Morning Giggle Jokes
8 morning giggle jokes and hilarious morning giggle puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about morning giggle that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Morning Giggle Funny Jokes to Tell Your Friends and Kids.
What is a good morning giggle joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
A blonde walks into a drycleaners
and says 'good morning' to the elderly attendant and hands him a blouse. The man didn't hear too well and asked, "Come again"?
The blonde turned red and giggled. "No, just mayonnaise this time."
The Mother Superior assembles all the nuns
"This morning," she announces, "the gardener found a c**... in the rhododendron bushes!"
Ninety-nine nuns gasp in horror, one giggles "Tee-hee!"
"And it had been used!" the Mother Superior adds.
Ninety-nine nuns gasp in horror, one giggles "Tee-hee!"
"...And there was a hole in it!" says the Mother Superior.
Ninety-nine nuns giggle "Tee-hee!", one gasps in horror.
In 1978, a Russian man buys a Lada...
After he signs the last form, the salesman says, "You can expect delivery on 4 February, 1981."
The man replies, "Morning or evening?"
This is not the reaction that the salesman expects. The most common reaction, of course, is resigned disappointment. Anger was a close second. He'd seen some giggle at the absurdity, and some swear they'd be calling influential friends.
But this? The salesman is dumbfounded. "Morning or evening?! What does it matter! It's in over 2 years!"
"Well," says the man, "It's just that the heater repairman is coming that morning."
There was once a man who woke up every morning and f**... really loudly...
Every day he would wake up, release the pressure, and his wife would say in disgust "one of these days, you're going to f**... your guts out". So one Thanksgiving, the wife got up early to start fixing the feast for the day. As she was removing the giblets from the turkey, she had an idea. Sneaking back up to the bedroom, she carefully lifted the back of her husbands pajamas and placed the giblets into his pants, then snuck back downstairs and continued her work. After a while, she heard her husbands alarm go off and, just as every morning, the eruptive release of high pressure gasses. She giggled to herself and her small prank, and waited for him to come down stairs. Five minutes went by, and there was no sign of him, but she kept preparing the meal. Ten minutes...Fifteen...and now she was a little worried so she went up to check on him. She noticed the bathroom light was on, so she knocked on the door and asked "honey are you ok?" He came out and sheepishly replied "Well, it finally happened. I f**... my guts out. But by the grace of god, and these two fingers, I was able to get them back in."
One night in a nunnery.
One nun is secretly sneaking a man into the convent to have s**... with him. The following morning, the Mother Superior calls all of the 100 sisters together. She tells them, "Sisters, I have some terrible news. I know there was a man in the convent last night."
99 nuns gasp, one nun giggles.
"I know he had s**... with one of you."
99 nuns gasp, one nun giggles.
"I found a c**... in one of the beds."
99 nuns gasp, one nun giggles.
"I found a hole in the c**...."
99 nuns giggle, one nun gasps.
A young lady was walking through a field in Scotland...
...when she noticed a man passed out against a tree. Curious of what men wore underneath their kilts, she decided there was no better time to find out. She giggled softly, took her ribbon, and tied it at a strategic location.
The next morning the Scotsman woke up with a terrible hangover and needed to relieve himself. He stood up, lifted his kilt, and noticed a ribbon. He belted, "Laddie, I don't know what it was I was doing last night, but I'm sure glad to see you won a blue ribbon for it!"
Girls night out
Two young married women were having a girls night out on the town. Walking home from the bar they both realized they needed to pee. They saw a cemetary across the street and decided to go behind the headstones. Having nothing to wipe with, the first girl takes off her p**..., wipes, then tosses them. The second girl doesn't want to toss her expensive p**... so she grabs a card out of some flowers and uses that. Giggling, they continue home.
The next morning the husband of the first girl calls the husband of the second and says "these girls nights out have to stop! My wife came home without her underwear last night!" The second husband says "you think that's bad, my wife came home with a card between her butcheeks that said We'll all miss you! Lots of love, the guys at firestation #19!"
An old couple had been married for 30 years...
And every morning for those three decades, at precisely 6:30 am, the man would release a horrendous f**... that would gag a maggot! His wife would be awakened by said f**... and the man would laugh. Oftentimes he would give her the ole' "Dutch Oven". Every time, however, the disgusted wife would exclaim "One day, you're gonna f**... your guts out!". The husband would then laugh harder and perhaps wave a little more foul air in her direction.
One day, it was thanksgiving. The wife gets up much earlier to begin food preparation for the feast. As she is removing the innards of her fleshy killed turkey, she gets an idea. She gathers up the fowl gut and brings them upstairs to her sleeping husband. She then deposited the entrails into the back of his jockeys. She returns to her kitchen and waits for 6:30.
When 6:30 arrives, she hears the earth shattering flatulence all the way downstairs which is followed immediately by a despairing cry. The woman giggles behind her hand.
Several minutes later, her husband comes to her kitchen, white-faced and wide-eyed. He says, "All this time, you were right. I finally f**... my guts out!" The wife says, " My goodness! Really?". He replies, "Yeah, but I got em' all back in."
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