Mop Jokes
47 mop jokes and hilarious mop puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about mop that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Mop Short Jokes
Short mop jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The mop humour may include short skeleton jokes also.
- What's the difference between an Art major and a guy who mops bathrooms at KFC? One has a job.
- My 82 year old Grandpa's favorite joke A skeleton walks into a bar, sits down and says
"I'll have a beer and a mop" - A skeleton walks into a bar... Bartender: What'll be?
Skeleton: give me a beer and a mop. - I was mopping and my boss asked why the floors were all covered in water "Just gettin' her wet first. You know, a little floor-play"
- My first job out of high school was delivering fish... I used to stand in the river, mopping the fish's head, and just comfortingly saying, "Deep breath, now push, push again, you're almost there..."
- Want to give your wife a gift she will always remember? Get her a mop. Trust me, she will never forget.
- My wife went out last night. She told me to do the dishes and mop the floor before she gets home. I said, NO… I'll mop the floor and then do the dishes! I don't have to do what you say!
- Short Dad Joke These kind of jokes always make me laugh a little, if you don't get it at first.. think about it!
"A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop." - My wife said, I've never seen you mop or vacuum in my life! I said, Floors are beneath me.
- A cop tells his sergeant, "Wow, a woman shot her husband for stepping on the floor she just mopped" "Oh, so you have arrested her then?" The sergeant asked.
"No, not yet. The floor is still wet."
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Mop One Liners
Which mop one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with mop? I can suggest the ones about janitor and sponge.
- I got into a one-sided fight with a mop Wiped the floor with it.
- How does kurt cobain collect his thoughts? With a mop.
- A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer.... and a mop.
- I splurged and bought a mop... I had to. To clean up the splurge.
- Say it out loud Knock knock
Who's there?
Smell Mop - A skeleton walks into a bar... And says "gimme a beer and a mop."
- How do witches fly in the rain? With a mop.
- Are knock knock jokes allowed? Knock knock...
"Who's there?"
I eat mop.... - The cleaning lady refused to mop or sweep "Floors are beneath me" she explained.
- Johnson&Johnson are working on a new type of tinnitus treatment Its an experimental mop.
- How does Google clean their facilities? They use Google Mops.
- A bank robber took a mop and a bucket of soapy water to a job. He cleaned up.
- How many men would it take to mop a floor?
No one knows; they've never done it. - What gets more dirty as it cleans? A mop, a sponge anything really.
- What do you get when you cross a baby with a lawnmower? A mop
Humorous Mop Jokes to Bring Fun and Laughter to Your Life
What funny jokes about mop you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean clean jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make mop pranks.
A University of Alabama graduate gets a job
He shows up to his first day of work, and the boss hands him a mop and a bucket.
"Hey! I will have you know I'm a graduate of the University of Alabama!"
"Oh, I'm sorry," the boss said, "let me show you how to use those."
Jim was lazy, but boy was he clever.
A difficult customer walked into the shop that Jim didn't want to deal with, so he grabbed a mop and pretended to clean up a mess.
The manager came over and asked him what he was doing. After telling him that he was cleaning, the manager said, "It doesn't look messy here."
To which Jim replied, "Why, thank you!"
3 Jokes about bars:
1.
A duck walks into a bar.
He says "Give me a beer. Put it on my bill."
2.
A typewriter walks into a bar.
He says "Give me a beer. Put it on my tab."
3.
A skeleton walks into a bar.
He says "Give me a beer. Uh, and a mop."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Knock, knock… who's there? I eat mop.
I eat mop-who… g**...
Young man fresh out of college gets a job at a factory
When he arrives he surprised that he is assigned as junior janitor. Shocked he asks for the manager who hired him. Didn't you read I have a double major in Social Science and Anthropology
Oh says the man, I must have missed that. OK let me explain. Lift the mop up and put in the bucket, then wipe the dirty floor with it.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Fighting Big Guys for Dummies
I got in a fight one time with a really big guy, and he said, I'm going to mop the floor with your face.
I said, You'll be sorry.
He said, Oh, yeah? Why?
I said, Well, you won't be able to get into the corners very well.
Bazinga!!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Best "knock knock" joke I have.
-Knock Knock.
+Who's there?
-Smell Mop
+Smell Mop who?
(You just made the other person say "smell my p**...". Now wait for them to take a moment to realize it as they wait for you to finish the joke.)
I splurged and bought a mop.
I had to, to clean up the splurge.
Why did the mop confessed to the police?
Because he wanted to COME CLEAN
HAHAHA GET IT, COME CLEAN
Sorry I thought it was funny :(
A skeleton walks into a bar
He walks up to the bartender and orders a beer and a mop.
(Credit goes to the new Pirates of the Caribbean movie but just wanted to share)
They say to mop up your mistakes....
..I Guess my parents are going to need a preatty big mop.
A ghost walks into a bar...
The bartender asks what he wants.
The ghost says "a beer and mop".
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A broom and a mop have s**.... What happens next?
The broom gets sweepy.
