National Guard Jokes
6 national guard jokes and hilarious national guard puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about national guard that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Fun-Filled National Guard Jokes to Boost Your Mood
What is a good national guard joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
A Russian Tourist Travels Abroad.
Border guard: Nationality?
tourist: Russian.
Border guard: Occupation?
Tourist: No, no, just visiting this time.
I was with my wife in Russia when it starts to drizzle
So I say to my wife "It's raining" she quickly responds (looking to start a fight) "Actually, I think it's snowing".
This goes back and forth for a few minutes when I notice my buddy Officer Rudolf of the communist national guard. I go over to him and ask, "Officer Rudolf, is it raining or snowing?"
He glances over and replies, "raining, ofcourse".
I turn back to my wife and triumphantly announce, "See, Rudolf the red knows rain dear!"
A soldier in my National Guard platoon...
...... became concerned when the Army insisted that he sign up for direct deposit.
"It's not going to work for me," he said, panicked.
"Why not?" I asked.
"Because I use my Guard pay for spending money."
"So?"
"For the past ten years, I've been telling my wife that I serve for free!"
In 1957, the National Guard was sent in to integrate the Little Rock Nine.
The result was, of course, the Little Rock 9x+c
The people of Baltimore played GTA yesterday...
Tonight they will see the National Guard play Call of Duty.
a soldier finds himself outside after night fall
A soldier finds himself outside his base of operations in a foreign country after night fall. He managed to find himself back at the main gate of entry but was unable to produce any physical evidence that he was in fact born and raised in the USA. The guard at the gate was not allowed to let anyone in who wasn't a citizen of the United States. The solider suggested that the guard ask him a few questions to prove in nationally. The guard then replied, "OK, sing the national anthem." The solider then sang the national anthem just as he has heard it at countless sporting events and county fairs. When he finished the guard said, "OK, now sing the second verse." The solider yelled, "I don't know the second verse!" to which the guard said,"you're obviously American, c'mon in."
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