Morbidly Jokes
55 morbidly jokes and hilarious morbidly puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about morbidly that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
This article explores morbidly jokes from a unique perspective. Explore the gruesome stories that a morbidly obese boy with a fedora would tell, as well as the jokes a bulimic would make in order to cope with their situation. Read on to discover dark humor in an unexpected place.
Funniest Morbidly Short Jokes
Short morbidly jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The morbidly humour may include short terminally jokes also.
- My friend was told by her doctor that she was morbidly obese. As if she doesn't have enough on her plate.
- What do you call 2 fat goths? Morbidly obese.
I know I shouldnt joke about obese people they've got enough on their plate. - What's the difference between dark humor and morbid humor? dark humor is 10 babies in a trash can.
Morbid humor is one baby in 10 trash cans. - Q: What do pregnant teenagers and their unborn babies have in common?
A: Both their moms are going to kill them! - Doctor: ""If you gain 5 more pounds, medically, you'll be morbidly obese." "Do you understand what this means?"
Woman: "Yes, I'm not morbidly obese now." - Q: How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: I don't know, there are twenty in my basement, and my basement light still isn't fixed. - What is the difference between black, morbid and brutal humor? Black humor - 12 children in one trash can
Morbid humor - 1 children in 12 trash cans
Brutal humor - 12 trash cans in one children - How are morbidly obese people and child molesters alike? Both want to get into smaller pants.
- Q: What is brown, small, and smells of caramel?
A: A diabetic who's been struck by lightning. - What's in common with Chinese Rockets and telling morbid jokes to my friends? They never land properly.
Share These Morbidly Jokes With Friends
Morbidly One Liners
Which morbidly one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with morbidly? I can suggest the ones about mortuary and deadly.
- I'm not a necrophile... I'm just morbidly curious.
- Q: What has 2 arms, 3 legs, and 4 feet?
A: The finish line at the Boston Marathon. - Q: Why did hitter kill himself?
A: Because he could not pay the gas bill. - Why didn't the pc gamer cross the street ? Because he's morbidly obese
- What is the medical term for a fat cow? Morbidly o-beef
- Morbid Humor What did one casket say to the other casket?
Was that you coffin? - What do you call a morbidly obese vegetarian? Megafauna.
- Saw an over weight goth today, I thought to myself, he's morbidly obese.
- What has more brains than a dead baby?
The wall behind it. - My psychic is 500 lbs and morbidly obese. They're a four-chin teller.
- What do you call a morbidly obese person who can predict the future? A four-chin teller.
- What do you buy a dead baby for its birthday?
A dead puppy! - Q: What's red, white, and cries a lot?
A: A baby with a razor! - Q: What do you call a 100 lack people in the ocean?
A: An oil spill - [MORBID] What do black people and apples have in common? They both look better hanging.
Morbidly Obese Jokes
Here is a list of funny morbidly obese jokes and even better morbidly obese puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I really want my own reality show on TLC. Did I mention that I am a morbidly obese little person with 18 children and I just escaped from Scientology!
- They classified a guy I work with morbidly obese which seems a little harsh... I mean, he has enough on his plate already.
- A new test was conducted to study how fat Americans are getting; the test results are as follows: 60% are deemed overweight
30% are deemed morbidly obese
10% ate the test
- When you're morbidly obese, you get shut down by lots of people. But the worst is when it comes from parents... MOTHER NATURE AND FATHER TIME.
- The lives of morbidly obese people are like hourglasses If they don't get turned upside down soon enough, they will be done.
- In High School they used to call me Big Tim, but it wasn't because of my height, Ladies ;).... .....its because I was Morbidly Obese.
- How much did the morbidly obese Chinese woman weigh? Wonton.
- What do you call a morbidly obese hippy? Tie Dyeabetes
- Most people don't know that boulders are morbidly obese. It's from having a sedimentary lifestyle.
- After charging morbidly obese people extra for their plane seats, air traffic companies hatched a plan to schedule special flights for morbidly obese people in the future... but it never took off.
Fun-Filled Morbidly Jokes to Boost Your Mood
What funny jokes about morbidly you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean miserably jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make morbidly pranks.
A lady with a morbid fear of drowning is on a ship in the middle of an ocean. Nervously , she asks a crew member 'just how far away from land are we?' Calmly, he reassures her ' you have nothing to worry about ,we're only 5 kilometers from land.' Relieved, she inquires 'oh, in which direction?'
That would be straight down, Miss........
A woman with a morbid fear of drowning is on a ship in the middle of an ocean. Nervously,she asks a crew member 'how far away from land are we?' He reassures her' don't worry,we're only 5 miles from land'. Relieved, she says 'oh,in which direction?'
'That would be straight down Ma'am', he replies..
In a crime scene....
"So, Rookie, What do you make of all this?"
"Well, the vic was found n**... in bed, severely beaten to death. Sounds like a clear cut m**... case if you ask me"
"close. Our prime suspect is his wife, a morbidly obese woman who says he asked to be on the bottom during s**..."
"So it was a s**... then...."
Q: What did h**... get his granddaughter for her 5th birthday?
A: An easy bake oven.
I remember having this little plastic cut out shapes to help with drawing when I was little.
I used to be really obsessive about them actually, I'd spend hours. But there would always be more to draw around.
Then I had this realization, that I'd never be done. I'd run out before I could finish. It was weirdly horrifying and morbid.
But anyway that's the story of my first extra stencil crisis.
A Corpulent Woman visits the Doctor
Woman: Hey Doc, everytime I walk up the stairs my back hurts and my heart beats like crazy.
Doc: I imagined something like that right when you walked in here. You're morbidly obese.
Woman: That's outrageous. I want a second opinion!
Doc: Alrigt, you're also pretty ugly.
Q: How many dead babies can you fit in a blender?
A: I don't know, I just like to hear them scream.
Q: How do you get them out?
A: Chips.
Q: What does your Mama and a slinky have in common?
A: They aren't much to look at but you can't help cracking a smile when you see it tumbling down the stairs.