Native American Jokes
148 native american jokes and hilarious native american puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about native american that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Native American Short Jokes
Short native american jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The native american humour may include short native indian jokes also.
- A native American, Pirate, and Frenchman walk into a bar. The bartender walks over and says, "Gentlemen, hau, arrrrrrr, oui, today?"
- I was viewing a house being sold by a native american i asked him if it came with running water,
He said 'no, get your own wife' - A dear friend of mine passed away this week. This was one of his jokes: What do you call half of a thousand native American insomniacs? The Indian nap-less 500.
- I once went to a Native American restaurant but was turned away. They told me it was reservation only.
- Why does the Native American always get a table at the nicest restaurants? He has a reservation.
- Why don't Native Americans like to do rain dances in April anymore? April showers bring Mayflowers.
- Did you hear about that Native American who drank ten cups of tea one night? They found him dead the next day in his teepee
- Advice from an old native American hunter: Never go hunting for buffalo with a dull spear, it is pointless.
- My half Native American friend Les tried to teach me to rain dance, but we could only ever muster a light mist... I guess I'm just going to have to make dew with Les.
- What did the Native American say when Donald Trump promised to give their land back? "I have my reservations"
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Native American One Liners
Which native american one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with native american? I can suggest the ones about american indian and indian tribe.
- Why do Native Americans hate snow? Because it's white and settles on their land.
- Why did the Native American sleep in the hotel lobby? He didn't have a reservation.
- Why didn't the native Americans go out to dinner? They lost their reservations.
- What does a Native American Biologist live in? ATP
- Why was the Native American so tired? Because he'd been up all night building ATP.
- What do you call an editor that sleeps with a native American? Editor in chief.
- Most Native Americans don't like me. Or at least they have reservations.
- What did the Native American do after culinary school? He became a Souix chef.
- What do you call a native american pirate? An eyepache
- My Biology Teacher Asked What ATP is... I replied, "where Native Americans live."
- What did the Native American pornstar call himself? Spread Eagle
- What do you call 500 Native Americans with no apples? The Indian Apple-less 500.
- What's Donald Trump's Native American name? Talking Bull
- What did the Native American say when he killed his son on a hunting trip? Bison
- What do Native Americans call vegetarians? Poor hunters
Native American Name Jokes
Here is a list of funny native american name jokes and even better native american name puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- My wife's native american name is "3 horses" nag nag nag
- The native american boy asked his father why... His brother was named dancing cloud.
it because when he was conceived a cloud danced by, said the father. Do you understand now, broken rubber? - I met a Native American fan of Styx the other day. We talked for a bit, and he had to leave. I realized I didn't know his name. So I asked, and he told me he was called "Tecumsehlaway".
- What was the name of the Native American weather reporter? Apache Cloud.
- Have you heard the name of the native american that became a yoga instructor? Yogi bear
- I met a blind man who was half asian and half native american His name was Rong Time No See
- What is Michael Jackson's Native American name? Dances with Gloves.
- A Native American with the name "Chomsky" would have a hard time. "Are you Mark?"
"No am Chomsky."
Native American Indian Jokes
Here is a list of funny native american indian jokes and even better native american indian puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What do you call a Native American with psoriasis? Apache Indian
- Back in the days Columbus was trying to find India and now Native Americans are called Indians. Hundreds of years later: an American tries to fix his printer. This is Vikram, how may I help you?
Native American Tribe Jokes
Here is a list of funny native american tribe jokes and even better native american tribe puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Ted lived a great distance from the Native Americans. He was known among the tribe as Far Ted.
- There is a cross dressing native american tribe in my town... They call the tribe Mashantucket
Native American Thanksgiving Jokes
Here is a list of funny native american thanksgiving jokes and even better native american thanksgiving puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Thanksgiving. The day in 1621 when Native Americans shared a meal with undocumented immigrants who never left.
- How do you say Thanksgiving in Native American? Last Supper
Gather Around for Heartwarming Native American Jokes and Uplifting Humor
What funny jokes about native american you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean indigenous jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make native american pranks.
A Native American walks into an Old West saloon followed shortly by a bear
The patrons freeze in fear, and the saloonkeeper points to the Native American man and whispers "There's a bear right behind you!"
The Native American man holds up a calm hand and says, "I can explain. Bear with me."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why do native Americans hate April?
Because April showers bring May flowers and Mayflowers bring white people
A tourist decides to visit a Native American Chief who is famous for his perfect memory.
"Okay, Chief..." says the tourist,
"Let's test that memory of yours. What did you eat for breakfast on May 9th, 1972?"
The Chief thinks for a moment, and responds "Eggs."
The tourist replies, "Wow, that's incredible! You really do have a perfect memory." and leaves.
Ten years later the tourist finds himself in the Chief's neck of the woods and decides to pay him a visit.
He enters the Chief's home and respectfully greets him, saying "Hau, Chief."
The Chief promptly replies, "Scrambled."
There's an old Native American man that sits in a teepee along the road I take to work.
Every morning for a while now I stop in and ask him what the weather will be that day. Rain, snow, sun, clouds. He's always right.
Well yesterday I stopped in just like normal and asked what the weather was going to be like.
"Got no clue", he said.
I was shocked. "What's different about today that you don't know?"
He just shook his head sadly. "Radio broke."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Two Native Americans
Unwittingly walk into a gay bar and sit
down to order a pitcher of beer. As they're sitting there
s**... back on their ale, a gay guy walks up and says,
"How would you boys like a b**...?"
The one Indian stands up and decks the guy, knocking him
unconscious. He then sits back down and finishes his beer.
His buddy looks over and says, "Hey Joe, what did you do
that for?"
Joe replies, "Not sure but it was something about getting
a job!"
A soldier was given the job of hunting for buffalo...
To help him, he hired a Native American scout.
The two of them set off on their journey to find buffalo.
After riding awhile, the scout gets off his horse, puts his ear to the ground and says "Hmmm, buffalo come."
The soldier scans the area with his binoculars, but sees nothing.
He is confused and says to the scout, "I do not see anything, how do you know buffalo come?"
The scout replies, "Ear sticky".
A man meets a Native American with flawless memory...
When he meets this Native American Chief he notices he is older than most.
He asks the Chief many questions, and the Chief replies flawlessly to each one.
Then he thinks of a random date and asks the Chief, "What did you eat on October 18, 1987?" The Chief replies "Eggs".
He leaves the Chief and goes home. A year later he meets the Chief again. Feeling respectful he approaches the Chief, and says "How" and the Chief says, "Scrambled!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A big city doctor visits an Native American tribe full of men and he asks "How do you guys relieve your s**... tension?
"Simple, just come down to the river tomorrow and we'll show you." The next day the doctor shows up and sees a group of men near a donkey. One man says "Since you're our guest you get to go first."
The doctor not knowing what to do stands cluelessly until a tribesman explains to him: " Use the donkey".
The doctor: " what?"
"Yes use it, mount it"
The doctor not wanting to go against custom starts to kiss, then proceeds to have s**... with the donkey. Then a man in the group asks "Are you almost done Doc? We need the donkey to cross the river in order to get to the tribe of women."
The Longest Memory in the World
One day, a young man takes a trip out West and comes across a little Native American village. He decides, what the heck, he'll stop and look around. One of the Native women, seeing that he's not from around, tells the man he should visit the Chief, who she says has the longest and best memory in the world. So the man decides to go visit the Chief and asks: "So I hear you have the greatest memory in the world." The Chief answers "I do. I can remember every single detail of my entire life." The man figures he should test this, and asks the Chief "What did you have for breakfast on April the 27th, 1959?" After stopping to think for a second, the chief answers "two eggs." Satisfied, the man says goodbye to the Chief and eventually leaves the village.
Twenty years later, the man takes another trip out West and comes across the same village. He's amazed when he notices the Chief, still alive after all these years. The man, stops and says hello, so he raises his hand and says, "How" and the Chief replies "fried."
A car broke down on a Native Reservation...
...so the driver got out to see what was going on. He lifted the hood, looked in, and noticed there was something wrong with the motor piston. Without any tools or cell service, he sighed, shut the hood and leaned on his car and waited for a passerby. Finally, a truck came around the bend so he waved it down and the truck pulled over. Inside was a few Native Americans, and asked, "what's wrong?"
"Piston broke", he replied.
"So are we. Get in."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why do native Americans hate the snow?
...because it is white and settles all over their land.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I heard we like Native American jokes.
Two cowboys come upon an Indian lying on his stomach with
his ear to the ground.
One of the cowboys stops and says to the other, "You see
that Indian?"
"Yeah," says the other cowboy.
"Look," says the first one, "he's listening to the ground.
He can hear things for miles in any direction."
Just then the Indian looks up. "Covered wagon," he says,
"about two miles away. Have two horses, one brown, one white.
Man, woman, child, household effects in wagon."
"Incredible!" says the cowboy to his friend. "This Indian
knows how far away they are, how many horses, what color they
are, who is in the wagon, and what is in the wagon. Amazing!"
The Indian looks up and says, "Ran over me about a
half hour ago."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An attractive woman was reading The History of p**... on the bus the other day...
... I struck up a conversations opening with "That seems interesting"
She responds: "It really is! Did you know that Native Americans have the longest p**... in the world? And Poles the girthiest!"
She extends her hand, I grab it and say... "Tonto Polanski, pleasure to meet you"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A man is in an airplane from Miami to Paris
And a stunning gorgeous woman seats by his side. He's the eager to start a conversation.
"So, what are you doing in Paris?"
"I'm a scientist, I research s**..."
The man is now tempted:
"What have you discovered about s**... in your research?"
"I came to find that Native Americans have the longest p**... and Spanish can last the longest in bed. By the way, I'm Carol, what's your name?"
"I'm Sitting Bull Hernandez, nice to meet you"
A boy goes to the circus
and one of the sideshows is a tent that says "Man Who Remembers Everything." Intrigued, the boy goes inside and sees an old Native American man sitting on the ground. He approaches the man and asks, "If you remember everything, what did you have for breakfast exactly three weeks ago?"
Without hesitation, the man responds, "Eggs." The boy is sufficiently impressed and leaves to enjoy the rest of the circus.
Many years later, the boy has grown up, gotten married, and had children. One day he takes his family to the circus and is shocked to see the Man Who Remembers Everything is still there. He brings his family into the tent, and there is the same old man sitting on the ground.
Excited to see the old man again, he walks up and greets him, "How!"
The old man looks into his eyes and replies, "Scrambled."
A Native American boy goes up to his father and asks him how they are given their names...
"Father, how are our names chosen?"
"Well, when a baby is born, the father walks out of the tent, and the first thing he sees, he names his new son.
If he sees a bird flying, he names 'flying bird'. A deer jumping? 'Jumping Deer'.
So tell me, young Sheep-a-Shittin', why do you ask?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Never be racist towards Native Americans.
They will Sioux you.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
They say there are about 12 million i**... immigrants in this country...
...but if you ask a native American, that number is more like 300 million.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
US has serious problem with i**... immigrants.
If you don't believe me ask any Native American.
Old Native American joke
A young Indian boy was curious about how he got his name. He asked the chief, "Chief, how do we get our names?"
The Chief answers him, "We give names by what is outside of the teepee during ones birth.
"When your mom was born, it was a beautiful April day, so we named her BlueSky.
"After your dad's birth we were greeted by a majestic deer, so we named him WhiteTail."
The chief looked at the boy a little puzzled,
"Why do you ask BearFuckingBear?"
If you were to second guess your decision to stay at a hotel on a native american reserve...
....that would be a reservation reservation reservation
-credit to Brian Regan
My Native American girlfriend was nervous the first time she invited me back to her place
She had her reservations
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A group of Native Americans are sitting around a campfire
A young brave asks the others, "When will I be given a name?"
"When you distinguish yourself in the tribe," answers Thundering Buffalo.
"Then the elders will recognize you with a name," says Rides By Moonlight.
"It is the proudest moment of a young brave's life," says Silent Wolf.
"Eh, it's overrated," says s**... In Breechcloth.
Two astronauts went to the moon
When they crawled out of their spaceship, it was a sight to behold. In the distance, there was a teepee and a Native American sitting near a fire. They approached the native and one of them said, Hello! We're from planet Earth! The native, with a scared look, says, Oh god, not again.
Two Native Americans walk into a restaurant...
The concierge asks, "Do you have reservations?" One of the guys replies, "Yes; mine is in Oklahoma and his is in Arizona."
Did you know that Native Americans were really good strippers?
Every time they danced, they made it rain.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The Native Americans used to trust the white man,
now they have their reservations.
A tourist was admiring the necklace worn by a local Native American.
"What is it made of?" she asked."Alligator's teeth," the man replied."I suppose," she said patronizingly, "that they mean as much to you as pearls do to us.""Oh no," he objected. "Anybody can open an oyster."
TIL: A thousand years ago, a group of Native Americans tried to cross into Russia from Alaska but failed.
They couldn't get their Bering Strait.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call gay s**... between the founder of Scientology and a Native American?
The Indian in the Hubbard.
Did you hear what happened to the Native American who drank too much tea...?
They found him dead the next day in his tepee
A Native American goes to court
and says: - "I want to change my name"
the clerk asks him: "What is your name?"
\-"The big round rock that rolled down the hill and fell into the creek"
\-"And what will your new name be?"
\-"Splash"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why are native Americans such good strippers?
Every time they dance they make it rain.
Who is second in command in the kitchen at a Native American owned restaurant?
The Sioux chef
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Native American run deep in my bloodline. That's why I can't grow f**... hair.
I have Apache beard.
Tracker
So the cowboys hire a native american tracker. The tracker would often dismount his horse, look closely at the ground, sniff, put his ears on the ground, etc.
So today they are riding a trail. Tracker asks for a halt, gets off the horse and holds his ears to the ground. Gets up says "Buffalo come!"
Cowboy says "Wow! You can feel the vibrations of the herd moving?"
Tracker : "No. Face sticky!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Anyone heard of the fugawee native american tribe?
Famous for being terrible navigators, would climb the highest mountains where ever they would travel, look around and yell "where the fugawee!!"
How do you get into a Native American restaurant?
You make a reservation
I wanted to see where the Native Americans lived....
but I have my reservations...
I asked my Native American wife if she'd be interested in owning some land.
She told me she had reservations.
I plagiarized a book about native Americans...
I eventually got siouxed.
My dad used to tell the ultimate dad joke passed on by his Native American father from Arizona.
"You boys know how all these cacti got their name?"
*sigh* "No dad how did they decide on a name?"
"Well, when the first Native American tried the water from them, he exclaimed 'Yucca!'"
(Yucca is the name of an abundant species of cacti found in Arizona)
(I cringed when I heard this and I loved my grandfather very much so I understand any negative reaction)
What do you call a Native American cook?
A Sioux chef
I work in a popular hotel...
I see people come in to stay from all over the world, yet for some reason I've never seen a Native American here. I guess they just don't like to make reservations.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A jewish man walks down the street
He is approached by a native american man who aggresively states
"Your people stole my land!" The jew, knowing that this is incorrect, defends himself.
"i'm not white, i'm jewish, you see," he began, "My family fled here from germany in 1943", but was cut short by the native american.
"My house was taken by the bank"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call several hundred Native Americans without n**...?
The Indian Nippleless 500
Why did the Native American undergo cellular respiration?
To make A TP
Why did the Native American quit his desk job at the Marriot?
He didn't like dealing with reservations.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a short Native American programmer?
A Little Endian
-I'll get the door.
If someone...
If someone is having second thoughts about booking a trip in native American territory, you could say they are having a reservation reservation reservation.
...
Good thing self posts don't grant negative karma >.>
A school teacher invited a Native American to give a presentation to his students about their culture
After discussing history, traditions and lifestyle, the conversation turned to language.
"One of the interesting things about our language," he said, "is that there are no cuss words."
"But then what do you say if you are hammering a nail and accidentally hit your finger?" asked a student.
"In that case," he replied, "we use your language."
Amazeballs is millennial for "cool",
But it's also Native American for "hush puppies".
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a promiscuous Native American?
Nava-h**...
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Native American scolded me for celebrating Thanksgiving, a celebration of s**...
So I said, "you're right, it's awful what they've done to the turkeys all these years."
