Monsters Jokes

Following is our collection of cubes puns and playboys one-liner funnies working better than reddit jokes. Including Monsters jokes for adults, dirty closet jokes and clean trilogy dad gags for kids.

The Best Monsters Puns

Pokemon GO is a blatant ripoff of another popular app...

called Tinder, where you also swipe to find monsters in your area.

PokΓ©mon Go is more popular than Tinder.

Another app which requires you to swipe to find monsters in your surroundings.

What do sea monsters like to eat?

Fish and ships

Pixar movies over the years

What if toys had feelings?

What if bugs had feelings?

What if monsters had feelings?

What if fish had feelings?

What if superheroes had feelings?

What if cars had feelings?

What if rats had feelings?

What if robots hadd feelings?

What if boy scouts had feelings?

What if gingers had feelings?

What if feelings had feelings?

What if dinosaurs had feelings?

What if Mexicans had feelings?

Why are monsters hipsters?

Because they've been coming out of the closet since before it was cool.


Turns out there are TWO Loch Ness Monsters. One of them is quite mean, but the other actually gives away his forestry tools.

A little weird, sure, but it's always nice to see some random axe of Kind Ness.

What's Cookie Monsters favourite band?

Oreo Speedwagon.

So my friend, Rick Astley, asked me for some Pixar movies to watch...

I told him, "You can borrow Toy Story 1, 2, and 3, A Bugs Life, Monsters Inc., Finding Nemo, The Incredibles, Cars 1 and 2, Ratatouille, and Wall*E, but I'm never gonna give you UP!"

What's the difference between Tinder and the PokemonGo app?

Nothing, it both requires swiping to find monsters in your area.

What is cookie monsters favorite war?

Vietnom nom nom nom

I tucked my son into bed...

When I'm about to leave, he looked up at me and said, "Daddy, check for monsters under the bed." Amused, I look underneath for him and see him, another him, shaking under the bed, and he whispers: "Daddy, there's someone on my bed."

Then I grounded the twin because it's a bad joke.


Are monsters good at math?

No, unless you Count Dracula

It's that time of the year when many Americans go around in public pretending to be something they're not, with many choosing to appear as monsters and ghouls. But enough about the elections, it's also Halloween.

But enough about the elections, it's also Halloween.

Tinder is like PokΓ©mon GO

You swipe to catch monsters.

Where did Frankenstein go to get his tattoo done?

Monsters Ink

How many monsters can do basic math?

All of them, unless you count Dracula

There are three monsters that live in my house and steal all of my money,

I like to call them, the accidents, but my wife insists on calling them our children.

So a man told his son he's not scared of anything...

Son: So you're not scared of anything at all? Not even monsters?

Dad: Well, there is one thing...

Son: Which is?

Dad: Exactly.

Why don't Monsters eat Ghosts?

They taste like sheet!!


You should never take what a sea monsters says seriously.

They're always Kraken jokes.

Why do milk monsters walk weirdly?

Because they lactose.

The government has covered up the existence of monsters for centuries...

The truth is kept under Loch and key.

I used to think I was homophobic.

It turns out that I was just afraid of monsters in the closet.

Mike wazowski opens up a tattoo shop

Called Monsters Ink

My room is full of gay monsters!

They keep coming out of the closet.

A Greek guy walks into a tavern and sees two sea monsters arguing

"What's up with them?" he asks.

"Oh, that's scylla and charybdis."

"Are they usually this angry?"

"Yeah, but they're not violent. Just don't get between them."

2 monsters started talking

2 monsters were talking, one said he loved eating humans, the other disagreed. the first monster asked how he was cooking his humans. The second answered "I boiled him."So the first monster then asked if the second could describe the human he was trying to cook the second responded with "well, he was bald with a ring of hair, he wore a brown robe, with a rope around his waist like a belt." The second monster replied "well there's your problem! He was a FRIAR"

who do monsters buy their cookies from?

the ghoul scouts.

What do You call a crowdfunding site for cannibalistic monsters?

Windigogo!

Everyone on the planet is chasing imaginary monsters with their phone

But when I do it I need to "grow up" and "quit looking for Bigfoot."

Dr. Frankenstein entered a bodybuilding contest...

Only to discover he had seriously misunderstood the competition.

They were monsters.

What do you call a badass who kills monsters and knows lots of useless information?

Geralt of Trivia

Everyone in Monsters Inc. is gay.

They're in the closet.

'Hotel Transylvania' missed an opportunity because monsters on a cruise are not on the Love Boat...

They're on a Love Craft.

Nobody understands when I tell them squids are monsters, but I know I'm right because...

Monsters, Inc.

Pokemon Go Is Just Like Tinder

Both apps require you to swipe to catch monsters in your area.

I am the world's most powerful creature. I gulp down monsters whole for lunch.

For the record, I also drink Redbull.

Scientists have discovered a new planet made entirely out of scary monsters!

they named it Tera-Fy

What monsters are all the tools in the toolbox afraid of?

Vampliers

How do monsters like their eggs?

Terri- *fried*

mike wazowski just opened an ice skating parlour

he called it monsters rink

Some monsters have a medical condition in which it is actually imposible to take a cohesive picture of them

Such monsters include: Sasquatch, The Loch Ness Monster, and Mike Wazowski.

My son wanted an intense, hardcore game, where you have build awesome bases, fight monsters, and online play.

So I got him Minecraft.

Yesterday was a really big day for Monsters.

Godzilla King of Monsters, Monster Hunter World dlc and the new Sonic poster were all teased.

Did you know that monsters are gay?

Just don't talk about it though, they aren't ready to come out of the closet

There is an abundance of dragons jokes out there. You're fortunate to read a set of the 45 funniest jokes and monsters puns. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any strangers witze you can hear about monsters.

Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. You can seriously offend people by saying creepy dark humor words to them.

Joko Jokes