The Best 54 Moo Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Moo jokes. There are some moo hoo jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these moo chee puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Moo Jokes and Puns

Courtesy of my seven year-old son: What do cows call their clothes?


What do evil cows say?

Moo ha ha.

A joke my 10yr old sister has been repeating five times a day: where do cows live?

Moo York.

Knock knock

Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Cow goes.
Cow goes who?
No, Cow goes Moo!

Credit to my 7 year old daughter

Technology has ruined our kids

A group of young children were siting in a circle with their teacher. She was going around in turn asking them all questions.
"Davy, what noise does a cow make? "
"It goes moo. "
"Alice, what noise does a cat make? "
"It goes meow. "
"Jamie, what sound does a lamb make? "
"It goes baaa. "
"Jennifer, what sound does a mouse make? "
"Errr.., it goes.. click! "

A class of 3rd graders return from their field trip to the farm and the teacher asks them, "what kind of noises did you hear at the farm?"

The first kid raises his hand and says, "I heard the cow go moo!"

The second kid raises his hand and says, "I heard the pig go oink!"

The third kid raises his hand and says, "I heard the farmer yell 'get off my tractor you little fucker!'"

What do you call a cow that can't moo?

A milk dud

Credit to my 5 year old nephew

A blonde, a brunette, and a red head are running from the police....

.... they run into a barn to hide. The brunette hides behind a stall of cows, the redhead hides in the goat pen, and the blonde hides behind bags full of potatoes. The police come in and shine their flashlights on the cows. The brunette says "MOO!" and the police shine their lights on the goats. The redhead says "BAHH!", so the police move on to the potatoes. They shine their lights on them and the blonde says "POTATOES!!!"

Damn autocorrect!

My Wife texted me a selfie in a new dress and asked "Does this make my butt look big?"

I texted back "Noo!"

My phone autocorrected my response to "Moo!"

Please send help!

Why does a cow say "moo" when you scare it?

Because it's a cow-word.

The cow says "Moo." The pig says "Oink." The dog says


You can explore moo deja reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean moo remooved dad jokes. There are also moo puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

What do cows say on Halloween?

Still moo.

Knock knock!

Who's there?


Cow who?

A cow says moo, silly.

(my 5 year old daughter made me submit this... )

Deja moo:

The feeling that you've heard this bull before

What lives on a farm and says moo?

a bilingual chicken

Why do cows need four legs to walk?

Because they lactose.


If cows say "moo" and ghosts say "boo", what does the ghost of a cow say?

Nothing. Cows don't have souls.

A Blonde A Brunette and A Redhead trespassed onto a farm

later a farmer came to chase them out so they all went hiding in the barnyard. The redhead hid with the pigs and said "oink" "oink", the brunette hid with the cows and said "moo" moo", and the blonde hid under a potato sack and said "potato" potato"

Two cows are standing...

in the pasture. One turns to the other and says, "Although pi is usually abbreviated to five numbers, it actually goes on to infinity."

The second cow turns to the first and says: "Moo."

(stolen from Plato and a Platypus Walk into a Bar...)

Me and my mate were playing darts

he said "Nearest to bull starts?", I said "Baa," he said "Moo," I said "You're first then."

If cows go moo and sheep go baa, what do pigs say?

I'll make America great again

A dog says to the other, Woof! The other replies, Moo! The first dog is perplexed.

He says, Moo? Why did you say, 'Moo?'

The other dog answers, I'm trying to learn a foreign language.

What did one cow say to another cow at midnight on New Years eve?


Knock knock. Who's there? Confused chicken. Confused chicken who?


From my 7 y/o: What do you call a cow that can't moo yet?


What do you call a bra company for cows?

Moo Moo Melon.

A cow who swears they remember something twice.

Must have deja moo

Told this joke when I was three

Me: "Why did the cow cross the road?"

Parent: "Wh-"

Me: "Moo!"

Bad cows, bad cows,

whatcha gonna moo?!

What's a talkative Zimbabwean cow?

Moo gabby

A stupid joke that my mum tells me a lot

So there are two cows eating grass in a paddock. One cow looks up and says "moo". The other cow says "hey, I was gonna say that!"

why did I buy the cow

To moo the lawn

A bull notices a spider on a cow's back

He tells the cow, don't moo.

One cow said moo, what did the other cow say?

I wanted to say that

What did the cow say to the paintbrush?


As told by my kid this morning.

What did the cow say to the horse


What's a cow's favorite chemical?

molybdenum monoxide


You know what they say about cows in the Bermuda Triangle...

They moo in mysterious waves

DΓ©jΓ  Moo

When you are sure you have heard this bullshit before.

What animals say

The cow goes moo

The horse goes neigh

The dog goes woof

The pig goes "you have the right to remain silent"

A cow has apparently defied great odds and given birth to four calves and have been named

Eeny, Meeny, Miney, and Moo.

What's pink and goes "moo"?

A pig with an identity crisis.

Two cows in a field, one turns to the other and says "MOO"

The other cow replied "I was gonna say that!"

What do you call a counterfeit cow?

Sham moo.

What do you call a Cow on the moon?

A Moo - nwalker

Why does the cow say moo?

So that he can, for a brief moment, escape the unbearable scream that is silence

What does a cow think when it sees another cow get struck by lightening?


cow herd holding a meeting to trap poachers.....

cow head: moo moo moo moo moo moo moo.

cow herd: moo moo moo

all nodded in unison: a pen.

Which newspaper is most popular around cows?

The Moo York Times

What did the cow say to the farmer named Mitch?

Moo Mitch, get out the hay

Who is a cow and horses favorite artist ?

Moo Nay !

What did the cow say when she got hit by a car?


What did the cow saw when she fell into a ditch?


What did the cow say when she fell onto the electric fence?


What did the cow say when she got hit by a train?

"Why does everything always happen to meeee?"

Protip: My dad wrote this joke for me when I was six.

Me and my friend were about to play a game of darts. "Nearest to the bull goes first" I said

He went "bah" I went "moo"

he said "alright you're closest."

Barnyard Animals

What do cows say?

What do sheep say?

And what do pigs say?
Do you know why I pulled you over?

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the moo udderly jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working moo hoofs piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes