Morning After Pill Jokes
24 morning after pill jokes and hilarious morning after pill puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about morning after pill that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Morning After Pill Short Jokes
Short morning after pill jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The morning after pill humour may include short morning sickness jokes also.
- On the back of a pack of condoms it said: "Keep away from children." So now I have to get her the morning after pill.
- I accidentally took my birth control pill twice yesterday and when I woke up this morning, one of my kids was gone.
- My co-worker takes a small blue pill with his coffee every day at 8am He's likes to work hard in the mornings
- Morning after The morning after pill...did you know it's called the "anti-baby pill" in Germany? And in Sweden it's called the "regret pill". However in Chicago it's called the "crime fighter" pill.
- The c**... broke last night, but the pharmacist said the morning after pill would prevent conception. They must not work, though. I took one as soon as I woke up and she still got pregnant.
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Morning After Pill One Liners
Which morning after pill one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with morning after pill? I can suggest the ones about morning dew and birth control.
- There's now a morning after pill for guys. It changes your blood type.
- TIL there is a new type of morning-after pill, and it's
for men! It changes blood type. - Anyone hear about the new morning after pill for men? It changes their blood type
- Did you all hear about this morning after pill? Or what I like to call breakfast in bed.
- Mimosa's The morning after pill for an alcoholic's hangover.
- Your momma so n**... She went to rehab for morning after pills addiction!!
Morning After Pill Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about morning after pill you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean morning people jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make morning after pill pranks.
Granny goes to the doctor.
She tells the doctor:
Look I have a big problem.
I have so SO much gas, thankfully it is not loud or smelly, but I need something about it.
Doctor said: Ok ask the pharmacist for this medication, take 1 pill each morning and come back in a week.
So the granny goes in a week later and says: What is going on, everything is all the same but now the gases are extremely smelly, what did you do?
So the doctor take a camera device and checks her nostrils inside and says: Ok now that the nostrils are no longer blocked, let's see about the ears.
An elderly woman went into the doctor's office.
When the doctor asked why she was there, she replied, "I'd like to have some birth-control pills."
Taken aback, the doctor thought for a minute and then said, "Excuse me, Mrs. Smith, but you're 72 years old. What possible use could you have for birth control pills?"
The woman responded, "They help me sleep better."
The doctor thought some more and continued, "How in the world do birth control pills help you to sleep?"
The woman said, "Simple. I put them in my granddaughter's orange juice every morning and I sleep better at night."
Tom had this problem of getting up late in the morning and was always late for work.
His boss was mad at him and threatened to fire him if he didn't do something about it.
So Tom went to his doctor who gave him a pill and told him to take it before he went to bed.
Tom slept well and in fact beat the alarm in the morning. He had a leisurely breakfast and drove cheerfully to work.
"Boss", he said, "The pill actually worked!"
"That's all fine" said the boss, "But where were you yesterday?"
What if instead of a "morning after pill"....
They made a "right before pill" that you take before s**...... And what if they tasted like mints so you had fresh breath for kissing too...
We could call them Pre-d**...-a-mints.
Silent and Odourless
An old man visited his doctor for help with a problem.
"Doc, I don't know what's wrong, but I f**... all the time. It's weird because they are silent and odourless, but they keep coming out. In fact, I've f**... about 6 times just sitting here. What can I do?"
The doctor replied, "Here, take one of these pills every morning and then come see me in a week."
A week later, the old man came back to the doctor and he was upset. "Doc, those pills didn't help - they made it worse! I'm still f**..., but now they stink something fierce!"
The doctor replied, "Calm down, sir. Now that we've cleared your sinuses, we can work on your hearing."
A man went to the doctor this morning as he hadn't been feeling well.
The doctor examined him, left the room and came back with three different bottles of pills.
He said, Take the green pill with a big glass of water when you get up. Take the blue pill with a big glass of water after lunch. Then just before going to bed, take the red capsule with another big glass of water.
Afraid that he was suffering from a deadly disease, the man stammered, By God, Doc, what's my problem?
The doctor said, You're not drinking enough water.
Bill struggled to get up early in the morning and was always late for work.
His boss got fed up of his being late always and so threatened to fire him if he didn't get his act together.
So Bill went to see his doctor who gave him a pill and told him to take it just before going to bed.
Bill did this, and slept very well and actually beat the alarm clock by two hours. So he fixed himself a nice breakfast and drove happily to work, in plenty of time for the start of the work day.
When he got there, he said, "Boss, that pill the doctor gave me actually worked!"
His boss said, "That's great, but where were you yesterday?"
A doctor on his morning walk noticed an old lady sitting on her front step smoking a cigar
A doctor on his morning walk noticed an old lady sitting on her front step smoking a cigar
So he walked up to her and said, "I couldn't help but notice how happy you look! What is your secret?"
"I smoke ten cigars a day," she said. '"Before I go to bed, I smoke a nice big joint. Apart from that, I drink a whole bottle of Jack Daniels every week, and eat only junk food. On weekends, I pop pills, get laid, and don't exercise at all."
'"That is absolutely amazing! How old are you?"
"Thirty-four," she replied.