Mosque Jokes
50 mosque jokes and hilarious mosque puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about mosque that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Mosque Short Jokes
Short mosque jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The mosque humour may include short synagogue jokes also.
- Police in London have found a bomb outside a mosque. They've told the public not to panic as they've managed to push it inside.
- A bartender walks into... ...a church, a temple and a mosque.
He has no idea how jokes work. - The British Islamic Association has said there is no longer room for extremists within their mosques... Although a waiting list has been set up.
- I lost my job as an architect after my first day Apparently a revolving mosque makes it difficult to pray towards Mecca.
Cr - Why don't churches, synagogues, mosques and temples have Wi-Fi? Because religions don't like competing with an invisible power that actually works.
- Muhammad walks up to the Buddha and says "Guess what a mosque and 9 year old have in common." I've been in both.
- What's the difference between a church and a mosque? In a church you see pew, pew pew.
In a mosque you hear pew pew pew. - What's the difference between a Pakistani mosque and a Afghanistan mosque and an Iraqi mosque? How should I know, I just fly the drones.
- Two goats walk into a mosque.... And the priest welcomed Kareem Abdul-Jabbar and Muhammad Ali to his sermon.
- Where do you go when you need something to munch on when you're in a mosque? To the AllahuSnackBar!
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Mosque One Liners
Which mosque one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with mosque? I can suggest the ones about mecca and temple.
- Where are Muslims going to pray when they go to Mars? Elon's Mosque
- The Islamic temple I went to had a weird smell... it was a strange mosque
- Where does Elon Musk pray? The Elon Mosque
- Where do Russian Muslims pray ? Mosque'O
- What do you call a place of religious worship for Tesla cars? An Elon Mosque
- How many Muslims fit in a Mosque Allahlot
- If Elon converted to Islam, what would his muslim name be? Elon Mosque.
- What do you call a Mosque in Asia A North Korean Nuclear Bomb Test Site
- What does a mosque and a 9 year old girl have in common? Prophet Mo's been in both.
- Went to Mosque asked wifi password
- What kind of chips do Muslims eat at church? Mosque-itos
- What has four legs and ten arms? My pitbull in a mosque
- Mosques are great! If you time it right there's free shoes outside!
^*Cr - Why is Jif the preferred peanut butter at the mosque? Because choosy imams choose Jif.
- What's the Wifi password in a mosque? AllahIsTheOne2345
Share Hilarious Mosque Jokes and Enjoy Unforgettable Laughter
What funny jokes about mosque you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean cathedral jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make mosque pranks.
Bob and Steve, two non-Muslim friends...
Bob and Steve, two non-Muslim friends who happen to be lost in a desert. After days of walking without any water or food, they noticed a Mosque. Bob said: "Yes, thank God! I will walk in saying that my name is
Mohamed, and you say that
your name is Ahmed, this way
we'll get some food! Deal?"
Steve said: "No, I'm sticking
with my name."
They walked into the Mosque
and the Sheikh saw them.
The Sheikh asked: "What are
your names?"
Bob said: "My name is
Mohamed."
Steve said: "My name is Steve."
Sheikh said: "Guys, please bring
some food and water for Steve.
And you Mohamed, Ramadan
Mubarak!!
Muslim Band
I went to see a Muslim Tribute band last night at a Mosque.
They were called "Bomb Jovi" and I thought they were brilliant.
They performed songs like:
"Losing my Head over You",
"Rocket Launcher Man",
"You're Six, you're Beautiful, and you're Mine".
Their last song "Living on a Prayer Mat" almost brought the house down!
Then I heard this Muslim guy saying he had the entire Koran on a DVD.
I was interested, so I asked him, "Can you burn me a copy?"
Well that was when the trouble started.
A Bar opened opposite a Mosque!
The angry congregants of the Mosque prayed daily against the business....
Days later the Bar was struck by lightning and caught fire .
The Bar owner sued the Mosque authorities for the cause , as an action by their prayer...
The Mosque denied all responsibility!
So, the judge commented:
It's difficult to decide the case because we have a Bar owner who believes in the power of prayer and an entire group of Mosque congregants that does not believe in it !!!
The case is hereby dismissed!
Two Americans were trekking in a desert.
Dehydrated and hungry, they walked into a mosque.
The Imam asked for their names.
Mark thought: Maybe it's wiser to pretend to be a Muslim. So he replied: My name is Ahmed.
Sam said: My name is Sam.
The Imam called his servant over, who handed Sam some food and water.
He then turned to Mark and said: Happy Ramadan, brother Ahmed.
Two guys got lost in the Egyptian desert
Both christians, one named John and the other named Thomas. They were starving and about to collapse when they spotted a Mosque, They rushed there for help. The Imam came out and asked for their names, John came up with 'Abdullah' in a panic and Thomas just said his name. The Imam hastily told the patrons to give Thomas food and water. While John had to wait and finish his fast.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A young muslim in saudi arabia is wondering if he is allowed to some m**.... So, he visits his local mosque and asks his Imam if it's permissible, so the Imam told him:
No. In our country, only g**... get s**....
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
When Elon Musk converts to Islam
He'd be Elon Mosque.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why Islam is growing rapidly !!!
Father Francis of Bradford was unhappy that the church attendance had steadily declined in the past few years but the mosque across the street was jampacked every Friday.
So he invited the imam for a cup of tea and then finally brought up the topic
Imam :So tell me,what happens if a man visits church every Sunday and follows the word of Jesus
Father: He will go to heaven after he dies
Imam: What will he get there?
Father: He will forever be in the company of Father,Jesus,Holy Spirit,v**... Mary...
Imam: Thats the problem, Only One v**......
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Did you hear about that new space mosque?
It's Allah this world!
A bartender walks into a cathedral, a mosque, and a synagogue...
Has no concept of joke-telling.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
2 men were lost in the desert
Their car broke down and they were wandering for hours. It's midday and the sun was scorching hot. They're lost, hungry and their t**... were parched. In the distance they saw a huge mosque.
Man 1: Let's pretend to be Muslims and they'll give us food and water.
Man 2: You go ahead and do that. I'm not gonna lie.
They reached the mosque and met the imam. The imam greeted them and asked what were their names.
Man 1: My name is Abdullah.
Man 2: My name is Thomas.
The Imam turned to his assistant as told him, "Give Brother Thomas some food and water. Brother Abdullah will break his fast with us at 7.28pm."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Do mosquitos come from a mosque?
Because they sure love killing people.
Two Christians are lost in an Arabian desert
David and Michael were going on a safari where they got lost and their car stopped working, they started wondering throughout the desert. With food and water supply almost ending and no reception anywhere they were desperately looking for help. After a very long time in the heat of the desert and almost dying from thirst they finally see a mosque far away. They start discussing among each other. David: I'll pretend my name is Mohammed so they will give me food and water! Michael: I don't care I won't change my name for food! As they go to the mosque, the Muslims rush to their aid. David says he's Mohammed and Michael says he's Michael. So the Muslims get water and food fast for Michael and as David was waiting for his turn the Muslims turn around for him and say... "You know it's Ramadan, right?"!
Two Christians are lost in a desert
David and Michael were going on a safari where they got lost and their car stopped working, they started wondering throughout the desert. With food and water supply almost ending and no reception anywhere they were desperately looking for help.
After a very long time in the heat of the desert and almost dying from thirst they finally see a mosque far away. They start discussing among each other.
David: I'll pretend I am a Muslim so they will give me food and water!
Michael: I don't care I am a proud Christian and I will not pretend to be someone else just for food.
As they go to the mosque, the Muslims rush to their aid. David says he's a Muslim and Michael says he's Christian.
So the Muslims get water and food fast for Mike and as David was waiting for his turn the Muslims turn around for him and say... "You know it's Ramadan, right"!
