Munich Jokes
17 munich jokes and hilarious munich puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about munich that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Munich Short Jokes
Short munich jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The munich humour may include short hamburg jokes also.
- Police broke up a fight between an arsenal and a Bayern Munich fan. They decided not to press charges because it was 2 of one and half a score of the other.
- I tired to make a joke about Manchester United's Munich Air Disaster. But it didn't land well.
- A German is trying to to make his way to Paris At the border, the French customs agent asks him
Name?
Hans Mueller.
Place of residence?
Munich.
Occupation?
No, just vacation this time. - It was nice celebrating Oktoberfest in September in Munich See you all in November for Christmas!
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Munich One Liners
Which munich one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with munich? I can suggest the ones about surrender and allies.
- What do you call a castrated German? A Munich
- The Munich agreement was a peace of sheet.
- Anyone watch Real Madrid vs. Bayern Munich? 4-2nate ending for Madrid.
- The Munich Agreement was a mistake. Just Czech out how much damage it caused.
- A sign in Munich reads ... "Heisenberg might have slept here."
- Munich Once again, a visit to McDonald's proves to be bad for your health.
Gather Around for Fun Munich Jokes and Laughter with Friends
What funny jokes about munich you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make munich pranks.
The German Lifeguard
A group of friends were on a boat in Munich when the hull was breached.
They quickly called for the German Life Guard yelling "Help we're sinking!"
The Life Guard asked "Ja, vat are you sinking about?"
At Munich Airport
A young man approaches an Olympic athlete carrying a long pole and asks are you a pole vaulter?
The man clearly annoyed responds no, I'm German, and how did you know my name is Walter?!
After my flight arrival in Munich . . .
After my flight arrival in Munich I was going through customs and was spoken to in German by the customs agent.
I obviously looked perplexed, and so the agent asked me in English if I at least knew a little German.
I said "Sure, his name is Gunther and he's about four foot, nine inches tall."
Two Jews leave Russia
One goes to Israel and the other goes to Germany. When they get together a year later, one of them says,
"Abram, I'm doing great. I opened my own business in Haifa. The weather is nice, and everyone speaks my language!"
"You know, Khaim," says Abram. "I'm not doing too bad myself. I live in Munich and work in a crematorium. You won't believe it friend, but I'm actually burning Germans!"
Two Jews emigrate from Russia.
One goes to Israel and the other goes to Germany. One year passes and they get together at a restaurant to catch up.
"Moshe, I'm very lucky" says his friend, "I live in Haifa now where I own a supermarket. The weather is wonderful, and everyone is so kind. I truly have it made."
"Izya, I am lucky as well. I live in Munich and work at a local crematorium, and you won't believe it, BUT I'M BURNING GERMANS!"
