The Best 81 Motto Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Motto jokes. There are some motto shakers jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these motto tagline puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 Funniest Motto Jokes and Puns

BBQ joke (OC)

Mmmmmmm. This all reminds me of Fred. His motto was, Low and slow.

He was seriously into barbecue, huh?

No, unfortunately, he was a pilot

What's the motto of the Greek army?

Never leave your buddy's behind.

In lieu of the recent manhunt...

The LAPD's motto is "to protect and serve." I think they ought to change it to "We'll treat you like a King."

What was the motto of the German rocket program?

Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss you'll hit London.

jokes about motto

My blood type is also my life motto:

B Positive

What is the motto for the Epilepsy Research Society?

Sieze the day

I want to start a potato chip company called "dick's."

Our motto would tell you to eat a bag of 'em.

Motto joke, I want to start a potato chip company called "dick's."

So there is a First class only Indian Airline.

Their motto is "We will treat you passengers like Cattle"

My cousin was one of the most ambitious people I ever knew. Unfortunately, he struggled with depression. His life motto?

"Gosh darn it, I'm going to kill myself, or die trying!"

Caesar: Veni, vidi, vici

meaning I came, I saw, I conquered.
Which is probably useful for explaining why the strip club down the street now has the motto:
Veni, vidi, veni.

Did you know the world's first sniper was Mexican? He even inspired the Sniper motto.

Juan shot, Juan kill.

You can explore motto mantra reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean motto fees dad jokes. There are also motto puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

Don't know it till you try it.

Is my motto for checking to see if doors are locked.

What is a prostitutes business motto?

The customer always comes first.

What's a good motto for a sewage treatment plant?

Our duty is clear.

Valar morghulis

the feminist extremists' motto.

What's the motto of the Mexican army?

An Army of Juan

Motto joke, What's the motto of the Mexican army?

I am starting a support group for guys dealing with Autoerotic Asphyxiation.

Our motto is: "Hang in there, we can beat it."

What's the difference between a farmer and a card shark?

The farmer's motto is, "Weed 'em and reap."

What's the motto of an international gang made up of British and French young men?

Chunnel Snakes rule!!

Jared from subway really took the company motto seriously.

You could say he liked to "eat fresh"

What was Jared Fogle's personal motto?

"Eat Fresh"

I'm going to combine a sex shop and a restaurant...

The motto is going to be "First come first serve".

What is Santa's motto?

Wrap your package before you shove it down the chimney.

The "Free Palestine" motto never made sense to me...

No wonder you keep losing land. What Jew could pass on a deal like that?

The Kardashian Family motto:

Getting black men off since the OJ trial.

What is the Italian postal motto?

We know where **you** live, your family too!

Motto joke, What is the Italian postal motto?

Have you heard the ethical rapist's motto?

Give and let live

What's an epileptic's motto?

Carpe diem.

Golden State Warriors motto is "Strength in Numbers"

According to the Jews, The Warriors are going to lose

What's the motto of the Singaporean police?

Big Brudder is watching you

I have a great motto for a sperm bank.

You spank it, we bank it.

America's new motto

If it's worth eating it's worth over eating.

If I owned a restaurant back in the era of racial segregation, do you know what our motto would be?

"The customer's always white."

What's the motto for Child Protective Services?

"You shake em' we take em!"

The World Health Organization have a new motto out this year! (drum roll please)

Who cares... ?

What brand should suicidal people clearly avoid?


Their motto says just "Just do it".

New US dollar announced today...

They've decided to change the motto. After much pressure from atheist groups, they're removing 'In God We Trust' and going back to Latin. However, 'E Pluribus Unum' sounds too foreign and reeks of socialism, so they're going with a more simple and straightforward 'Carpe Vulva'.

The runner up was 'Oh God It's Trump'

What will the presidential candidate for the next election choose as his/her campaign motto?

"Make America *good* again"

I lived my life according to one motto: "Skate or die."

But I can't skate.

What's the difference between a Boy Scout and a guy who fixes bicycle horns?

One's motto is 'Be Prepared', the other's is 'Beep Repaired'

My boss's motto was always "Underpromise and Overdeliver!"

Unfortunately for him, his international shipping company didn't fare well.

What is the motto of a french baker?

no pain no gain

What's the motto of the American Writers Guild?


So, I know a guy and his motto is 'Love Thy Neighbor'

He lives next to a brothel.

Did you hear that United Airlines just updated their motto?

"United Airlines: Beating our competition, AND our passengers, since 1926!"

United Airlines new customer service motto: If you can't beat 'em....

....BEAT 'EM!

Have you heard the new United Airlines motto?

"One drag a day keeps the doctors away!"

United Airlines new motto:

"Our prices can't be beat, but you can."

If *The Twilight Zone* had its own currency, what would its motto be?

"In Rod We Trust."

What's the best motto for a sperm bank?

"You squeeze it, we freeze it"

The perfect motto for a tweed jacket company...

Satisfaction guarantweed


CARPE DIEM! Seize the day is a great motto to live by...

Unless you have epilepsy.

I made a company for exterminating June Beetles...

Our motto is: "We gas the Junes."

Yeah, it's our motto.. What's a motto?

Nothing. What's a-motto with you?...

(If you understand this, god bless you)

My motto in life is to always give 100%

It does make blood donation quite tricky.

My boss's motto was always "Underpromise and overdeliver."

For some reason, his shipping company never took off.

Necrophiliac's motto:

When in doubt, test her out!

What's the motto of an undertaker who is a rapist and a necrophiliac?

You rape what you sew

Sharpie has a new motto...

Once you go black you never go back.

How is Oracle the opposite of Google?

Google's motto is "don't be evil"

My motto is "If at first you don't succeed, try, try again."

They don't let me volunteer for the suicide prevention hotline anymore.

Tide announced the new motto for their pods line.

Cleaning the gene pool since 2017.

The Time Traveler's Motto

If at first you don't succeed, try and try again.

My motto is Efficiency. Efficiency. Efficiency.

Oop. I guess I only need to say it once.

There is a local beer company here in Utah called Polygamy Porter

Their motto is "Beer so good, why not have more than one"

My orthodontist decided to change its motto

Conversion therapy that works

My proposal for the new state motto of Mississippi was denied.

"We're all one big happy family."

What's a racist restaraunts motto?

The customer is always white.

Socialist Motto

We've got what it takes to take what you've got.

What is the motto for the fish stick factory?

In cod we crust.

Hitlers favorite motto


I am starting a company to produce and sell Marijuana infused meat.

Our motto is "A pot in every chicken."

Carpe Diem is a great motto and all...

but if you seize everyday, you probably have epilepsy

What is a Sailors motto?

Never leave your mates behind...

You know what the official motto of reopening restaurants is?

"I'll have what he is having."

What's the motto of an ice cream shop in paradise?

Heaven ice day

I gave my wife a copy of doom

It sucks because each time we try to have sex she goes by the motto RIP and tear until it's done

My ex's motto: "If it ain't broke..."

" it."

What's the motto for the church's spaceflight program?

The Power of Christ Propels You!

What do Nuns and Prostitutes have in common?

They both live by the motto "No money, no sex."

I'll open a bar and call it "The Doctors Office"

Motto: Get your shots here

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the motto hetero puns are supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working motto state mottos piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes