Mort Jokes
23 mort jokes and hilarious mort puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about mort that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Mort Short Jokes
Short mort jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The mort humour may include short lure jokes also.
- What do you get when you cross a Swedish tennis pro, a computer virus, and an insatiable hunger for mort flesh? Cyborg Bjorn Borg hosting smorgasbords at the morgue.
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Great Mort Jokes to Share, Laugh and Enjoy with Friends
What funny jokes about mort you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean psalm jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make mort pranks.
Did you know Mortal Kombat was based on an old Scandinavian song?
A Finnish hymn.
The morticians wife.
The mortician gets a call to come pick up Schultz, who dies unexpectedly. While getting him ready for the f**..., he can't help but notice Schultz has a freakishly huge male member. So he cuts it off, puts it in a bag, and brings it home to show his wife this amazing specimen.
He gets home and says, " Honey come look at the amazing thing I found at work today!" She comes over, takes a look in the bag and shrieks loudly, "Oh my God! Schultz is dead!"
Mortal Kombat
Did you know mortal kombat is based on an old nordic folk song?
Well it's technically a Finnish hymn
The Mortal Kombat theme song
Was adapted from an old Scandinavian church song.
It's a Finnish Hymn.
Why was the mortgage so clingy?
It hated being alone.
Did you know Mortal Kombat is based off a scandinavian church song?
It was called Finnish Hymn.
Did you know Mortal Kombat was actually based on an old Scandinavian worship song?
A Finnish Hymn.
2 morticians are standing by the coffee machine
"Man, you wont believe what I experienced today. I had a woman with a c**... like a pickle" says one of them.
"What?!" says the other one "That big?!"
"No," says the man "That sour"
Two mortal enemies get lost in the desert...
Two mortal enemies get lost in the desert. "It's all your fault!" Guy #1 says. "No, it's all your fault!" Guy #2 says. Suddenly, guy #1 finds a genie lamp. The genie appears, and says, "I can grant each of you one wish.". Guy #1 says, "I want 2x what he gets!". "Very well, what is your wish, Guy #2?" The genie asked. Guy #2 grinned, and says, "I want to be beaten half to death!"
Why'd the mortician get fired?
For sleeping around the office
How do morticians practice driving backwards?
They rehearse.
How did the mortician get the money to pay his bills?
He urned it.
A Mortal Kombat character walks into a store..
Employee: "Finding everything okay, sir?"
Character: "Yes, I'm just Lui Kang."
Why do morticians have high salaries?
Because they are big urners.
Why did the first mortgage seek out a second mortgage?
Because it didn't like being a loan.
Last mortgage payment!
A guy walks into a bar and orders a bottle of champagne. "Congratulations to me! I just made my last mortgage payment!" the guy announces. "I mean, I still owe $273,000, I just can't pay it any more."
Do you know how morticians get better at getting caskets to f**... homes?
They rehearse it.
A mortician died in a small town
He showed up to work late
What did the mortician say to his new necrophiliac employee?
Don't worry, you'll fit right in.
Two mortgate brokers are chatting in a bar
The first says, "An honest woman is a good investment."
The other replies, "True, but a woman with no principle gets a lot of interest!"
Mortgages are going up....
But you try telling a homeless person how lucky they are!
What's the morticians favorite exercise?
The deadlift.
