Musical Instrument Jokes
85 musical instrument jokes and hilarious musical instrument puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about musical instrument that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Musical Instrument Short Jokes
Short musical instrument jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The musical instrument humour may include short music instruments jokes also.
- Accordion to a recent survey, 7 out of 10 people don't notice when a word in a sentence is replaced by a musical instrument.
- Accordion to scientific studies, 90% .. of people do not realise I replaced the beginning of this joke with a musical instrument.
- After hearing me sing, my music teacher said that I should be tenor. Ten or twelve feet away from all musical instruments at all times.
- What did the guitar at the music store say to the customer browsing through their selection of stringed instruments? "Pick Me!! Pick Me!!!!!"
- My ex is a musician. Her musical instrument and I had a lot in common. We both got played, constantly.
- Nowadays there's too many musical instruments It seems today, that all you see is violins in movies and sax on TV
- Survey says Accordian to a recent survey, replacing words with the names of musical instruments often goes undetected.
- A man walks into his orchestra rehearsal... carrying some corn on the cob as his instrument.
The conductor asks him Will you need any sheet music?
The man replies, Nah, I'll play it by ear. - Tchaikovsky, you cannot use instruments of war as musical instruments Tchaikovsky: I cannon I will
- Sean Connery has been scouring Israel for ancient musical instruments. When asked about his progress, he replied, "I've only found one shofar."
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Musical Instrument One Liners
Which musical instrument one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with musical instrument? I can suggest the ones about string instruments and musical.
- What's a pothead's favorite musical instrument? bag pipes
- I would never hit someone with a musical instrument... I don't like to resort to violins
- What's an emo's favorite musical instrument? The forearm violin.
- What do you call ten whales playing musical instruments? An orca-stra 😊
- What do you call a group of killer whales carrying musical instruments? An orca-stra.
- What musical instrument do you get if you fill a 55-gallon drum with fish? A bass drum.
- Which musical instrument does Vladimir Putin know how to play best? The TRUMPet!
- I like musical instruments that you blow into. They're pretty... *Breathtaking*
- What do you call a musical instrument made of gelatin? A jello!
- What does a sword and a musical instrument have in common? They both know how to b sharp.
- What instruments should be featured in a rogue AI's music band? Just Harmonika
- Did you hear the government took all the musical instruments They were band
- What is a fisherman's favorite musical instrument? The bass guitar.
- What's a sheep's favourite musical instrument ? A Ewekulele
- What's the most flavorful musical instrument in Japan? The frute.
Loads of Fun with Charming Humor Musical Instrument Jokes
What funny jokes about musical instrument you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean guitar jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make musical instrument pranks.
What musical instrument is found in the bathroom? A tuba toothpaste.
Why did the boy studying music school want to become a pilot?
He wanted to play with instruments
What's a fat kids favourite instrument?
The dinner bell
What was the potato farmer's favourite musical instrument?
The tuba
What's the most indecisive musical instrument?
A pi-yeah-no!
What do you call a group of people who smash the windows to a music store and stealing instruments?
Luters
What musical instrument should you never, ever trust?
The Lyre.
What musical instrument do people with stds play?
The herpsichord.
You hear in his will Prince left a bunch of large musical instruments to churches?
Turns out he was *a big o**... donor.*
What do you call a big music festival with no instruments?
Acoachella
What do you call someone stealing musical instruments?
A Luter.
What is the most racist (and ignorant) musical instrument?
The Trumpet.
I asked my priest which musical instruments he plays.
"Mostly just piano," he replied, "but when I'm at work I sometimes dabble with a little o**...."
What's the Doom marine's favorite musical instrument?...
Violins
Trump was asked what his favorite musical instrument is, and said "Trumpet."
He was asked what his favorite topic is, and said "Tropics."
He was asked what his favorite multiplier is, said "Triple."
He was asked what he favorite reason is, said "Treaso-...shut up."
What do you call a man with no arms and no legs that plays 15 musical instruments?
Stump the Band
My friend asked me why did I choose Harmonica as my musical instrument
I said "I s**... half the time so I decided why not"
I can play every single musical instrument.
Just not well enough
What is the best musical instrument for a senior citizen to learn?
The HAARP
What did Quentin Tarantino say when he finally remembered his favorite musical instrument?
Oh, my theremin!
Why is it important to listen to music without vocals?
It's instrumental.
Farts are like musical instruments...
They ship duty free.
If a tire was a musical instrument...
would it immediately go flat when you go sharp?
What's Hillary Clinton's favourite musical instrument?
Harm Monica
What's the most dangerous musical instrument?
A violint
On the last day of music class, students were told not to bring their instruments.
The choir kids had a hard time
I found one of those s**... buzzfeed tests, you know the ones like find out what musical instrument you are! I took it, it told me I was a piano.
What musical instrument does our current president know how to play well?
The Trumpet!
I passed by a music shop the other day
All the instruments were painted with cool pictures and patterns. However, it didn't allow children due to graphic violins and sax.
Bill Clinton is known to enjoy this music instrument
Harmonica Lewinsky
I've never played a musical instrument.
Only the didgeridoo.
What happened to Hawaii when it lost all of its musical instruments?
It became an a cappellago.
"Rincewind, all the shops have been smashed open, there was a whole bunch of people across the street helping themselves to musical instruments, can you believe that?"
"Yeah, Luters I expect." --Terry Pratchet, The Light Fantastic
What do you call it when four moderators play musical instruments together?
[Banned]
Which is the President's favorite musical instrument?
The Trumpet.
What do you call an instigated collection of instruments?
An inclination of 1080p music
What's the most commonly stolen musical instrument?
A piano. People are always leaving the keys in them.
Noted archeologist Fred Flintstein made an amazing discovery today in Sweden
He found remains of some primitive musical instrument and a small deposit of fossilized e**.... when asked about what they signified,
Fred Flintstein replied: "A dab o' ABBA doo."
3 Instruments are Catching Up
School is back in for the fall and 3 instruments are sharing their musical journey through the Summer.
The saxophone says, "I got to go to New Orleans and play with a real jazz band."
The guitar says, "I went to Mexico and played music so beautiful that the audience threw roses on the stage!"
At this moment, the Saxophone realizes that the flute has been quiet. "Hey Flute, how was your summer?"
The flute says, "I don't wanna talk about it."
The guitar says, "Come on, I thought you were going to band camp?"
"I DONT WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT"
I saw a new music shop in town that only services instruments made between the years 1600 and 1750.
"If It Ain't Baroque, Don't Fix It"
My 7 year old just came up with these Avatar: The Last Airbender jokes. We were quite surprised.
What kind of music does Toph like?
- Rock-and-Roll
What kind of instrument does Aang play?
- Air guitar
I know it's not much, but I got a kick out of his reasoning and decided to share.
A bunch of hooligans are smashing up my shop and stealing musical instruments
d**... luters!
A musician walks in to a music store.
"I'm looking for an instrument that goes *ding*." he says.
"*Ding*?" asks the confused shopkeeper.
The musician replies "You'll do fine."
"All the shops have been smashed open, there was a whole bunch of people across the street helping themselves to musical instruments, can you believe that?"
"Yeah," said Rincewind. "Luters, I expect."
* Terry Pratchett, *The Light Fantastic*
Sylvia was wheeled into the operating room.
The surgeon told the nurse, "Please prepare the instruments."
Sylvia glared at him and said, "Here I am at death's door and you want to play music?!?"