over and says, "Hey Joe, what did you do
that for?"
Joe replies, "Not sure but it was something about getting
a job!"
Outside is snowing hard.
My wife is looking thru the window with a nostalgic look.
If it is getting colder i might let her in.
PS: Sorry my native language is not english and i'm too old to learn it good.
A Mexican, a Black guy and a White guy are walking down the beach...
They find a bottle and the Mexican guy decides pick it up and rub it. A genie comes out of the bottle and speaks to them and grants them each one wish.
The Mexican guy goes first and says, "I wish that all my Mexican brethren and I could be transported back to our native homeland and we could all be happy there."
The genie grants his wish and p**..., the Mexican guy disappears.
Now it's the black guy's turn. He says, "I wish that all my African brothers and I could all go back to our motherland and be happy, prosperous and free."
The genie grants his wish and p**..., the Black guy disappears.
Now it's the white guy's turn.
The white guy pauses for a moment, scratches his head and says "Are you telling me that all the b**... and Mexicans are gone from America?
The genie nods his head and says yes.
The white guy makes up his mind and says, "Ok, well i'll have a Coke, thanks."
Searching for Sasquatch
Two men are on a hunt through the forest looking for Sasquatch.
After days and days of searching and not even finding a footprint, they happen to run into an old native man.
They ask the man "Have you by any chance seen a Sasquatch around here?"
Confused, he replies "Sasquatch?"
They answer him "Sasquatch..you know; big, hairy, smells bad.."
"Oh!" he replies. "You mean squawsnatch!"
The Longest Memory in the World
One day, a young man takes a trip out West and comes across a little Native American village. He decides, what the heck, he'll stop and look around. One of the Native women, seeing that he's not from around, tells the man he should visit the Chief, who she says has the longest and best memory in the world. So the man decides to go visit the Chief and asks: "So I hear you have the greatest memory in the world." The Chief answers "I do. I can remember every single detail of my entire life." The man figures he should test this, and asks the Chief "What did you have for breakfast on April the 27th, 1959?" After stopping to think for a second, the chief answers "two eggs." Satisfied, the man says goodbye to the Chief and eventually leaves the village.
Twenty years later, the man takes another trip out West and comes across the same village. He's amazed when he notices the Chief, still alive after all these years. The man, stops and says hello, so he raises his hand and says, "How" and the Chief replies "fried."
My grandpa's favorite joke
This works better in my native language, but I am going to do my best to try to translate it effectively.
At the end of a good day's work, an accountant goes home and announces proudly to his wife "Honey, I missed the bus today but I saved $2 by chasing after it all the way home! "
His wife fixes him with a look of pure contempt and says "You fool!! You could have saved $75 if you'd only chased after a cab."
What's the difference between your mom and an alpaca?
One's a hairy beast that spits and the other's native to South America.
A Native American boy goes up to his father and asks him how they are given their names...
"Father, how are our names chosen?"
"Well, when a baby is born, the father walks out of the tent, and the first thing he sees, he names his new son.
If he sees a bird flying, he names 'flying bird'. A deer jumping? 'Jumping Deer'.
So tell me, young Sheep-a-Shittin', why do you ask?"
Did you know that Native Americans were really good strippers?
Every time they danced, they made it rain.
How many native Americans does it take to change a light bulb?
About seven. One to change the bulb, six to sing the song.
My girlfriend's response to a lesbian joke that I told her
Years ago I told my girlfriend a joke, it went something like this:
Me: Did you hear about the French lesbian who went back home to France?
Her: (Shakes her head no)
Me: She missed her native tongue.
After I said the punchline, she didn't get it, just sat there and looked at me straight-faced, trying to make sense of it, finally she blurts out, "They have natives in France?"
I heard we like Native American jokes.
Two cowboys come upon an Indian lying on his stomach with
his ear to the ground.
One of the cowboys stops and says to the other, "You see
that Indian?"
"Yeah," says the other cowboy.
"Look," says the first one, "he's listening to the ground.
He can hear things for miles in any direction."
Just then the Indian looks up. "Covered wagon," he says,
"about two miles away. Have two horses, one brown, one white.
Man, woman, child, household effects in wagon."
"Incredible!" says the cowboy to his friend. "This Indian
knows how far away they are, how many horses, what color they
are, who is in the wagon, and what is in the wagon. Amazing!"
The Indian looks up and says, "Ran over me about a
half hour ago."
If you were to second guess your decision on booking a trip to a Native American community...
That would be a reservation reservation reservation!
The Native Americans used to trust the white man,
now they have their reservations.
Old Native American joke
A young Indian boy was curious about how he got his name. He asked the chief, "Chief, how do we get our names?"
The Chief answers him, "We give names by what is outside of the teepee during ones birth.
"When your mom was born, it was a beautiful April day, so we named her BlueSky.
"After your dad's birth we were greeted by a majestic deer, so we named him WhiteTail."
The chief looked at the boy a little puzzled,
"Why do you ask BearFuckingBear?"
The other day my European friend ask me about our views on l**... in this country.
Apparently, "usually in HD" was not the answer she was looking for
P.S sorry english not my native language
Two drunk idiots are sitting on top of a building...
Staring at the moon, one of 'em says, "Give me your flashlight, I'll turn it on, aim it at the moon and then you go climb up to the moon using the beam."
"No! You idiot! What if you turn it off when I'm midway!"
(English, not my native language, apologies.)
A man meets a Native American with flawless memory...
When he meets this Native American Chief he notices he is older than most.
He asks the Chief many questions, and the Chief replies flawlessly to each one.
Then he thinks of a random date and asks the Chief, "What did you eat on October 18, 1987?" The Chief replies "Eggs".
He leaves the Chief and goes home. A year later he meets the Chief again. Feeling respectful he approaches the Chief, and says "How" and the Chief says, "Scrambled!"
The fly and me
I'm translating this joke from my native language so I'm hoping its just as funny in English.
The other night I saw a mosquito in my room. I kept trying to catch it till I caught it in a corner, ready to end its life, when all of a sudden it turned around and said "Wait! Surely you won't kill your own family!", I stopped in my tracks and stared at the mosquito thinking what it meant. Then I realised the mosquito wasn't lying... My blood was coursing through its veins
Why do Native Americans hate it when it rains in April?
Because it brings Mayflowers.
What do you call an editor that sleeps with a native American?
Editor in chief.
What did the Native American pornstar call himself?
Spread Eagle
Did you hear what happened to the Native American who drank too much tea...?
They found him dead the next day in his tepee
Two Native Americans walk into a restaurant...
The concierge asks, "Do you have reservations?" One of the guys replies, "Yes; mine is in Oklahoma and his is in Arizona."
If you were to second guess your decision to stay at a hotel on a native american reserve...
....that would be a reservation reservation reservation
-credit to Brian Regan
A boy goes to the circus
and one of the sideshows is a tent that says "Man Who Remembers Everything." Intrigued, the boy goes inside and sees an old Native American man sitting on the ground. He approaches the man and asks, "If you remember everything, what did you have for breakfast exactly three weeks ago?"
Without hesitation, the man responds, "Eggs." The boy is sufficiently impressed and leaves to enjoy the rest of the circus.
Many years later, the boy has grown up, gotten married, and had children. One day he takes his family to the circus and is shocked to see the Man Who Remembers Everything is still there. He brings his family into the tent, and there is the same old man sitting on the ground.
Excited to see the old man again, he walks up and greets him, "How!"
The old man looks into his eyes and replies, "Scrambled."
US has serious problem with i**... immigrants.
If you don't believe me ask any Native American.
What did the Native American do after culinary school?
He became a Souix chef.
A car broke down on a Native Reservation...
...so the driver got out to see what was going on. He lifted the hood, looked in, and noticed there was something wrong with the motor piston. Without any tools or cell service, he sighed, shut the hood and leaned on his car and waited for a passerby. Finally, a truck came around the bend so he waved it down and the truck pulled over. Inside was a few Native Americans, and asked, "what's wrong?"
"Piston broke", he replied.
"So are we. Get in."
(Dirty) The cavalry were riding through the plains with their Native American guide.
The Indian gets off his horse and puts his ear to the ground. He looks up at the captain and says " Buffalo come " . The captain is astounded and asks " Can you really hear buffalo from here? The Indian replies "NO, side of face all sticky!"
They say there are about 12 million i**... immigrants in this country...
...but if you ask a native American, that number is more like 300 million.
What happened to the Native American who drank too much tea?
He died in his teepee
A man is in an airplane from Miami to Paris
And a stunning gorgeous woman seats by his side. He's the eager to start a conversation.
"So, what are you doing in Paris?"
"I'm a scientist, I research s**..."
The man is now tempted:
"What have you discovered about s**... in your research?"
"I came to find that Native Americans have the longest p**... and Spanish can last the longest in bed. By the way, I'm Carol, what's your name?"
"I'm Sitting Bull Hernandez, nice to meet you"
Why do Native Americans dance at s**... clubs?
They want to make it rain.
Thanksgiving.
The day in 1621 when Native Americans shared a meal with undocumented immigrants who never left.
A soldier was given the job of hunting for buffalo...
To help him, he hired a Native American scout.
The two of them set off on their journey to find buffalo.
After riding awhile, the scout gets off his horse, puts his ear to the ground and says "Hmmm, buffalo come."
The soldier scans the area with his binoculars, but sees nothing.
He is confused and says to the scout, "I do not see anything, how do you know buffalo come?"
The scout replies, "Ear sticky".
Who is second in command in the kitchen at a Native American owned restaurant?
The Sioux chef
There are more Jews than Native Americans...
I guess genocide is just one more thing Americans are better at than Germans
My half Native American friend Les tried to teach me to rain dance, but we could only ever muster a light mist...
I guess I'm just going to have to make dew with Les.
A Native American child asks his father how they choose children's names.
Father - "After you are born, we open the tepee and the first thing we see is what we name you. Like your eldest brother, Soaring Eagle, your sister, Falling Leaves, and your little brother, Grizzly Cub. Why do you ask Two Dogs h**...?"
There's an old Native American man that sits in a teepee along the road I take to work.
Every morning for a while now I stop in and ask him what the weather will be that day. Rain, snow, sun, clouds. He's always right.
Well yesterday I stopped in just like normal and asked what the weather was going to be like.
"Got no clue", he said.
I was shocked. "What's different about today that you don't know?"
He just shook his head sadly. "Radio broke."
One day in class...
The teacher called 3 native boys and asked which tribe they were from. The first boy said "I am Souix". The second boy said " I am Cherokee". The third boy said "I am Fukowi". Confused, the teacher asked "How do you know?" The boy responded "I was walking with my father on a mountain top, when he stopped, looked around and said 'We're the Fukawi'".
A tourist group
A tourist group is lead over a mountain path.
One of the tourists gets extremely nervous and says to their native guide:
"You really could have put a handrail on the side"
The guide answers:
"There was a handrail, but it became too expensive, the tourists always took it down with them when they fell"
A buffalo hunter and a Native American guide
One day when they were hunting the guide stopped, put his ear to the ground and listened, then said "Buffalo come"
The hunter asked "How can you tell"
The guide replied "Ear sticky"
An attractive woman was reading The History of p**... on the bus the other day...
... I struck up a conversations opening with "That seems interesting"
She responds: "It really is! Did you know that Native Americans have the longest p**... in the world? And Poles the girthiest!"
She extends her hand, I grab it and say... "Tonto Polanski, pleasure to meet you"
My Biology Teacher Asked What ATP is...
I replied, "where Native Americans live."
What did the Native American say when Donald Trump promised to give their land back?
"I have my reservations"
A Native American walks into an Old West saloon followed shortly by a bear
The patrons freeze in fear, and the saloonkeeper points to the Native American man and whispers "There's a bear right behind you!"
The Native American man holds up a calm hand and says, "I can explain. Bear with me."
Why are native Americans such good strippers?
Every time they dance they make it rain.
A pilot bailed out of his crashing plane and landed on an uncharted island.
He soon found himself surrounded by natives with spears. A big native adorned with decorations points at the pilot.
I'm s**..., says the pilot.
God opens up the clouds and says to the pilot, No, you're not s**.... Grab the closest spear and throw it through the leader's heart.
The pilot does this.
NOW you're s**..., says God.
Native American run deep in my bloodline. That's why I can't grow f**... hair.
I have Apache beard.
All the good restaurants are racist.
Apparently they only serve native americans, because every time I ask for a table they tell me I need to have a reservation.
What do you call a native american pirate?
An eyepache
A Native American boy goes to his chief with a question
Chief Running Bear, where do our names come from?
The Chief replied, You are named after the first thing we see in nature after you are born. Soon after I was born, my chief saw a bear running through the trees, so I am named Running Bear. Why do you ask, Two Dogs h**...?
In primitive society, when native tribes beat the ground with clubs and yelled, it was called witchcraft
Today, in civilized society, it is called golf.
A Native American tribe are looking for buffalo to hunt.
As they travel along, one member puts his ear to the ground for a moment and then says: buffalo come.
The chief asks How can you tell?
The man replies Sticky ear.
Anyone heard of the fugawee native american tribe?
Famous for being terrible navigators, would climb the highest mountains where ever they would travel, look around and yell "where the fugawee!!"
