Moustache Jokes
45 moustache jokes and hilarious moustache puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about moustache that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Are you looking for a laugh? Check out this hilarious selection of moustache jokes that will have you rolling in laughter! From handlebar moustache gags to jokes about razor and eyebrows, these jokes will have you in stitches. Don't forget the wig jokes either! Get your fill of humor and have a good time!
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Funniest Moustache Short Jokes
Short moustache jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The moustache humour may include short mustache jokes also.
- I've been cheating on my girlfriend with her twin, but it's OK because I can tell them apart. Brian has a moustache.
- Compliment somebody on their moustache and all of a sudden she is not your friend anymore.
- So my friend is dating twins... ...And I said, "Isn't it hard to tell them appart?" He replied with, "Well not really, the brother has a moustache."
- Why do women like men with moustaches? Because they immediately see something about you they can change.
- I genuinely complemented on a coworkers moustache, Now she's making a big deal with HR about it.
- Little Johnny yells upstairs: "Dad, there's a salesman here with a moustache." "Tell him I've got one."
- My mom just told me this one, not sure how I feel about that... What's the difference between a gay moustache and a straight moustache?
The smell. - I grew a moustache during the pandemic, but no one has seen it under my mask It's my secret 'stache
- Nice mustache! ...oh. I hate when you offer someone a sincere compliment on their moustache and suddenly she's not your friend anymore..
- My wife said to me "why don't you grow a moustache?" So i did... Because we like to do things together....
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Moustache One Liners
Which moustache one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with moustache? I can suggest the ones about mustache you and shave mustache.
- So I complimented my friend's majestic moustache. No idea why she had to slap me though.
- Never compliment your friend's moustache No matter how good it looks on her face
- This morning I couldn't find my moustache... it was under my nose the whole time.
- What's the one compliment women hate to receive? "Hey, nice moustache!"
- why do greek men grow moustaches? So they can look like their mammas.
- I moustache you a question But I'm shaving it for later.
- What do you call a priest in a fake moustache? A blessing in disguise.
- What do you call a rabbit's moustache? Harelip.
- I complimented my friend on their moustache Now I don't know why she isn't talking to me
- I had a moustache once. It was delicious.
- What do you call a stash of French cows? A moustache
- What was Hitlers nickname for his moustache? Meinstauschwitz.
- What moustache? A chicken.
What?
A chicken must hatch. - Why don't bike shave? They're proud of their handlebar moustaches.
- You know what's sharper than this joke? The razor your mother needs for her moustache.
Heartwarming Moustache Jokes that Make You Laugh
What funny jokes about moustache you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean beard jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make moustache pranks.
My buddy has big news...
He comes to me one day and says "Dude, you'll never believe it, I'm b**... twins."
"That's awesome" I reply "but how can you tell them apart?"
"Easy" he says "Marys got long blonde hair and Steves got a moustache."
s**... with Twins!
Two friends, Bob and Joe, were playing golf. Bob remarked, "Ya know Joe, last week I had s**... with twins!" "Really?" Joe replied. "How could you tell them apart?" "Well," Bob answered, "the brother had a moustache."
Had s**... with twins last night, my friend asked how i could tell them apart, "easy" i said..
.."the brother had a moustache"
n Eskimo was out for a drive
An eskimo is out for a drive one day when his car breaks down and is forced to call a mechanic. Finally the mechanic arrives and he sets to work, looking under the bonnet until he locates the problem. He looks up at the Eskimo and says, "You've blown a seal, mate" to which the Eskimo hastily replies, "No I haven't! That's just frost on my moustache."
I was just boasting at work about how I'm currently sleeping with a set of twins...
All the lads were very impressed but one asked;
"How do you tell them apart?"
"Easy", I said, "Michelle has long blonde hair and Dave has a moustache."
Criminal suspect identification.
Police detective: 'What can you remember about your mugger?'
Victim: 'He was slim built, with dark hair and wore a cap.'
Police detective: 'Anything else you remember?'
Victim: 'He had a moustache, about 6 foot 2.'
Police detective: That's one h**... of a moustache
It's a boy
Once little jonny was playing in the park when a pregnant woman passes by him.
"So, it's a boy then !!!"
Says little johnny to the woman.
" How do you know"
Asks the woman.
" I could see his moustache through your fly "
Don't you just hate it when you give someone a sincere compliment on their moustache.
Then she suddenly stops talking to you.
A guys car broke down in Alaska.
A mechanic came by to look at it and said "looks like you blew a seal" the guy replies "no thats just frost on my moustache"
I hate it when you sincerely compliment someone's moustache
And suddenly she's not your friend anymore.
My friend told ne he was sleeping with twins.
Me: But how do you tell them apart?
Friend: Sarah has got a great rack and Tom has a moustache.
Stalin is attending the premiere of a Soviet comedy movie with his fellow Party members.
He laughs and grins throughout the film, but after it ends he says, "Well, I liked the comedy. But that clown had a moustache just like mine. Shoot him."
Everyone is speechless, until someone sheepishly suggests, "Comrade Stalin, maybe the actor shaves off his moustache?"
Stalin replies, "Good idea! First shave, then shoot!"
What's the difference between a gay man's moustache and a straight man's moustache?
The smell.
Knock Knock
Who's there?
A moustache.
Moustache who?
I moustache you a question, but I'll shave it for later.
what's the difference between your girlfriend and a walrus...
one has a moustache and smells like fish, and the other is a walrus
