Mow Jokes
51 mow jokes and hilarious mow puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about mow that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Mow Short Jokes
Short mow jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The mow humour may include short hedge jokes also.
- Saw a black guy walking the streets carrying a tv and I thought "is that one mine"?... ... then I remembered it couldn't be mine because mine was mowing the lawn at the moment.
- There's that moment when you put your steak on the grill and your mouth waters all over from that amazing smell... Do you vegans feel the same when you mow the grass?
- I woke up hung-over to the sound of my neighbour mowing his lawn. He'll have to mow around me. I'm not moving.
- I was griling a steak earlier and the smell of the juices made my mouth water.... Got me thinking....Do vegetarians have the same effect when mowing a lawn ?
- I had 180 people under me at my first job and I was only 14 years old. I mowed the town cemetery.
- I drool as I watch the gyro meat getting sliced off the stick for my wrap... ... then I wonder - is that how vegans feel when they watch someone mowing the lawn?
- I mowed the lawn with my shirt off, and now my back is stiff. My wife told next time to mow with my pants off.
- I recently realised I'm gender fluid… When it's time to cook dinner I identify as a man.
And when it's time to mow the lawn I identify as a woman. - What did SpaceX's grass smell like after the drones finished mowing it? It had an E-Lawn Musk
- Billy Idol's wife gets very upset when he's behind on the yardwork. Why just yesterday, in the midnight hour, she yelled: mow! mow! mow!
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Mow One Liners
Which mow one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with mow? I can suggest the ones about mower and impeccable.
- At my new job I have 500 people under me. I mow grass at a cemetery.
- Today I had to fire the guy I hired to mow my lawn He just wasn't cutting it
- Chuck Norris doesn't mow his lawn He sits on his porch and dares it to grow.
- Did you hear what happened to the really offensive joke about tall grass? [re mowed]
- To save on mowing, get an emo lawn, It cuts itself.
- A landscaper's favourite musical genre? Mow-town.
- Americans pay for gym memberships and for people to mow their lawns.
- Have you found Jesus? Cause I haven't seen him and my lawn really needs a mow.
- What did the computer do with his overgrown gardens...? Mowed 'em.
- I feel bad for the people that mow the edges of golf courses. They have a rough job.
- When will the procrastinator cut the grass? In a mow
- How many dads does it take to mow a lawn? 1, he did it before you asked him
- What do you call a lawn mower that lets you mow grass at an angle? A protractor.
- What happened to the ice cream cone that got ran over by a lawn mower? it was a la mowed
- Why don't they mow the lawn at Hot Topic? The grass cuts itself
Share Hilarious Mow Jokes and Enjoy Unforgettable Laughter
What funny jokes about mow you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean gardener jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make mow pranks.
A Sunday school teacher posed a question to her class, "If I were to sell my house, car, donate my possessions to charity, and give all my money to the church, would I get into heaven?"
The children unanimously replied, "No."
The teacher then asked, "If I were to keep the church clean, mow the lawn, and keep everything neat and tidy, would I get into heaven?"
Once again, the answer was a resounding "No."
Apparently perplexed, the teacher asked, "Well, then how can I get into heaven?"
A quick-witted five-year-old boy piped up and replied, "You have to be dead!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How many Mexicans does it take to mow the lawn?
Only Juan.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Mowing the grass.
One Saturday afternoon, I was sitting on my porch, drinking a beer and watching my wife mow the lawn. The lady from across the street was so outraged that she came over and shouted at me, "You should be hung."
I calmly replied, "I am. That's why she cuts the grass."
During the summer, a kid started a yard work business....
...After several weeks his mother noticed he was becoming more and more depressed. She asked her son, "why are you so blue lately, your business is doing great"?
The son replied, "Mow money mow problems".
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Woke up at 6 o' clock this morning ...
...with a b**... hangover listening to my neighbour mowing his lawn , was going to get up and throttle the sod , but then thought "To Heck with it , he can mow around me."
You know that mouth-watering sensation you get when you're grilling a steak on the BBQ?
I wonder if vegans get that when they mow the lawn.
I'm having some Italian grass put in my yard.
Then I can mow Milan. Hopefully I can cut a pisa grass while I Rome around.
This just popped in my head...
What's a mexican's favorite Disney movie?
Mow lawn.
Sorry.
My wife wants pay equality....
I told her I would do 1 better and gave her $1 to mow the grass.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My homie only lets dudes use his lawnmower.
No h**... mow.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a lawncare company owned by a promiscuous lesbian?
h**... Mow
Did you hear about the anemic guy that cut all the grass on earth in a square pattern?
He mow globe in cells
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My 2.5 year old's joke
**Grandma to kids:** Are you Jack? Are you Harry?
**Kids**: nooooo (laughter)
**Grandma to 2.5 year old grandson**: Are you Mo?
**Grandson**: I mow the lawn!
I need 6 to 8 vegans...
...to mow my lawn. Plenty of food here, just bring your own drinks please.
Mowing the Lawn
I was planning to mow the lawn the other day but instead decided to but a keg of beer. I poured it on the lawn and after 30 minutes it was half cut!
Your grandpa used to mow the lawn all the time, but now he's...
Son: dad please don't
Dad: lawn gone
What did Phil Collins say when his gardener asked how he'd like the lawn cut?
"I don't care; any mow."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How does Santa mow his lawn?
With a h**... h**... h**....
You are what you eat.
Hi son, dad called. He wanted you to mow the lawn.
The guy who mows our grass has the BEST prices
He will mow a lot for $30.
why even mow the lawn? unless you rip out the roots its just going to grow back..
ha
A shepherd has 20 white sheep and 3 black ones.
A guy nearby comes to talk to him.
"What do your sheep do all day?"
"Well, usually the white ones search for good grass to eat."
"And the black ones?"
"They usually also spend time searching for good grass."
"How many times a year do you mow them?"
"I usually mow the white ones 3 to 4 times a year"
"What about the black ones?"
"About 3 or 4 times every year."
The guy frowns. "Why do you distinguish between the two kinds if the answer is the same?"
"Well, the white ones are mine."
"And the others?"
"Also mine!"
