Most Epic Jokes
61 most epic jokes and hilarious most epic puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about most epic that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Most Epic Short Jokes
Short most epic jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The most epic humour may include short epic jokes also.
- Steve Jobs would've been a better president than Trump. But I guess comparing apples to orange is unfair.
- All these video games with epic orchestral music scores. Those concerned mums were right, there's way too much violins in video games.
- People need to learn how to take a compliment... Just today I complimented the most epic mustache I've ever seen and the lady didn't even say thanks.
- Gabe Newell and Bill Gates should get together. Not only would there be some epic games, they could comfort each other's inability to count.
- When Chris Pine was approached to star in Christopher Nolan's new war time epic.. "No thanks I've done Kirk"
- When the Jews wandered in a desert for four whole decades, surely it went from epic fail to epoch fail
- Some random guy told me that if I gave him my Epic username and password, he'd get me 1,337,420 vbucks. I did, and for some reason I can't log on to my account. Can anyone help me?
- When you think about it Elon Musk firing that Tesla towards mars is the most epic mike drop in human history thus far. It still hasn't landed.
- I once watched an old epic-historical romance film about a couple, but I can't find it... I guess it's gone with the wind...
- Developers with New Game Ideas "Ok I got it. Here's my epic title. Patent pending! Subjugate The Rest of the World...sounds fun right?"
Where do I have to travel to play this game?
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Most Epic One Liners
Which most epic one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with most epic? I can suggest the ones about most iconic and coolest.
- I was on a date with a girl that works at Epic Games... She was unreal.
- This one time, people completely overused a word and ruined it forever. It was epic.
- What do you call an Epic Cow? Legend Dairy
- Did you hear the one about Gilgamesh? It was epic.
- I took a picture of the 5th letter of the alphabet today Epic
- This was the epic top comment on my Joke. " there doesn't seem to be anything here "
- What do you call an epic space opera set during the Russian Revolution? Tsar Wars
- Me to my friend : I am happy everyone doesn't have cancer. Epic games : Hold my beer
- Epic skateboarding fails 2015
- Epic camping trip last weekend!! It was in tents.
- Epics games Where games are epic
- 2,560,147,913 m/s is epic.
- This epic social network called Vent allows you to anonymously Vent
- My Gladiator DVD stopped working... Talk about an *epic* fail.
- Epic Cooler Prank Best prank ever *must watch*
Most Epic Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about most epic you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean most entertaining jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make most epic pranks.
Drunken Epicness
A man comes home one night after being at the local bar. He is absolutely smashed as he collapses on his bed next to his wife and falls asleep.
The next morning he wakes up to breakfast in bed. Toast, Egg and Bacon, Juice and Coffee. He is very confused, so he asks his son as he passes his bedroom, who made him this breakfast.
"Mom did", he says.
"Why?", asks the man, "This is the first time in years she has made me breakfast in bed."
"When you got home and fell asleep", says the son, "you were still wearing your clothes, so Mom tried to undress you so you would sleep more comfortably. Then you started yelling "Get off me woman! I am married!""
The epic journey of the s**... cell
Once upon a time, a brand new s**... cell was being instructed by an older s**... cell.
"Right," he said, "this is what's going to happen: one day you'll be having a nap and you'll hear a siren. You rush out as fast as can, make absolutely sure you swim as hard as you can, because you HAVE to be first! You'll enter a long, wet pink tunnel, and you have to swim right to the end. When you get to the end, you'll see a round red ball. You say to the ball: 'Hi, I'm a s**... cell,' and the round red ball will say: 'Hi, I'm an egg cell,' and then the miracle of conception will occur."
"Don't worry sir," said the new s**... cell, "I won't let you down!"
A little while later, the new s**... cell is having a nap and he hears the siren!
Fast as lightning, he dashes off, swimming as fast as can. He enters the wet pink tunnel, looks behind himself and sees other s**... cells catching up to him, so he swims even faster! Furthur into the pink tunnel he swims, till he looks behind and realises he's first!
Finally, after he thinks he can't carry on any longer, he sees the round red ball.
"Yes," he cries out, "I've made it! Hi, I'm a s**... cell."
The round red ball turns to him and says: "Hi, I'm a tonsil."
Two martial artists...
...are arguing over who would win a fight between a skilled swordsman carrying a broadsword and a master wielder of an épée. They agree that the only way to settle the argument is actually to fight one another, each using one of the two weapons. An epic battle ensues and then, the two swordsmen feinted.
A couple was walking down the street when an alien spaceship landed in front of them...
An alien couple exited the spaceship and said, ''Hello, earthlings, we come in peace and we want you to tell us all about your planet.''
They talked for hours, until they came to the subject of s**.... The humans told the aliens how humans have s**... and the aliens were in shock! It sounded very similar to the way the aliens did it so, in the interest of intergalactic friendship and exploration, they decided to trade partners for the night.
When the woman saw the alien man undress, she immediately laughed. The alien looked down and said, ''Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot.'' And he hit his head twice and it grew to epic proportions. The woman had the greatest s**... of her life.
The next morning the man asked the woman, ''How was it?''
The woman replied, ''Great! You?''
The man said, ''It s**.... For some reason the alien woman kept hitting me on the head, screaming, 'It's broken! It's broken!'''
The City Slicker and The Farmer
**City Slicker:** There sure are a lot of flies around here. Don't you ever shoo them?
**Farmer:** No. we just let them go barefoot.
****
^*From ^the ^epic ^fantasy ^adventure ^novel ^Silly ^Summertime ^Jokes*
Even the first puns ever were corny
The first pun ever recorded is in the Epic of Gilgamesh. It states that the heavens will drop kibtu which stands for corn. But kibtu was a pun for kibittu which means misery. I guess even the first puns were corny...
Nan 'n' Fran
**Nan:** What part of a fish weighs the most?
**Fran:** Its scales.
****
*^From ^the ^epic ^fantasy ^adventure ^novel: ^101 ^Silly ^Summertime ^Jokes*
Epic fact: Everything that happens in Germany is depressing.
The Irishman was amazing.
Long, but amazing. It wasn’t the only epic movie. Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, nearly three hours long. Leonardo DiCaprio attended the premiere, and by the end, his date was too old for him. Even Prince Andrew’s like, “Come on, Leo, mate. You’re nearly 50, son.”
You don't have to be good at anagrams
to see that Pope Benedict is an Epic Bent p**....
The average person has s**... 90 times a year.
Man this going to be an epic new years eve!
What would be the most epic celebrity game show episode ever?
Stephen Hawking on Hole in the Wall.
Harley Morenstein has teamed up with a top Hollywood producer to create an Epic Meal Time spin off...
Introducing... Harvey Weinstein, in... Epic Feel time!
Man: bacon. Other man: le epic style
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I'm hiring a group of time travellers to come on an epic mission to fight crime across the 4th dimension.
If you're interested, interview was yesterday
Right before I die, i'm going to s**... a bag of popcorn kernels.
My cremation is going to be epic.
The average man has s**... about 90 times a year.
My next three weeks will be epic!
To The Jamaican Bobsled Team
After the Winter Olympics, one fellow is so taken with the Jamaican bobsled team that he decides that they deserve an epic scale statue in Jamaica. He travels to Jamaica, and talks with every government official and rich person he can find. All of them chase him off saying that it's a crazy idea, and never bother them again. Finally, despondent at his reception, he goes to a shore side bar, and starts drinking this troubles away. The bartender, in that wonderful island accent asks what the problem is. The fellow goes through the spiel again. The bartender thinks for a moment and says:
"Mon, you mental!"
To which the fellow responds:
"Finally! Someone gets it!"
Groan?
I was talking to a feminist today when she told me about the Dwayne Johnson Rule.
I'd never heard of it before but apparently in order to determine if a particular comment is appropriate to say to a woman, you should first ask yourself, Would I be comfortable saying this to Dwayne Johnson? If not, don't say it.
I thought this sounded like a great rule, so I told her, Your chest is epic.
I said to my teenage son "There are two words I'm hearing a lot, and they're starting to grate"
"I'd like you to stop using them so much, please. One of them is 'cringe' and the other is 'epic'. Do you think you could manage that?"
He said "Sure, Dad -- what are the two words?"
A man was driving to work when a truck ran a stop sign, hit his car broadside, and knocked him out cold.
A Passersby pulled him from the wreckage and revived him.
He began an Epic struggle and had to be tranquilized by the medics. Later, when he had calmed down, they asked him why he had struggled so.
He said, a bit sheepishly, "I remember the impact, then nothing. I woke up on a concrete slab in front of this huge, flashing sign. Turns out somebody was standing in front of the 'S' on the 'Shell' sign."
Psychedelic Harmony..
There I was, in the middle of nowhere.. Not a body for miles around.. As I lay in the silence, I started hearing murmurs; whispers of tales and epics long past.. The silence was talking to me.. I fell into a sweet melancholy.. As I listened to the silence, a calm trance took hold of me, the harmony of nature was filling up my soul.. The flurry of unknown sensations kept stimulating my senses, and I started to wonder how I got here and what was happening to me.. Then it dawned on me,
My brother must have kept the cookies hidden for a reason..