Mumbling Jokes
27 mumbling jokes and hilarious mumbling puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about mumbling that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Mumbling Short Jokes
Short mumbling jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The mumbling humour may include short mumbles jokes also.
- So Tekashi69 could face life in prison Which is nice because we might finally get to see a mumble rapper completing a sentence
- Wife was in ICU Doctor: She is in a coma.
Husband: Please save her. She's just 30.
*Just then, ECG starts beeping. Fingers move. Her lips mumbled...
And she spoke:
I'm 29 - I'm 29.. *Wife was in ICU*
Doc: seems like she is in a coma.
Husband: Please save her, she is just 30.
*Suddenly the ECG starts beeping, her hand moved, her lip mumbled*
And she spoke: I'm 29 - What do mumble rappers from the East coast rap about? I don't know...Their verses aren't Pacific.
- As I handed him my passport, the immigration officer stared at me with cold, dead eyes and mumbled, "I might not always agree with you, but..." "I can see where you are coming from."
- Why did the mumble rapper broke out of the prison? Because he couldn't complete his sentence
- What's the difference between a mumble rapper and a convict... One of them can finish a sentence.
- I walked in on my son making out with his girlfriend. "Oh, woah, what's this?" I asked. He's been avoiding me ever since... ... and keeps mumbling something about me being a "furry"
- Long ago, my mentor told me to look into self improvement. He used to mumble a bit, though. Now I don't have the discipline to actually build one, but I know everything about constructing shelves.
- As I stared at my grandpa on his deathbed not knowing what to say, he turned to me and mumbled "take my picture... it'll last longer."
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Mumbling One Liners
Which mumbling one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with mumbling? I can suggest the ones about muttering and stammered.
- If 6ix9ine serves his 47 years... he'll be the first mumble rapper to finish a sentence
- How do you pump up a room full of shy introverts? "LETS GET READY TO MUMBLE!!!"
- Mumble rappers are dying off Lil' by Lil'
- What did the insolent sheep mumble to the shepherd? You herd me.
- Dad's joke: What kind of bee can never be understood? A mumble-bee
- What do you call an insect that talks under its breath? A mumble bee
- Mumble rappers and Japanese Anime are the same both require subtitles.
- What do you call a Soviet mumble rapper? Stalean
- What's a mumble rappers favorite food? Skrrt Steak!
- What do you call a Chinese mumble rapper? Yung Savage
- Why do mumble rappers have neck tattoos? So the paramedics know it was fentanyl.
- What's the mumble-rapper's favorite meal? Skrrt steak
- How to get a mumble rapper to complete a sentence Send him to prison
- 6ix9ine in prison: first mumble rapper to make a full sentence
- 6ix9ine is going to jail Wow, a mumble rapper that can finally finish a sentence
Quirky and Hilarious Mumbling Jokes to Let the Chuckles Begin.
What funny jokes about mumbling you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean stumbling jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make mumbling pranks.
An old man is selling watermelons...
His pricelist reads: 1 for $3, 3 for $10
A young man stops by and asks to buy one watermelon.
"That'd be 3 dollars", says the old man.
The young man then buys another one, and another one, paying $3 for each.
As the young man is walking away, he turns around, grins, and says, "Hey old man, do you realize I just bought three watermelons for only $9? Maybe business is not your thing."
The old man smiles and mumbles to himself, "People are funny. Every time they buy three watermelons instead of one, yet they keep trying to teach me how to do business..."
I came home really drunk last night and my wife wasn't happy at all. How much have you had to drink? she asked sternly, staring at me. Nothing I slurred. Look at me! she shouted. It's either me or the pub, which one is it?
I paused for a second while I thought and mumbled, It's you. I can tell by the voice.
The first rule about Thesaurus club is
that you do not talk, speak, prattle, whisper, chatter, mumble, rant, articulate, babble, describe, divulge, drone, confer, deliberate, squeal, or converse about Thesaurus Club.
Drunk in confession booth.
A drunk staggers into a church, enters a confessional booth, sits down, but says nothing. The priest coughs a few times to get his attention, but the drunk continues to just sit there. Finally,the priest pounds three times on the wall.
The drunk mumbles, "Ain't no use knockin, there's no paper on this side either!"
The first rule of Thesaurus Club is
that you do not talk, whisper, chatter, mumble, rant, articulate, prattle, babble, describe, divulge, drone, confer, deliberate, squeal, converse, discourse, orate or speak about Thesaurus Club.
Harry Potter woke up in a hospital.
A little confused he asked "where am I?"
Doctor: "why you were in a coma and just awoke in this fine hospital"
"Why am I in a muggle Hospital?" he mumbled to himself
slightly hearing him the doctor spoke " Son, Take it easy, you ran face first into a wall and have been in a coma for 8 years"
Soviet Breadline
At one of USSR's breadlines during the Perestroika, a man in the crowd is mumbling to himself. "No bread, no milk, no meat, what a shame".
Two policemen walking the beat hearing his mumbling walk up to him, and say:
"Comrade, if you said that 40 years ago you'd be shot, so just shut up and stand in line like everybody else"
As the policemen leave, the man turns back to the crowd and says:
"Not only we don't have bread or milk, but I was just told we ran out of bullets too."
So people are loading into an airplane
And the pilot of this airplane is blind. At the end of the take off s**... is a huge lake. All the people on the plane are relaxing reading books and talking to each other as the airplane starts to roll down the s**.... A few people see that they are heading towards a lake but they assume the pilot knows what he's doing. The airplane is going dangerously close to the lake and the plane is still not taking off, at this point people are starting panic. The plane is still not taking off and it's way too close to the lake. At this point everyone on the plane is screaming and yelling because the plane is about to plunge into the lake at the end of the s**.... The plane is about 10 feet away from the lake then it lifts off the ground and takes off. The passengers calm down slowly and return to reading and talking . In the front of the plane the pilot laughs to himself and mumbles "one of these days the passengers won't scream and we'll all die."
