Muhammad Jokes

103 muhammad jokes and hilarious muhammad puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about muhammad that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Muhammad jokes have been around for centuries. From Sunni-Shiite rivalries to references to Mustafa, these funny jokes about the Prophet Muhammad Ali are sure to bring a smile to your face. Discover some of the best Muhammad jokes from around the world, highlighting the life and legacy of Omar.

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Funniest Muhammad Short Jokes

Short muhammad jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The muhammad humour may include short prophet muhammad jokes also.

  1. Why did the Red Cross not allow Jesus and Muhammad to volunteer? It's a non-prophet organization.
  2. We need to start giving hurricanes arab names Nobody is going to leave for Irma but if Muhammad was coming the whole country would evacuate
  3. A Muslim man sees the face of Muhammad in a tub of margarine one day His neighbor from Nepal looks over and says "I can't believe it's not Buddha"
  4. My favorite drawings at the Muhammad cartoon festival in Texas were the two chalk outlines out front. Credit Evan Sayet.
  5. Muhammad Ali, Mike Tyson, and floyd mayweather are waiting patiently for a glass of sangria. If that's not a good punchline, I don't know what is.
  6. I've started a business crafting small figurines of Muhammad. It's making little prophets.
  7. Did you hear Muhammad Ali burnt his hand in a few fights? That's what happens when you punch George Foreman in the grill.
  8. Jesus and Muhammad were having an intense debate about which of their religions is stronger. My faith moved mountains, exclaimed Jesus.
    Yes, agreed Muhammad, but mine moved skyscrapers.
  9. My friends kept saying they saw Muhammad walking around town. They never found him. I guess he was just a turban legend.
  10. I started a figurine company that specializes in miniature Muhammad statues We make a small prophet.

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Muhammad One Liners

Which muhammad one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with muhammad? I can suggest the ones about muhammad ali and prophet.

    MUHAMMAD ALI D.V.D'S......
    (both boxed.)
  2. What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? Muhammad, statistically
  3. Why did Muhammad hire Moses to help with his start-up? He wanted to double his prophets.
  4. What is the name of Muhammad Ali's sheep? Ali BaaBaa.
  5. What do you call a Muslim person standing between two buildings? Muhammad Alley
  6. What do you call a surrealist painter that converts to Islam? Muhammad Dali
  7. What do you call Muhammad Ali after he eats lots of beans? Gaseous Clay
  8. What do you call a Muslim who's a smart investor? Profit Muhammad
  9. So Muhammad Ali is dead... Is it too soon for a punchline?
  10. 1. Muhammad 2\. (Peace be upon him)
    3\. Prophet????
  11. What did Muhammad Ali name his son? Alli'son.
  12. I've always wanted to shake Muhammad Ali's hand Unfortunately, Parkinson's beat me to it.
  13. Today on greatest hits Mike Tyson and Muhammad Ali.
  14. Who would win in a fight between Muhammad Ali and Stephen Hawking? Parkinson's
  15. What do they call Muhammad Ali on bean night? Gaseous Clay

Muhammad Ali Jokes

Here is a list of funny muhammad ali jokes and even better muhammad ali puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Muhammad Ali in 1974: Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee Floyd Mayweather in 2015: Run like a chicken, hug like a bear
  • Everyone thinks Muhammad Ali was the best boxer in history, but Jim Jones had a way higher number of KO's... 900 with just one punch.
  • Today I posted a video of Muhammad Ali's "Rumble in the Jungle" fight in reverse. It's the first in a series of unboxing videos.
  • Muhammad Ali & Joe Frazier go to a Dry Cleaner. Owner says, "Can I help you?"
    They say, "How much to wash an old pair of boxers?"
  • Muhammad Ali walks into a bar So Muhammad Ali walks into a bar and orders a drink.
    He gives the bartender ceramic money.
    The Bartender says "I can't accept this your Cash Is Clay"
  • What did they call Muhammad Ali when he got the farts? Gassius Clay
  • What did they call Muhammad Ali after he had baked beans? Gaseous Clay
  • The worst thing about Muhammad Ali sending a "Tweet" to Mayweather . . . Ali couldn't type it and Mayweather couldn't read it.
  • What do you call Muhammad Ali with indigestion? Gaseous Clay
  • Two goats walk into a mosque.... And the priest welcomed Kareem Abdul-Jabbar and Muhammad Ali to his sermon.

Prophet Muhammad Jokes

Here is a list of funny prophet muhammad jokes and even better prophet muhammad puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I just started volunteering at this place called Muhammad's Bakery. It's a naan prophet organization.
  • A priest, a rabbi, and the Holy Prophet Muhammad walk into a bar. The Prophet Muhammad beheads the priest and the rabbi, and burns down the bar.
  • I recently bought a teddy bear named Muhammad... for $10. And a week later, sold it for $20. The question is, did I make a Prophet?
  • What did the Prophet Muhammad call his baby sheep? Is-lamb.
  • Why did Muhammad cross the road? You should not question the prophet's motives infidel!
  • What does an atheist call the meeting of Muhammad, Moses, and Joseph Smith? A non-prophet organization
  • How many verses did the Prophet Muhammad write? Allah-t.
    Thanks for listening.
  • Why did the Muslim CEO dislike the cartoon of Muhammad? Because it wasn't prophet maximizing.
  • What do you call a 58 year old man that has s**... with a 9 year old girl? The Prophet Muhammad.
  • How did Prophet Muhammad split the moon? By revealing his b**...-crack.
Muhammad joke, How did Prophet Muhammad split the moon?

Muhammad joke, How did Prophet Muhammad split the moon?

Laughable Muhammad Jokes for Instant Grins & Giggles

What funny jokes about muhammad you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean infidel jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make muhammad pranks.

In light of the Muhammad Ali gif gaining popularity...

Why doesn't Muhammad Ali understand jokes?
[Because he always misses the punchline.](/spoiler)

Muhammad, Jesus and Buddha walks into a bar...

The bartender asks each of them what they want.
Muhammad orders a glass of cranberry juice.
Jesus orders a glass of water, and promptly turns it into wine.
Then the bartender asks Buddha, "what do you want?"
Buddha replies, "Make me one with everything."

Why was Muhammad a successful merchant?

Because he was god's profit.

I was at a u**... when I realized standing to my left was Muhammad Ali and to my right was Michael J. Fox...

bad day to wear sandals.

Muhammad walks up to the Buddha and says "Guess what a mosque and 9 year old have in common."

I've been in both.

Why couldn't Muhammad pick his wife up from childcare?

Because Muslim girls can't go to school

Jesus, Moses, and Muhammad are fishing on a boat

As Jesus winds down the fishing lesson, he notes the time. He bids them farewell, and walks across the lake home.
After a while, Moses decided he wasn't very good at fishing, so he parted the lake and went home.
Being the last one left, Muhammed ██████████ █████ ████████████████ ██████████ ███████████████ ███████

How does one stab Muhammad Ali?

Hand him a knife...

What would a Jidahist agree with an Islamophobe about?

That Muhammad should not be on the $20 dollar bill.

What do you call Muhammad Ali when he just can't stop f**...?

Gassius Clay

What is Muhammad's favorite restaurant?

The Allahu Snackbar

What did Muhammad Ali tell ISIS?

IsIs? Pretty soon y'all gonna be WasWas !


Three first-graders are flunking their class. The teacher calls them in and tells them: "I will ask you one question each, if you can answer it, you pass."
"Jim, how do you spell 'Cow'?"
"Jack, how do you spell 'Car'?"
"Muhammad, how do you spell 'Racial discrimination'?"

What do you call a boxer with allergies?

Muhammad Achoo

What do you call a 53 year old who has s**... with a 9 year old?

1.6 billion people call him Muhammad.

What did the clerk say to young Muhammad Ali when he tried to purchase an elaborate Christmas present?

You're cashless, Clay.

Why is Aisha a world renowned p**... tester?

Because muhammad taught her from a very young age.

I figured out why so many Muslims are called Muhammad.

So they don't have to have their picture in the yearbook.

What was Muhammad Ali's favourite day of the year?

Boxing day

"They're stealing our jobs!"

Yes Gary, with your high school diploma.
Muhammad the neurologist is stealing your job.

How does Muhammad order his pie?


Israelis and Palestinians are fighting a battle.

From the israeli side, a machine gun fires, bang bang bang bang bang bang bang.
From the Palestinian side, a rifle goes bang bang
This goes on for a bit until suddenly, the Palestinian side goes quiet.
A head pokes out of the Israeli foxhole. Hey Muhammad! You run out of ammo?
Well come on over, i'll sell you some!

What brand of medicine sponsored a boxer?

Muhammad Aleve

An Afghan villager is walking down a road with his wife ahead of him a few steps.

He meets his fellow villager going the opposite way.
He says, "Ahmed, Prophet Muhammad would never let his wife walk ahead of him."
The first villager replies, "Well, at the time of the Prophet there were no minefields."

(True joke) In 1960, after winning his olympic gold medal, Muhammad Ali went to eat at a fancy downtown resteraunt.

When the waiter came over Ali asked for a cheeseburger.
Shocked to see a black man sitting in the resteraunt, the waiter announced "We don't serve n**...".
Ali: "Well I don't eat them either, just give me my d**... cheeseburger".

Muhammad joke, (True joke) In 1960, after winning his olympic gold medal, Muhammad Ali went to eat at a fancy downt

jokes about muhammad