Mule Jokes
53 mule jokes and hilarious mule puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about mule that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Enjoy a good laugh with these hilarious mule jokes! Learn more about different types of mules, from the horse and donkey mix to the drug mule and mule deer. Humor made from transporting crops and wearing a saddle!
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Funniest Mule Short Jokes
Short mule jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The mule humour may include short donkey jokes also.
- A mule walks into a bar in Moscow The bartender looks at him and says Hey, we have a drink named after you!
Really? replies the mule There's a drink named Boris? - Riding a horse can be difficult. You could always choose to ride a mule instead... but that would be half-assed.
- A timid friend of mine was arrested at the border for being a drug mule. I didn't know he had it in him.
- A mule walks in to a bar... And sits down. The bartender sees him and says "Hey! We have a drink named after you!!"
The mule says "You have a drink named Larry?" - What is the difference between the most famous character in Spanish literature and a gay mule? One is Don Quixote. The other is Donkey Joto.
- An odd look... Came to the counter of the pharmacy with a box if condoms... Person ringing me up gave me a quick odd look.... I caught it and said "oh, it's not what you think... I'm a drug mule"
- What do you get when you cross a Sith Lord, and a Donkey? Darth Mule!
A joke, from third grade me...
Happy Star Wars day! - Mules Mules are held donkey and half horse. So does this mean that they do everything half-assed?
- How do you acquire a small version of Thor's hammer? Breed a horse with a donkey and you'll have a little mule near.
- President Trumps presidency is like a mule with a spinning wheel. Nobody knows how he got and danged if he knows how to use it.
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Mule One Liners
Which mule one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with mule? I can suggest the ones about mullet and maul.
- I have no respect for mules. Everything they do is half-assed.
- I ordered a horse from a rancher, but only got a mule. Guess he just half-assed it.
- Why did the mule fail his math test? He was half-assing it
- My boss asked for a horse, and I brought him a mule... He said my work was half-assed.
- I've never had a high opinion of mules. Theyre just half-assed horses
- My mule is pretty lazy... ... Always doing half-assed work.
- Mules The thing I hate about mules is that they're so half-assed.
- Mules... are SO half-assed.
- How do mob boss mules open doors? With Don-keys.
- What is Mexico's National Animal? The drug mule.
- Mules are just a half-assed attempt to make a stronger horse.
- What do you get for breeding a donkey and a mule A monkey
- Why was the horse always mad at the mule? It kept half-assing everything.
- Why don't mules do a good job? They're always half-assing it.
- The mule was the original hybrid vehicle.
Drug Mule Jokes
Here is a list of funny drug mule jokes and even better drug mule puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- How do you find a drug dealer donkey? Just follow his coke mules.
- Did you hear about the furry who got detained at the border? The guards thought he was a drug mule.
- Police today said they found a stash of c**... in a horse box They're on the look out for drugs mules
Loads of Fun with Charming Humor Mule Jokes
What funny jokes about mule you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean mussel jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make mule pranks.
I'm from the southern US, is it OK to poke fun at myself?
Why don't schools in the south teach Driver's Ed and s**... Ed on same day?
Too hard on the mule.
Latvian Dreamin'
Little boy go to father. Is midnight. Say boy, "Father! I dream I is Mr. Potato! Have big eyes and smile! Even having shoes! I wish I Mr. Potato for all ever!"
Man woke in midnight all sudden. Rubs eyes. Remembers boy dead by mule, and is no potato. Only cold. Is all dream. Lay back on dirt. No smiles. No shoes.
Treating her like a dog
A woman walks into a bar and orders a Moscow mule. "Congratulate me, I just got divorced," the woman says. "He'll never treat me like a dog again." "What, did he hit or beat you," the bartender asks. "No," she replies. "He expected me to be faithful."
You can't trust a mule with an important task.
They'll just half-a**... it.
I was thinking about getting a mule
But I've heard they do a half a**... job
A mule walks into a bar, and the bartender asks, "Why the long face?"
The mule replies, "Well, my mother was a horse, of course, of course. And no one can talk to a horse, of course. Which eventually led to divorce, of course. Of which there was no recourse, of course.
So without my father but with my mute mother, it took quite a long time for me to discover...
...I can't have kids"
Piece of string walks into a bar.
He sits at the bar and asks the bartender for a Moscow Mule. The bartender looks him over and says I'm sorry, but we don't serve string here . The piece of string leaves with a bit of hurt feelings.
The next night he decides to go in disguise and try again. He ruffles up his hair and adds a few curves and loops to make himself seem thicker, before putting on a bigger jacket. When he makes it back to the bar, the bartender spots him and immediately asks Hey, aren't you that piece of string from last night? .
No he replies, I'm a frayed knot .
I was pulled over by the police on my mule.
I got a speeding ticket for hauling a**....
My wife and I were talking about our physical relationship.
"I wish you were more of a lion," she said.
"A lion? Why?" I asked.
She said, "They are masculine and aggressive."
"I wish you were more of a mule," I said.
"A mule? Why?" she asked.
I said, "They can't reproduce."
Why does the farmer hate his mule?
Because when it works, it is always half-a**....
I like my women the way I like my coffee
t**... in a burlap sack and slung over the back of Juan Valdez's mule.
What would a lazy literalist name a mule?
Half-a**...
Why can you never use a mule to do the hard work?
They always half-a**... it.
What do you call a Caucasian mule?
You guessed it, a h**... donkey...
Whoever said I got caught having s**... with a horse, you're a liar!
It was a mule.
