The Best 48 Nake Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Nake jokes. There are some nake runs jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these nake office puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Nake Jokes and Puns

A naked man runs into a tailor's shop.

The tailor says "you can't be in here with no clothes on!"

The man says "aw come on dude, cut me some slacks?"

A naked guy walks into a psychiatrist's office...

"You gotta help me, doc," he tells the psychiatrist, "I think I'm going crazy!"

The psychiatrist looks him over and replies. "Well, I can clearly see your nuts."

A naked lady goes to a bar, asks for a drink

A naked lady goes to a bar, asks for a drink.
Bartender stares at her. Lady said, "Never seen a nude woman?"
Bartender replied, "Nah, just wondering, how are you going to pay?"

Nake joke, A naked lady goes to a bar, asks for a drink

I saw a naked black man in a tree today

He was well hung

A naked man...

... was running outside and causing some pandemonium.

The police tried everything to get this man to stop: pepper spray, tazers, rubber bullets...nothing seemed to work.

With a big grin, one officer turned to the Chief and said, "I've got an idea...we spray him with Windex!"

The Chief, confused asked how that would help...

The new guy says, "Windex prevents streaking..."

A naked man covered head to toe in saran wrap goes to see a psychologist.

A naked man covered head to toe in saran wrap goes to see a psychologist. He says, "Doc, something's wrong. I think I'm going crazy!" The psychologist replies, "Well I can clearly see your nuts."

Naked man doing jumping jacks...

db qp db qp db qp db qp

Nake joke, Naked man doing jumping jacks...

Naked New Jersey

My girlfriend comes up to me naked and says kiss me where it smells.

So I drove her to New Jersery

A naked lady ran into Akpos' taxi

A naked lady ran into Akpos' taxi. She told the driver where she was going.
Akpos didn't start the car but he was just staring at the woman over and over again.
The lady looked at him and said, what's your problem, man? Haven't you seen a naked lady before? Akpos replied, I am not looking at your nakedness, I was just wondering where you kept the money you are going to pay me.

What are 3 naked woman on a crate of beer?

In the way!

I saw myself naked in the mirror.

And now my hand isn't in the mood.

You can explore nake nakedness reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean nake dude dad jokes. There are also nake puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

A naked Jew with an erection running at full speed hits a wall

He breaks his nose.

A naked jew with an erection ran into a wall

He broke his nose

When I get naked in the bathroom..

The shower usually gets turned on.

A naked lady walks into a bar and says why all the stares?

We're on the 2nd floor and we don't have a elevator.

Naked sunbathing....

A man was sunbathing naked at the beach. For the sake of civility, and to keep it from getting sunburned, he had a hat over his privates. A woman walks past and says, snickering, "If you were a gentleman you'd lift your hat."

He raised an eyebrow and replied, "If you weren't so ugly, it would lift itself."

Nake joke, Naked sunbathing....

A naked man broke into a church this morning...

After a 30 minute chase, the police finally caught him by the organ.

I have seen my first naked lady

Sorry, I meant...

I have seen my First Lady naked.

A naked man is walking down the street with a woman on his back...

A guy on the other side of the street yells at him "Hey! What are you doing!?"

The naked man replies, "Don't get all upset. I'm headed to a costume party!"

"As what?" asks the guy.

"As a tortoise! Can't you tell?"

"Well, what's the woman doing on your back?"

"Oh that's just Michelle."

I'm almost always naked when ordering food

It really weirds out the drive-thru attendant

Four naked guys are sitting in a hot tub.

All of a sudden, a condom floats to the surface. After a few seconds of stares and silence, one of the guys asks, "Alright, who farted?"

What are three naked girls on a six-pack beer?

In the way...

Naked man walks into a psychiatrists office wrapped in Saran Wrap.

The doctor says, "Sir, I can clearly see yer nuts."

Why couldn't the naked man's gun fire?

It wasn't fully cocked.

A naked lady ran into a taxi.

She told the driver where she was going. The man didn't start the car but he was just staring at the girl over & over again.The lady saw him and said:"What's ur problem man? Haven't u seen a naked lady before?"The man replied: "l am not looking at ur nakedness, I was just wondering where you have kept the money you are going to pay me!

A naked woman enters a taxi

The taxi driver stares at the woman until she asks
-"What are you staring at?" And the driver responds
-"Just wondering where you're gonna get the money from"

A naked woman sits in a taxi

The taxi driver looks at the woman from head to toe repeatedly. Offended, the woman says "Haven't you ever seen a woman naked before?" The driver looks at her in the eyes and says, "No, I was just wondering where you kept the money to pay me."

A naked women took a taxi

All way long, the driver starring at her in the mirror. She said "what? You never seen a naked woman?" He said "no. I'm just wondering where you will take the money out from"

A naked woman robbed a bank..

No one could remember her face.

Haven't u seen a naked woman before?

Fully Nude British Lady gets into taxi. Chinese Driver looks at her top to bottom repeatedly..

British Lady asks,
"Haven't u seen a naked woman before?"

Chinese Driver: I no look you naked. I plenty frightened. I look look. Where you keep money pay me?

I got some naked lady stamps and I'm confused...

I don't know if I should lick the back of them or the front of them.

When I get naked

The only thing that gets turned on is the shower.

Naked old men in locker rooms...

I was going to make a joke about this, but it's such low hanging fruit.

Every naked person I see turns me on...

Said the shower head.

What did the naked Hispanic boy say when someone retrieved his swimsuit after his embarrassing slip-and-slide run?


A naked man ran past two old ladies

one had a stroke, the other missed

If a naked guy jumps on your back...

Would you beat him off?..

How old is too old to be naked around your kids?

Because forty-five just doesn't *feel* old.

Why should you never get naked while a Pokemon is in the room with you

They might Peek-at-chu

What do naked muslims say when they need to work?

I need a hijob.

What's the most naked food?


A naked girl walks into a bar.

The barman couldn't stop looking at her. She asked:

\- What's the matter? Haven't you ever seen a naked woman in your life?

\- I have, but I just want to know where you'll take your money from when it's time to pay the drink!

Naked painting

The head nun tells the two new nuns that they have to paint their room without getting any paint on their clothes.

So the one nun says to the other, "Hey, let's take all our clothes off, fold them up, and lock the door."

So they do this, and begin painting their room. Soon they hear a knock at the door. They ask, "Who is it?"

"Blind man!"

The nuns look at each other, then one nun says, "He's blind, he can't see. What could it hurt."

They let him in.

The blind man walks in and says, "Hey, nice tits. Where do you want me to hang the blinds?"

A naked man arrives at a costume party with a girl on his back.

"I'm a turtle", he says.

"Oh... who's on your back?"

"That's Michelle", he replies.

A naked man walked past an Elephant

The elephant exclaimed Jesus, how do you breath with that thing?

She's Naked.

A taxi driver spot a girl hailing for a cab outside a nightclub. She was completely naked. He stopped and she went into the taxi.

Throughout the drive, the girl noticed that the driver kept looking at her with the front mirror. "Hey man, never see a hot naked girl before huh? Why don't you keep your eyes on the road", she said.

Then, the driver stopped driving before turning around and stare at her intensely.

"Nah, I'm just wondering where you keep the money for my cab, Bitch!"

This naked man walks into a psychiatrist's office ...

He is naked except that he is completely wrapped in head to toe with cellophane. He says, "First impression, doc, am I crazy?"

The doctor says, "Well, normally I don't like making rash diagnoses but in this case it is sooo obvious. Everyone in my entire office can see your nuts."

A naked man walks into a psychiatrists office.

The psychiatrist says to the naked man, "I can clearly see your nuts".

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the nake expose jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working nake shop piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes