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Mountain Climber Jokes

53 mountain climber jokes and hilarious mountain climber puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about mountain climber that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Mountain Climber Short Jokes

Short mountain climber jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The mountain climber humour may include short climber jokes also.

  1. What do you get when you cross a mosquito with a mountain climber? Nothing! You can't cross a vector with a scaler.
    (Great math joke that came up in Calculus the other day)
  2. Why are climbers always depressed when they reach the top of the mountain? 'Cause it's all downhill from there.
  3. What do you get when you cross a mountain climber and a mosquito? You can't. A mosquito is a vector and the mountain climber is a scaler.
    Courtesy of my physics professor.
  4. I heard we are doing math and science jokes! What do you get when you cross a mountain climber and a tsetse fly? Nothing! You can't cross a scalar and a vector!
  5. Why are most mountain climbers hippies? Because scalars have no direction
    (OC, as far as I know)
  6. What do you get when you cross the Aedes egypti mosquito with a mountain climber? Nothing.
    You can't cross a vector with a scaler.
  7. What did the mountain climber name his horse? Everest. Any time he is bored I see him Mount Everest.
  8. Made in Thailand Have you heard of the mountain climber from Bangkok?
    He became famous as the Thai of the Eiger.
    ~
    Who won the election for mayor of Bangkok?
    It was a Thai.
  9. What do you get if you cross a mountain climber with a mosquito? You can't cross a scalar with a vector!
  10. What do you get when you cross a Rat and a Mountain Climber? Nothing, you can't cross a vector by a scalar.

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Mountain Climber One Liners

Which mountain climber one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with mountain climber? I can suggest the ones about climber mountains and mountain climbing.

  1. Mountain climbers do so much climbing Don't they Everest?
  2. What is a mountain climber's favorite drink? Anything on the rocks.
  3. Someone told me a story of a mountain climber... It ended with a cliffhanger.
  4. Why are stoners such good mountain climbers? because they're used to being high
  5. What did the mountain climber name his son? Cliff
  6. A chinese mountain climber suddenly arrives at the base camp. Supplies everyone!
  7. What did the the mountain climber say to the mountain? I'm sick of your altitude, mister!
  8. What did one insomniac mountain climber say to the other? "Bro, do you everest?"
  9. How did the thermal imaging camera warn the mountain-climber? "Isee cold."
  10. What vocal art did the mountain climber from Dagobah practice? Yoda-ling
  11. What do you call a Mexican mountain climber? Caribeaner

Mountain Climber Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.

What funny jokes about mountain climber you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean mountain man jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make mountain climber pranks.

Since there have been a few math jokes lately...

Q1. What do you get if you cross a mountain lion with a mountain goat?
A1. ||mountain lion|| ||mountain goat|| sin θ
Q2. What do you get when you cross a mountain lion with a mountain climber?
A2. You can't - the mountain climber is a scalar.

Why were the mountain climber's parents disappointed in him?

He was always high! ^(I'm sorry)

A mob boss and a mountain climber are sitting in a bar.

The mob boss says "It's lonely at the top."
The mountain climber says "Of course it is; if you stay there too long you die."

Physics Joke

A mountain climber goes out drinking with his friends.
He starts complaining "My wife called me annoying last night! She compared me to a mosquito." His buddy responded. "You know what they say. You can't cross a vector with a scalar."

Tour guide in the mountain

A guide was leading a group of people on a hike through some mountains. He pointed at a fairly majestic looking peak and said "This one is most popular with mountain climbers. Most days you have a few teams doing a climb. The ascent, depending on your skill level can take between two and five hours. The descent, again depending on your skill level, takes anywhere between 4 hours and 30 seconds."

Downhill Skiing

3 rock climbers (Bob, Tim, Jack) were attempting to climb Everest. In a freak accident, Bob and Tim lost all of their supplies. Unable to progress any further, they decide to make camp and share jack's supplies. The three of them slept side to side, with bob and Tim on either side of jack. In the morning, as they made their way down the mountain, bob was telling the other two about his dream last night. Bob said, "man I dreamt this buxom blonde gave me a vigorous h**... last night." Tim chuckled and said " I dreamt I was getting a h**... from a beautiful woman as well." Jack merely shrugged and said " I dreamed I was downhill skiing."

What did the quadriplegic mountain climber who always wears a bee-keepers mask say to his d**... Sherpa girlfriend?

I can't feel my face when I'm with you.
But I love it.

What happens when you cross a mountain climber with a mosquito?

Nothing, you can't cross a vector with a scaler.

Why did the mountain climber quit halfway through his climb?

He really wasn't feeling up to it.

What happens when you cross a fly and a mountain climber?

Trick question, you can't cross a vector and a scalar.

A mountain climber's dog falls off a cliff just before reaching the peak. He says...

"Dog gone."

Why did the rock climber start l**... the grass on the peak?

He wanted some Mountain Dew.

What do an asthmatic s**... and a one legged mountain climber have in common?

They both have difficulty getting high.

Most avid climbers agree that small mountains are jokes.

They think they're just hill areas.

What did one mountain climber say to the other that would not stop running around?

Do you Everest?

A chinese mountain climber had a birthday.

You should have seen his face when everyone at the base camp yelled: Supplies!

What's the difference between a mosquito and a mountain climber?

Nothing, because you cannot cross a vector and a scalar

A renown climber walks into a mountain bar

A lousy climber doesn't because the bar was too high

There was a young climber named Ed...

There was a young climber named Ed
No mountain could fill him with dread
Then he met a big fatty
named Pumpkin-a**... Patty
And he said, "I'll do Everest instead".

Two mountaineers pass a crevasse during a mountain tour

One climber says to the other: "My travel guide fell into this crevasse last year."
The other mountaineer says: "And didn't that really take you away?"
The mountaineer replies: "No, he was already very old anyway, and besides, some pages were missing!"

How many flat earthers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Three experts in logistics, one metereologist, two cooks plus six foragers, two engineers, two pilots, two drivers, one cartographer, a steward, a communications expert, someone in charge of the journal, eight porters, five mountain climbers, five divers, two armed bodyguards, and a captain for the expedition that will find the secret instructions written 6000 years ago on stone tablets by the Mayas.